The Haven of Darkness..

I just love lying in bed with my last smoke and let my mind loose..
Of course there's two sides to this for me with a optional third.
First it'll:
*go about what happened during the day.
*what I shouldn't have done.
*what I'm gonna do.
*why does smoke drift into my fucking eyes when it's dark? Stings like shit.
Lights on again.
Then comes that dreamer side of me. Imaginative even maybe but it borders fantasy and what could just happen.
That part of me that's all business and a whole lot more fantasy.
The side that yearns to make a difference in having a good life and my current situation.
It sounds rather crude when typed that way but it's the part that sees something and then sees possibilities if there is any.
Believe me. I've had many of these little ideas but not writing it down it just blows away with this eye stinging smoke.
I could swear this cigarette is mocking me. .
Ahem..
Entrepreneur in me is one thing that never stops functioning.
Remember "Cost Efficient Gravestones?"
No?
Well it was me who came up with it but I couldn't get the backers or materials to complete the job.
My one prototype is now a gravestone on my dear little Mishka..

Sidetracked again.
Then comes the third part.
The dreamer part. The fantasy that just is never realised.
The part where one of my ideas actually take off. The one which puts the fucking aglet to shame. .
The one where money is rolling in and I'm living the good life.
Squash.
.
.
Yep. I squash those now. It's a great dream with all the little things opening in life but it's so far from reality it aches me as something doesn't work.
Did I have faith enough in any of my ideas to give them a chance?
Did I actually think it through and begin strategic plans to execute said idea?
Did I even believe for a moment that when it comes to dreaming it's best to dream of things that the tangible world can't touch?

It's a harsh little world and this I know from experience.
(this is where I begin to rant)
Blah blah bullshit..

*I rub my head in silent contemplation on what to type next*

What was the point? Is there a point? What would the use for this be?

I believe that none but me will find use out of a post written by just another insignificant blogger in a reality that is ours.

Would you like to know the use?
I fucking would too.. .
Seriously though.
The point to myself is to get my ass out of some imaginative world where everything just goes the right way.
Get off my ass and actually think something through before opening my big gob to the world. (clinically impossible)
To man-up for a change and realise that I've got not much to lose but everything to gain though doing it more wisely then some sort of success will be reached.
Squash.
Again with the fucking unrealistic dreams.

Nothing comes easy and by fantasizing that they do.. *pugh*

Ok I'm gonna think of something else now..