Never to Forget the Fear

A poem I wrote about my experience with an abuse person.
My friend Marcus sent me an email message that inspired me to write about it here

Never to Forget the Fear
Never to forget the fear of losing myself
Never to forget the fear of saying something wrong
Never to forget the fear of losing my family
Never to forget the fear of losing my friends
Never to forget the fear of being hit
Never to forget the fear you gave our child
Never to forget the fear of staying with you
Never to forget the fear of leaving you,
for you put the fear of me being killed
by you in me
Never to forget the fear of you
By: ©CR
02/17/2008

Nature of your loveBirthday Calculator

Comments

funzfunz81 Wednesday, November 26, 2008 5:33:22 AM

That's a nice poem, sad and very deep... *hugs*

KittyliciousZaphira Wednesday, November 26, 2008 6:17:10 AM

Sad and true. There are fears you just never forget. sad

KarenNerak Wednesday, November 26, 2008 7:17:15 AM

Lovely, Carol! smile

LéazzBabyJay99 Wednesday, November 26, 2008 8:32:18 AM

Sighh.. I always have that fear......... sad

r♡serose-marie Wednesday, November 26, 2008 9:13:53 AM

heart

Dacotah Wednesday, November 26, 2008 11:23:42 AM

Thank you idaughter. *hugs*

Dacotah Wednesday, November 26, 2008 11:26:02 AM

Zaphira *hugs*

Dacotah Wednesday, November 26, 2008 11:27:19 AM

Thank you Karen.

Dacotah Wednesday, November 26, 2008 11:30:26 AM

Léazz sweety, please don't fear. *hugs*

Dacotah Wednesday, November 26, 2008 11:31:07 AM

Rose-Marie heart

John ..... (Loku) lokutus-prime lokutus-prime Wednesday, November 26, 2008 5:31:21 PM

sad Carol, I read from line five down (not including the title) that a tale of physical abuse emerges. sad

I send you my prayers. God protect you, amen

Dacotah Wednesday, November 26, 2008 5:42:14 PM

Thank you my Dear friend Loku.
Yes, I was abused physically and emotionally by my first husband for 7 years. I have been out of that relationship since 1988, thank God.
Took me years to find myself again and to this day, years after, the fear can show up again when someone yells at me. It's gotten better as I have tried to stop the fear. The link I gave in the post (here) explains more.
God protect all that are still in a bad relationship. Amen.

Bad WolfCois Wednesday, November 26, 2008 8:28:36 PM

Nicely written.. Glad you got out of that situation..

John ..... (Loku) lokutus-prime lokutus-prime Wednesday, November 26, 2008 8:47:51 PM

dear friend Carol, it is shocking to hear about the abuse. All to often, these days, one reads about similar things in the news papers, or sees or hears about it on tv or radio. It's horrendous to even imagine the physical abuse. One would have to be a psychologist to know why these things happen, but in simple terms there is no valid reason for a man to ever strike a woman. The long-term emotional & physical abuse, which may arise from some sort of hate-relationship, or even some sort of mental illness, should be noticed by neighbors or fellow-workers or even by local trades-people. But often it is not noticed by others, including the family physician, and eventually something must give and the tragedy be resolved. You have resolved the intial point of "getting out" some nearly 20 years ago, but clearly it has left its mark. I add my prayers to all that has been said to you here by your virtual friends. I hope your outside friends and social services are able to give you support and day-today friendship and comfort. God bless you and keep a watch over you (amen).

Your friend, Loku

Dacotah Wednesday, November 26, 2008 8:56:01 PM

Thank you Cois. I am glad I'm out too, mostly for my daughter's sake.

Dacotah Wednesday, November 26, 2008 9:55:57 PM

My Dear Friend Loku,
I have learned the reason why a man hits a woman, for controll of her and put the fear in her so she will beileve his threat of killing her if she leaves him. Others do notice but do not help for whatever reason be it because they don't know what to do or how to help or if they think it won't help because many times when a woman gets help to get away often goes back because of the fear of him killing her and/or the hope that he will stop like he promises he will because she does love him. I have no outside support my friend. I thank you from the bottom of my heart for your kind words and prayers. Thank you.
God Bless you and watch over you my friend. Amen.
Your friend,
Carol

John ..... (Loku) lokutus-prime lokutus-prime Wednesday, November 26, 2008 9:58:11 PM

I want to thank you for your further explanation. Such things, such nightmare situations,where all 'witnesses' are blind and all innocents have their life threatened, are usually the stuff of plays or movie dramas or in books written by authors of fiction. But here you prove that these are real nightmares that take place in actuality and it is a deeply saddening and horrifying thing to read. Thank you for telling about it. It is a trauma for you to remember these things. I pray God you will obtain closure soon, dear friend Carol. God bless you and give you peace (amen).

Dacotah Wednesday, November 26, 2008 10:11:48 PM

Thank you my dear friend Loku.
God Bless you Loku. Amen.

John ..... (Loku) lokutus-prime lokutus-prime Wednesday, November 26, 2008 10:28:35 PM

Amen

Dacotah Wednesday, November 26, 2008 10:31:34 PM

smile

H82typ Wednesday, November 26, 2008 11:16:00 PM

  Carol, *hugs and heart * I'm glad you got out of that situation, for yours and your Daughters sake! smile

Dacotah Thursday, November 27, 2008 12:54:30 AM

Thank you Dennis
heart Hugs smile

Stomyr Thursday, November 27, 2008 10:28:54 AM

HUGZ

dɹɐzılpǝkɔıw ɐʞɐ ɹǝɥgɐllɐg lǝbɐsıwickedlizard Thursday, November 27, 2008 10:42:19 AM

awww It is awful what some people go through... it is SO wrong... sad


Hugs.

LéazzBabyJay99 Thursday, November 27, 2008 12:12:45 PM

Sigh..

Dacotah Thursday, November 27, 2008 4:41:32 PM

HUGZ Stomyr

Dacotah Thursday, November 27, 2008 4:43:19 PM

Yes it is awful Issy what some people go through. I was one of the lucky ones that my abuse from him wasn't as bad as some go through and that my daughter and I got out.

Hugs

Dacotah Thursday, November 27, 2008 4:45:24 PM

Hi Léazz love you.

Nicolas Borgsmidtnopanic Saturday, November 29, 2008 4:41:45 PM

You´re brave and strong woman Carol. Writing about it brings things up again up Well done!! heart

Dacotah Saturday, November 29, 2008 6:29:43 PM

Thank you Nic. heart

Nicolas Borgsmidtnopanic Saturday, November 29, 2008 8:04:05 PM

You´re welcome Carol smile

Dacotah Saturday, November 29, 2008 8:36:10 PM

smile

Esther-Sugar Winxsugarwinx Thursday, December 4, 2008 9:05:32 AM

I'm NOT that scary!!!!! sad

John ..... (Loku) lokutus-prime lokutus-prime Thursday, December 4, 2008 1:48:25 PM

Carol - up

Dacotah Thursday, December 4, 2008 2:04:09 PM

No you are not iMom. *Hugs*

Loku smile

MettePusilille Friday, April 10, 2009 10:45:22 AM

As your Dash-movie we might think more about how we uses our lifes.
What is important and not be experimented with.
Really good written with a thoughtful meaning behind the words!

Dacotah Friday, April 10, 2009 10:49:58 AM

Thank you Mette.

MettePusilille Friday, April 10, 2009 10:51:24 AM

up

Dacotah Friday, April 10, 2009 10:54:46 AM

Mette, if you click the "here" link you will see why I wrote this.
I was abused my my ex-husband and the email I got made me think of posting about abuse.

MettePusilille Friday, April 10, 2009 10:58:00 AM

no no Carol! heart heart

Dacotah Friday, April 10, 2009 11:00:36 AM

It's ok Mette, it is good for me to write about it, it helps me.
I'm getting over it slowly but surely.
I learned alot from it.
heart heart

MettePusilille Friday, April 10, 2009 11:04:05 AM

Hugs

Dacotah Friday, April 10, 2009 11:08:07 AM

Awww, thank you Mette, that's so sweet.
Hugs

MettePusilille Friday, April 10, 2009 11:12:47 AM

Thanks yourself Carol!
Your life can not have been all good. I feel like crying now... sad

Dacotah Friday, April 10, 2009 11:19:43 AM

Awww, Mette, please do NOT cry.
Hugs
Hugs

MettePusilille Friday, April 10, 2009 11:22:12 AM

Smile18.com Thanks! heart

Dacotah Friday, April 10, 2009 11:23:25 AM

You are welcome Mette.
Thank you for the hugs. heart

MettePusilille Friday, April 10, 2009 11:25:30 AM

wink same to you wink

Dacotah Friday, April 10, 2009 11:29:09 AM

happy

Lovinmalamuteslovinmalamutes Monday, May 25, 2009 1:28:36 PM

Wow this hits home for me. The abuse was from parents for me but abuse is abuse no matter the abuser!!!cry
I am glad you have healed somewhat. I don't know if you ever heal completely as I never have.sad

Write a comment

New comments have been disabled for this post.