Crime, it's (Still) everywhere....
Thursday, 5. June 2008, 19:58:01
Ah yes, one of the great moments in TV history. Frank Forello, the beleaguered police captain in 'Hill Street Blues', is trying to get a grip of all the demands upon his time. Gang wars, liquor store hold ups, a mayoral visit, rogue cops... Suddenly his wife, Faye, bursts into the room. "Crime, Frank," she cries. "It's everywhere!"
It still makes me laugh. A moment of extra brilliance in one of the most brilliant cop shows ever created.
It's just that when it happens to me I don't find it funny.
Picture it. Mum's car won't start but we need to go to the shops, she's running out of puddings and she likes her pud. As it happens I've just run out of fresh vegetables as well, and convenient as they are, frozen veggies just don't make it. So I break out the Land Rover.
My Land Rover doesn't get much use these days. Between the petrol prices and global warming there isn't much call for a gas-guzzling-go-anywhere vehicle.
So we get to the Co-op and the only parking place is in a disabled spot. As it happens my mother has a disabled parking badge, so, incongruous as it seems, this gentle giant of a vehicle pulls into the spot, I pull an old beer crate out of the back for mum to use as a step ladder to get out of it, and we leave it with the badge in the side window and commence shopping.
When we get back I open the back door to put our hard-gotten-gains in, and I see small shards of glass on the back seat. Well there's only one place that they can have come from and I turn 'round to look at the rear window. It has two giant cracks in it. Further investigation reveals that it has received two tiny high impacts about the size of an airgun pellet. There's about two yards between the back of the vehicle and the store, so someone's fired at it from point blank range.
And the glass took it.
Annoyed as I am at this violation of my vehicle I nevertheless find myself kind of amused as I imagine these kids (The schools were just coming out so I'm making a bit of an assumption here...) wanging a shot off at point blank range and getting nothing more than a little pitting and a crack for their trouble, so they try again and still get nowhere.
They depart, a picture of chagrin.
In fact if I'm lucky the pellet might even have bounced back and hit them.
It still makes me laugh. A moment of extra brilliance in one of the most brilliant cop shows ever created.
It's just that when it happens to me I don't find it funny.
Picture it. Mum's car won't start but we need to go to the shops, she's running out of puddings and she likes her pud. As it happens I've just run out of fresh vegetables as well, and convenient as they are, frozen veggies just don't make it. So I break out the Land Rover.
My Land Rover doesn't get much use these days. Between the petrol prices and global warming there isn't much call for a gas-guzzling-go-anywhere vehicle.
So we get to the Co-op and the only parking place is in a disabled spot. As it happens my mother has a disabled parking badge, so, incongruous as it seems, this gentle giant of a vehicle pulls into the spot, I pull an old beer crate out of the back for mum to use as a step ladder to get out of it, and we leave it with the badge in the side window and commence shopping.
When we get back I open the back door to put our hard-gotten-gains in, and I see small shards of glass on the back seat. Well there's only one place that they can have come from and I turn 'round to look at the rear window. It has two giant cracks in it. Further investigation reveals that it has received two tiny high impacts about the size of an airgun pellet. There's about two yards between the back of the vehicle and the store, so someone's fired at it from point blank range.
And the glass took it.
Annoyed as I am at this violation of my vehicle I nevertheless find myself kind of amused as I imagine these kids (The schools were just coming out so I'm making a bit of an assumption here...) wanging a shot off at point blank range and getting nothing more than a little pitting and a crack for their trouble, so they try again and still get nowhere.
They depart, a picture of chagrin.
In fact if I'm lucky the pellet might even have bounced back and hit them.
WIDGETIZE