Azathoth's Abode on the Plateau of Leng

OK, as well as being Twisted, this is more or less my Thanksgiving post (although I am working on something else for thanksgiving but whether or not its going to be done by then is looking questionable at this point.) So Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

Now, I should preface this by stating neither of the following two collections of assorted strangeness are particularly Thanksgiving themed yet I find them appropriate for the occasion, and while you might not agree, I'm making this post here so too bad

Now besides the stuff about pilgrims and the prayer type stuff, which don't exactly fit the mood of my blog, its rather hard to find thanksgiving related tunes... One obvious subject would have to be turkeys but there also seems to be a rather disappointing volume of turkey songs (plenty of songs that are turkeys but not so much about them) - thus we come to chickens. Chickens are a bird of a different feather, there are tons of chicken tunes - why I could sit here and make chicken posts straight through from now till after I pass out from eating too much turkey on Thanksgiving if I had nothing else to do and also were mentally disturbed enough to want to do that. But after much thought I decided to narrow my chicken posting to one subject and after further thought I decided that the clear choice would of course have to be KFC, after all its finger lickin' good (or so they keep telling me.) And the good Colonel actually put out some neat albums too which always helps. So here we have what I like to call

The Colonel Sanders Extra Large Bucket Of Stuff To Listen To While Chewing On Greasy Fowl

Inside your bucket you will find, along with all the fixings and an extra tub of mashed potatoes and gravy, the following:



Colonel Sanders' Tijuana Picnic




There is actually some really great music on this one - probably, musically speaking, the best album put out by the figure head of a fast food chain that I can think of.


Colonel Sanders' KFC Radio Commercials



Radio spots with the classic KFC jingle - listen as the Colonel himself rants on and on about the various almost magical properties of wondrous wholesome goodness that KFC chicken and its herbs and spices exhibit in any number of situations all while playing KFC jingles at you until you will never eeeever be able to get them out of your brain I got this from Wishbook's Flickr Photostream which is an amazing collection of tons and tons of images from various vintage magazines and catalogs and all sorts of goodness - look at it while you listen to some of these posts. I would.







KFC Training Tapes



Here's the one that really makes this a twisted post - these are what passed for actual training tapes for KFC back in the day. It's Edumucational




The Colonels Mandolin Band - Favorite Old Church Hymns



And here's the one that really makes this a good Thankgiving post - Some nice old church hymns from the Colonels favorite mandolin band!





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And now for Part Deux of my Twisted Turkey Day posts... this one is only probably going to seem in any way related to T-day to me and that's because its a bunch of those freaky Ronco albums they used to have back in the glory days of sugar bomb cereals, saturday morning cartoons, and bubblegum rock - you know "As Seen on TV" and all that rot. How is that T-day related then you ask? Simply because the records we had got played a lot during Thanksgiving time - principally I think to keep the kids passified while the grown ups made holiday dinners and gossipped about everyone in the family This somehow stuck with me and I tend to associate this time of year as the time for goofball novelty and bubblegum rock and the Ronco albums never fail to have a rather mind-warping combo of both on them.

Fun Rock




First up is Fun Rock. Pretty much all the titans of bubblegum are represented here - you have your Archies, Lemon Pipers, the Monkees, Ohio Express, 1910 Fruitgum Company and all sorts of fun!

I have to apologize for the clearly messed up back cover scan - I couldn't find any good scans online so I had to scan them myself and since full LP size albuum covers don't come close to fitting in my scanner, I have to scan them in parts and join them. But in my computer's current state of near total demise funny things happen when I edit audio, video or graphics - stuff like things looking lined up on screen but not in fact being so as far as my program is concerned when I click save. And I deleted my orig scans before I noticed and don't have time or the inclination to fight with jamming the thing back in the scanner so maybe I'll redo it later ::shrug:: The next one turned out better I think.


Funky Favorites




This is my all time favorite of these albums - I played this like crazy as a kid. Once again all the bubblegum rock acts you normally find on these kind of collections are here and you also have The Royal Guardsmen and their Snoopy vs. the Red Baron song, Bobby "Boris" Picket Monster Mash'ing it with the granddaddy of all novelty monster songs, Alan Sherman's Hello Muddah, Hello Faddah, and its got Spiders and Snakes, Beep Beep, Charlie Brown, Junk Food Junkie and on and on ... just look at the cover scan, everything on this one is great! And I always really dug the cover art on this one too - and I had a friend who I swear literally WAS that junk food junkie guy on the cover!


Funny Bone Favorites





I was getting fed up with fighting with the scanner at this point and just used some pics I found of the front cover and a close up of the Mr. Microphone ad on this one that I found over at Erick's excellent Wonderful Wonderblog and took a photo with my junky camera of the back cover which got awful glare no matter what I did (yes that's a hunchback of notre dame figure peaking over the top of it - don't ask me why, I don't question the hunchback - he does what he wants to do). I also think Erick's audio ended up sounding better than mine so I kept that from his post as well. Not sure you can make out what's on this one from the cover pics too well so here's a list:

01 - Debbie Reynolds and Carleton Carpenter - Aba Daba Honeymoon
02 - The Hollywood Argyles - Alley-Oop
03 - The Coasters - Along Came Jones
04 - The Cadets - Stranded In The Jungle
05 - Phil Harris - The Thing
06 - Reunion - Life Is A Rock (But The Radio Rolled Me)
07 - Ray Stevens - Harry, The Hairy Ape
08 - Larry Verne - Mr. Custer
09 - Rick Dees - Disco Duck
10 - Ray Stevens - Ahab The Arab
11 - John Zacherle - Dinner With Drac
12 - Shirley Ellis - The Name Game
13 - Buzz Clifford - Baby Sittin' Boogie
14 - The Clovers - Love Potion #9
15 - The Olympics - Western Movies
16 - Little Jimmy Dickens - May The Bird Of Paradise Fly Up Your Nose
17 - The Coasters - Yakity Yak
18 - David Seville - Witch Doctor


Funny Bone Favorites Vol. II



This is a compilation made by Erick at Wonderful Wonderblog (see Funny Bone above), its seems to have confused me as I had another funny song album shoved in with my Funny Bones album and I forgot where I got this from and (I must be drunk or something) thought that that was this so I originally was quite factually messed up in my post here. Once again I must stress this compilation was put together by Erick and didn't come off an album I have. Here's a track list again but the important thing is it has Leonard Nimoy singing The Ballad Of Bilbo Baggins!!

01 - Leonard Nimoy - The Ballad Of Bilbo Baggins
02 - Mel Blanc - Daffy Duck's Rhapsody
03 - Ray Stevens - Gitarzan
04 - Peter Pan Singers - God Bless My Underwear
05 - Allan Sherman - Hello Muddah, Hello Fadduh
06 - Jimmy Durante - Inka Dinka Doo
07 - Steve Martin - King Tut
08 - Monty Python - Lumberjack Song
09 - Mahna Mahna and The Two Snowths - Mahna Mahna
10 - Dickie Goodman - Mr. Jaws
11 - Chuck Berry - My Ding-A-Ling
12 - Hot Butter - Popcorn
13 - Blues Brothers - Rubber Biscuit
14 - Benny Bell - Shaving Cream
15 - Ray Stevens - The Streak
16 - The Trashmen - Surfin' Bird
17 - Napoleon XIV - They're Coming To Take Me Away, Ha-haaa!
18 - Rolf Harris - Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Sport
19 - Benny Hill - Ting-A-Ling-A-Loo


Goofy Gold



This one was actually put out by HRB music company rather than Ronco, but its the same sort of thing (in fact, it has a quite a few tracks that were also on the Ronco albums, but oh well.) We didn't seem to have the cover for this one either and someone in my family apparently just shoved it in with the Funky Favorites album - and this one is a 2 record set! That means 3 records were shoved in the cover that was meant for 1 - that thing was sure bloated looking when I dug it out to record these! I'm surprised the records were not all scratched to total hell and also that the record sleeve didn't bust open! I could only find that little itty bitty pic, sorry.

Record 1:

01 Monster Mash - Bobby "Boris' Pickett
02 Purple People Eater - Sheb Wooley
03 Wooly Bully - Sam the Sham & The Pharaohs
04 Running Bear - Johnny Preston
05 Beep Beep - The Playmates
06 Battle of New Orleans - Johnny Horton
07 Carlie Brown - The Coasters
08 Pepino the Italian Mouse - Lou Monte
09 Big Bad John - Jimmy Dean
10 Yakety Yak - The Coasters

Record 2:

11 Alley OOP - Hollywood Argyles
12 Does Your Chewing Gum Lose Its Flavour - Lonnie Donegan
13 Transfusion - Nervous Norvus
14 Mr. Custer - Larry Verne
15 Western Movies - The Olympics
16 Chantilly Lace - The Big Bopper
17 King Kong (Your Song) - Pickett and Ferrara
18 Hello Muddah, Hello Fadduh! - Allan Sherman
19 Ahab, The Arab - Ray Stevens
20 Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Sport - Rolf Harris


Ok, I'm done - HAVE A HAPPY & TWISTED, FUN & FUNKY THANKSGIVING!


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