Ellan

I recently read an article in the swedish magazine "All About science"(allt om vetenskap) about a projectidea made by a man called James Mclane, who worked as an engineer for NASA. He´s been working on an idea about a journey mars.A one-way ticket journey to be more exact.

Which signify that the astronaut would travel through space with no crew members but not yet alone. Mclane advocate that the people on planet earth would follow this passenger through his journey to reach mars, he would never feel alone rather the diverse. The journey would be broadcast on different tvshows. Every step of the passengers journey would be published and so on.

The arrival to mars would be planned in detail and Mclane mean that a camp would be ready to be used when the astrounat arrives. He would ,if everything goes as Mclanes vision, soon be visited by other people willing to leave earth for a one way ticket and a new life on planet mars. Hopefully they would start a new colonny on the planet, more and more people would join the project with the knowledge that they may never see planet earth again.Hopefully in the future we would be able to arrange two-way tickets to mars.

If this vision ever gets approved I don´t know.. but it sure sound a bit scary to me.. leaving earth with the knowledge that you may never see planet earth ever again. Alone on a planet totally uninhabited by other life.. what would you do?
kick dust or sand all day until the day you die?
I`m sure there´s people who´s going to assign voluntary to this project, but I´m not sure if it´s right?
why should we force ourselves on a new planet when we aren´t capable of taking care of the one we´re allready located on?

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Mass effect, awsome game! I played it on 360 a couple of monhts ago and really liked it, never been a fan of the sicene fiction themes before but this game got it all:)

Lifes going good in sweden! still works in the game shop:D been checking for some educations, but haven´t really found anything that caught my attention.

I´ve meet a new guy adrian, we´ve been togheter for nearly three months now, and it does feel awsome, I´ll let the future tell what will come next!

take care all! hope you all have some wonderful summervacations and activites!

love Ell!

swedish shows are often bad reflections on the "original" shows, but in this season there are some actual talents in this show! gosh thoose kids can sing! *jealous*!





okey this kid can´t really sing but gosh hihi such a funny dance:) cred for that!

haha yeap that´s right I´m not 20 anymore, I turned 21 today:D it has been an awsome day, quite and peaceful:D and a lot of cake! yum yum yum!
I don´t know why but I´m starting to feel old?

why is it? how come I feel so much older now then I did last birthday? maybe its all of the new experience I´ve gone through this year that has made me feel.. not older .. but wiser maybe?
I´m starting to change:D my values and my goals:)
I´m still young and I got my whole life ahead of me, but what´s different from last year is that I feel more mature?

friday will be celebartion day:hat: , I´m so exhited to get out and meet people and just talk talk talk! haha I´m such a social little bug!

hihi and yeay here´s some "ellan art" and a pic of my new hairstyle (as we all know I love to change my hair;) )

My head is a hurricane! blowing and keep messing up the things I sorted up.. things I just started to put on the right places again?! moving things upside down? gaaah I hate to order up the mess he leaves behind!

I gave 2 years of my life to him.. and I gave him EVERYTHING.. by everything I mean my heart. He got it.. the heart some people had struggle to get for so long, I gave to him in a heart beat.. I could have gave it to someone who treasured it yet I gave it to a demolation truck!
in every way I though were possible I gave him attention! never once has he said " hey babe thanks for being my girl" or "I can´t belive you did this just for me?".. why did I keep on struggeling for someone who clearly don´t give a fuck!(sorry for the laungege, just so darn upset).

I´m going to be very honest.. Before I meet andy I didn´t really realise what love was about.. I did meet people.. but for short dates or relationships.. when I wanted it to end I ended it, didn´t look back and keept on the same way? never did I realise what it ment to honstly love somebody.. what it ment to give someone your heart? I sometimes wonder if somebody felt like I do now for me? when I just turned my back and left them:( have I ever broked a heart this badly? leaving the person grasping after the pieces that are missing? I feel ashamed.. maybe I deserve this.. or do anyone really deserve things like this?
here it comes: I´m sorry for everything I´ve done, If I have ever hurt you like this, please accept my biggest appoligie:o , I´m truly sorry.

Gosh I´m really deep today:confused: maybe I really needed to get this out? I do feel a bit better.. but I hate to let other people grumble about my "misery".. I don´t want people to look at me like a victim and feel sorry for me.. I just want things to come out! I want the hurrucane to leave!

From now on I´ll pick my partners with great caution:) maybe that´s the best cure to a broken heart? to never break it again?

giiee I really showed my emo side today huh:D I do feel better though! I´m in the game again, now I´m going to stop whining and do something useful, like getting a laundary time:P

thought of the day:
why are hate and love so close connected? so close that you can feel it both at the same time?


"you´re allways around me yet I don´t see you?how come?"

wiiiee New years eve was awsome!

I went to sthlm for new years eve celebrations it turned out wicked! the hostess were the drunkest person and she drank like a sailor yet she could stand on two feets and even talk at 05.00am! That´s worth an apploade!

I hadn´t meet all of the guests before so it was a get-to-know-festival for me! I don´t think I found anyone that I didn´t like in the mess of drunk people sqeeuzed into a little appartment. Everyone were friendly and social.

I got some pictures of the party! haha beaware they are awful! I look like an oversized lady in that dressy thing! hmmm maybe I can find someone with a thing for patterned-lady-looking girls? hahahaha