Piece of my heart

No matter how hard you try
you just get hurt
you hurt the other person
You change
they change
you all still get slaughtered
say one thing
then so another
is it really worth it?
just to cry yourself to sleep
night after night
is it really worth it?
They call you the worst of things
followed by 'I love you'
does that make it ok?
constantly natious
headaches
bodyaches
that's all heart break causes
even thoug it's not competely broken
held on by a tiny chunk
hope
compassion
dreams
promises
and somehow, still love
what's the point?
all the hurt?
why is it so hard to let go?
or to just go back to how things were?
back when it was all a crush...
back to the first awkward kiss
the first time we held hands
the first time crying in his arms
those first connections...
I just want that again
I just want to feel the raw love, building up
before we even discoverd it was love
before the fighting
before the pain
before the jelousy
before the anger
how did it lead to this?
I want to go back
I want to stop falling
I want to stop geting hurt
I want to live again
I want to be myself again
not some broken record
I want to know love again
I need to know
I want to want to live again
I need to.