AzureTimm =海滩之贝= Seashells On A Sunlit Beach

Once upon a time I wrote a little poem about the setting sun.
Now looking back, it's like another lifetime's story.
Innocent and naive in the shielded life in campus,
Nothing to do and to think about except for math problems and Chinese textbooks,
On an old-fashioned Nokia 6020,
I poured my innocent heart into my weak English,
Posted them across the globe onto a remote server in northern Europe,
I didn't realize that it could be a legacy of my carefree life.
Which is why I am still blogging.
I will always find the immense beauty in the dying light of the setting sun...
Photo taken on the lawn in front of the Guanghua Twin Towers, Fudan Univ.

These are the paper cranes we made yesterday.
Each one is a innocent soul,
Flying without any burden or agony,
Towards the heaven above...
May they rest in the peaceful heaven.

Precisely 2:28 pm, GMT+8 , seven days after the terrible earthquake which killed more than 30,000 people in China, all alarms, horns on all vehicles will set off in memory of the innocent lives killed in this past week. All national flags of China in the world will descend for three days. All entertainment activities, and even the Olympic torch relay, will stop for three days in mourn for the lives lost.
300,000 people lost their home. 30,000 people lost their lives. 1,300,000,000 Chinese people's heart clenched tightly for the terrible loss.
Please, in honor and memory of these innocent lives, please have three minutes' silence. We Chinese people sincerely appreciate your support, disregarding your nationality, your political beliefs, your everything that's unimportant now.
Thank you.

==============
When the earthquake happened, I was having an English class. Because the class was in 2nd floor (1st floor for British people, who call the 1st floor "ground floor"), and Shanghai is thousands of kilometers from epiccenter, we didn't even feel it. However, more and more noise in the corridors did catch my attention. At that time I didn't know it was earthquake. The students on higher level of the building felt the shaking and evacuated. Later I heard that many evacuated via elevator, which was very wrong. Later when class was dismissed, I saw many students running out of the door. Didn't realize still. But as I entered my dorm and turned on my computer, a little pop-up message in the corner of the screen frozed me entirely.
Earthquake. In Sichuan. China. 7.6 magnitude.
Returning to my senses I quickly grabbed my phone, found the number of my friends who were studying in Sichuan. Anxiety filled my whole heart. Silence. That 10-second silence seemed to stretch into infinite. Then, a female voice told me, Network busy.
Starting to get panicked, I called my friend in Fudan. He told me he couldn't get connected to our friends either.
Heart turning to ice, I quickly sent a bunch of messages to my friends all over China, asking for info.
No. Nothing. Communication was completely cut off.
2 hours passed in chaos. My beloved friends! Where were they?
Then a miracle. When telephone network went completely out of service, internet still worked. One of my friends in Sichuan managed to tell me via QQ, a Chinese instant messenger, that they are okay, just a little minor scrapes.
Relieved, I asked how was the situation. Silence. Silence again.
Later I knew a serious aftershock struck and internet connection was out too.
Knowing prime minister Wen Jiabao was already on plane to Sichuan, my heart settled a little.
But I didn't know that, Sichuan had already turned from heaven it had been into hell it was.
===========
Highways and roads completely destroyed.
Bridges snapped into halves.
Mountains collided together and completely buried a whole county in the valley.
All communications lost to several counties.
Buildings torn into piles of rubble, taking thousands of innocent lives with them.
I didn't believe hell existed. Now I believed.
===========
Someone please tell me this is just a terrible nightmare. I will wake up to find myself late for the first class of Monday...
A devastating sad cry in the corridor shattered my last drop of slim hope.
One of my classmates just lost a relative.
=========
Images of hell crudely ripped my heart out with icy cold claws, shattered it into pieces.
No. No. No. No! This CAN'T BE HAPPENING TO China! No! China had already suffered too much!
Will god listen to me? Stop killing so many innocent people!
=========
Instantly-refreshing death toll on the screen was god's only reply to my prayers.
=========
People's Liberation Army moved more than ten thousand soldiers in one day.
But they were unable to reach the areas which sustained the heaviest blow due to severe weather conditions and extremely complicated land conditions.
So that's your reply, god? Pour heavy rain at time like this?
===========
Ancient poet Li Po once wrote a poem about the mountain roads of Sichuan. The most famous verse was something like, "roads in Sichuan is as difficult to climb as the road to heaven."
For once, I hate Li Po for being so honest.
=========
15 parachute soldiers landed successfully into the epiccenter. It was considered as Mission Impossible in this severe weather. No visual confirmations. No ground guidance. Nothing. They're trading life with lives.
=========
Heavy machines are unable to reach the most needed areas. Thousands of soldiers climbed over the collapsed mountains, in persuit of lives.
=========
Students lined up in front of our school hospital to donate blood. Soon they were told that the blood bank was full.
I opened my wallet, poured every last coin into the donation box.
Rescue persisted..
It's a battle against the god of death.
========
Air strike sirens pierced all our pained ears.
China stopped for three minutes.
When the siren died away, I raised my bowed head. I see my classmates wiping tears off their faces through my own tear filled eyes.
=========
May the dead rest in peace. May the ones who lived be strong, and treasure their lives...

It's happening so fast; I can't even forget the massive messages and wishes I received last year when I turned 19. Loku told me it was the "golden age" of life; now I seem to understand some of it...
Reading message after message off my phone, which hadn't stopped since I turned it on this morning; Thanking everyone who wished me a happy birthday; gathering my thoughts about everything; opening presents; reading cards; All making it so wierd because usually I never received so much attention. Strange really, when you turn old, you feel a strange pleasure, knowing you're becoming less and less energitic, less creative, less lively, and increasingly dull, numb, old, stupid - strange really.
Perhaps that's because it's a checkpoint of some sort in your life; every year, you check your own account: how much gained, how much spent, how much is the balance. So while I thought about everything, I gained... Quite handsomely. And I'm glad.
This means more possiblities have been unlocked in the game of life; as well enjoy them.
So much here... I'm likely to abandon my blog for another month......
Regards, a 20-year-old man, Timm.

A Very Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you, my friends!

Regards, Timm.

Every Chinese people will forever remember The day, 1937 Dec. 13, Japanese invaders committed the most terrible crime any human beings can imagine.
Can you imagine, 300000 people are killed in the most inhuman ways?
Can you imagine, A river was red with all the blood that the Chinese people shed?
===From Aprilsnow===
"... the number was actually more than 360,000 according to Japanese army documents, all these people were slaughtered (including raping of tens of thousands of women) within seven weeks, yes, number 7. The Yangzi River in Nanking was in red color.

Check out this John Hopkins article: Nanking Nightmare

But The Rape of Nanking was the suffering of only one of the many Chinese cities during the Japanese invasion. The total number of Chinese killed by Japanese imperial army in China was over 30 millions, i.e. 30,000,000.

And Japanese Prime minister often warships the war dead in the Japanese war shrine including Class A war criminals (the worst kind), many Japanese history textbooks deny the crimes such that young Japanese have no idea of such history. When talking about WWII, all they emphasize are the two atomic bombs.

The truth is that far more Chinese and other Asians, most civilians, were killed by Japanese army than the Japanese died of the atomic bombs."
See this.











http://www.nj1937.org/english/default.asp

Today the chorus I'm in was about to take part in a competition. This is when we had our makeup and dressed up.. You can see my lips shined in the flashlight of the camera:) The left one is me. My suit is a littli different from others because there wasn't big enough suit for me and they have to specially find one for me.. Guess I've got to exercise more.


Another team is performing. For obvious reason I couldn't take photo of ourselves.. Only to wait for the DV version from our teacher..

By the way, we won the first place~~
Regards, Timm.

As many of my friends have seen, something awfully bad had happened to my blog. 20 of my posts are gone forever with INVALUABLE comments of my dear friends.. I'm very sorry that I can't do anything about it.. My worst fear had happened, which means nothing will make me fear anymore! I'll forget about the loss and continue be myself! Your Timm won't disappoint you! YES!
Regards, a man recovering from the shock of his loss, Timm.

Last year, around this day, I posted something about snow. Thinking back now, it's really like another lifetime's story. Here in Shanghai, you still have to take off your jackets at noon, and put on thick blankets to keep you warm in bed. Strange.. There's no heaters in Shanghai, unlike Harbin. Mum told me yesterday on the phone that heaters are starting to work now, temperature is below zero (C'), sweaters must be applied, thick socks and shoes.. I'm starting to miss that sort of life.
Snow.. Is some faraway memory I must put out of my mind now. I can still remember, if I allow myself a minute's weakness, the way she looked when she was covered with bits of snowflakes in the ice world of our homeland. Her eyelashes are frozen, her cheeks flushed, her ears red from the cold air, her tiny feet carrying her elegantly around the playground.. Oh my.. Thinking of it did something to me. I should stop it, right now..
Really, I miss the world of snow, and really, the semi-cold and semi-warm weather in Shanghai doesn't appeal to me. I just hope I can join her in the field of crystal snow, and find my feeling of home..
Good luck to us both.

Hey! Hey! It's the first time a letter is addressed to me! Ever! Today my classmate handed me a green envelope and asked me whether there's a letter from America coming for me- well, time for the truth, there're two students in our class with the same name- I and a girl, with identical names, both Zhang Chi- and after reciting Kim's name, he gave the letter to me:yes:
Opened it with my trusted little Victorinox knife, it turned out to be a very beautiful postcard, two giant pandas are happily chewing on bamboos. Remembering Kim's poem about bamboo, I'm not surprised to see she had this card. The card was printed by world wildlife fund, on recycled paper. And inside-
Kim's handsome handwriting says,
Timm,
I know you like Pandas, so here's a case with Pandas just for you. Good luck in your studies and take care me yourself.
Talk to you on Opera.
Kim
(SqueakeyCat)
All my roommates shot me envious glances.. Hmmm.. Better write something for our Kim..

Suddenly, life falls into a different routine. Listen to the alarm go off at 6 o'clock, drift back to sleep again, wake with a start around 7 o'clock, grab an apple and shove it down as fast as humanly possible, pack school bag at the speed of light, sprint down the stairs for bicycle, turn on mp3 for English, ride the bike like Harry Potter flying on his broom, find a place to lock my bike in a massive wave of bikes, tapping the buttons on elevator impatiently, praying the elevator will go like rockets someday, searching for the right classroom in a maze of corridors, entering the right classroom only to find the room packed with students- good seats have long been taken.
Squinting my eyes to read the flying words on the blackboard, sticking my ears for the mosquito-like voice of the professors, taking notes like a full-powered typewriter, dozing off every now and then, goto bathroom and try to find the next correct classroom..
Life is like this right?
Well, yesterday when I went out of the bath, I found something I've never seen before- boys waiting in a row at the bathing room! And oh my, girls' line is endless.. Across the playground.. Must be several hundred meters..
Exhausted? Homeworks on the way to bed! Oh my, so many of them.. I suspect I can have the faith to finish them when my 5th child is born.. Which probably means never..