Boss Radio

It seems it's time for us to go go go down to Lazytown where it's the start of a brand new day. One of the attractions of this place is that things are upside down and adverture's just a moment away. Unfortunately the song doesn't stop there, we also learn that along the way we'll meet Robbie with his rotton plan, and Sporticus saving the day. Suddenly there seems no point in going on. I now know what's going to happen. Lazytown will be threatened by rotton Robbie and the guy with the dangerous moustache and Icelandic accent will spring into action and thwart him as no rotton Robbie has ever been thwarted before since yesterday. I mean, I now know this just from listening to the signature tune, why would I want to watch the programme when I already know what's going to happen? What's my motivation?

Well apparently there are other motivations for watching Lazytown. To whit, Stephanie.

Isn't Youtube great? You can find almost anything on there. Even old songs that you can only vaguely remember. You just put in what you do remember and ultimately if you search through enough results you'll find that someone somwhere has published a video of her/himself singing it, or even video of a slab of vinyl going round, and round, and round (And round) while the record plays.

I had reason to do this recently, and found what I was looking for quite quickly. Strangely, one of the entries gave the correct title of the song preceeded by the word 'Lazytown'. The song I seeked (I feel as though that should be 'The song I soke'...) was not a tune that I would have associated with any 'beebies TV', let alone that particular show, although I confess that at that point I had only seen about 5 minutes of it, in total. I have now seen a whole lot more.

The Youtube entry turned out to be another version of the song I was looking for, with video clips from the programme carefully synchronised to it to give the impression that Stephanie and friends are performing it. In the blurb about the clip the poster had written "And if any of you paedos out there feel the urge to post and say you love Stephanie and you'd like to 'fuk' her, please go away. She's really getting rather tired of it." My attention was piqued.

The guy was right. Almost half of the Lazytown entries I viewed contained a message to the effect that Stephanie was great and the poster would dearly like to fuk her.

I suppose to an extent I can understand the attraction. The programme is splendidly innocent. Stephanie has cute pink hair, and little pink shoes, and a very litte pink dress that obligingly moves out of the way every time she jumps up and down, which she does quite a lot. All the strange people who watch children's TV for some kind of gratification must feel like it's Christmas every day. For some reason the realisation that these people exist doesn't bother me as much as it might have say ten years ago. We now know that they're everywhere, some of them are probably reading this blog because they Googled 'Lazytown', hi there guys! No need to read any further, there's nothing for you here, back to Youtube with you.

The reason I'm not as concerned as I once might have been is quite simple, as long as they're watching that little oblong screen they're not out prowling the streets. Thoughts are harmless as long as they stay that way, if thoughtcrime ever became a reality I'd be arrested for the number of ways I've assassinated Margaret Thatcher, and come to think of it, all those times when as a kid reading Cine-goer magazine I fantasized about kissing Marilyn Monroe in her swimsuit... Aaugh, I'm damned for eternity.

What does concern me is why all these weird individuals consistently mis-spell the old Anglo-Saxon word 'fuck'.

I think we should be told.