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Ellan

sharing stories,thoughs and misstakes!

T-shirts my passion !

I got a passion for t-shirts! I can´t help it but I drowl after some really nice t-shirts unfortunatly they are only availabe on the internet from USA, so I can´t buy them that often otherwise my wallet will satrt to cry its heart out:S

I started to take some pics and I thought "hey why can´t I be a t-shirt model!? that would be awsoem getting a bunch of free stuff as payment?" haha unfortunatly tha´t would mena that I would have to get to USA to shoot and that would cost a whole lot of more money then just ordering the t-shirts.. hmmpf

haha anyway I had fun and took some nice pics anyway and made a video out of it:P
haha the "ell modelcarrer"



ps. I hate myself for not being able to write as much as before hopefully I´ll get some more time over for that in the future! blogging isn´t anything I´m going to give up;)!

One-way ticket to mars!

I recently read an article in the swedish magazine "All About science"(allt om vetenskap) about a projectidea made by a man called James Mclane, who worked as an engineer for NASA. He´s been working on an idea about a journey mars.A one-way ticket journey to be more exact.:alien:

Which signify that the astronaut would travel through space with no crew members but not yet alone. Mclane advocate that the people on planet earth would follow this passenger through his journey to reach mars, he would never feel alone rather the diverse. The journey would be broadcast on different tvshows. Every step of the passengers journey would be published and so on. :alien:

The arrival to mars would be planned in detail and Mclane mean that a camp would be ready to be used when the astrounat arrives. He would ,if everything goes as Mclanes vision, soon be visited by other people willing to leave earth for a one way ticket and a new life on planet mars. Hopefully they would start a new colonny on the planet, more and more people would join the project with the knowledge that they may never see planet earth again.Hopefully in the future we would be able to arrange two-way tickets to mars.:alien:

If this vision ever gets approved I don´t know.. but it sure sound a bit scary to me.. leaving earth with the knowledge that you may never see planet earth ever again. Alone on a planet totally uninhabited by other life.. what would you do?
kick dust or sand all day until the day you die?
I`m sure there´s people who´s going to assign voluntary to this project, but I´m not sure if it´s right?
why should we force ourselves on a new planet when we aren´t capable of taking care of the one we´re allready located on?
:alien:
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Mass effect, awsome game! I played it on 360 a couple of monhts ago and really liked it, never been a fan of the sicene fiction themes before but this game got it all:)

Lifes going good in sweden! still works in the game shop:D been checking for some educations, but haven´t really found anything that caught my attention.

I´ve meet a new guy adrian, we´ve been togheter for nearly three months now, and it does feel awsome, I´ll let the future tell what will come next!

take care all! hope you all have some wonderful summervacations and activites!

love Ell!:heart:




Funny how time just seems to fly by!

Hi all!
Seems like life just seems to fly by me.. the days just passes so quickly, there´s job,boyfriend and friends.. all mixed into my life.. trying to get time to be enough for all but I can´t seem to put all the pieces togheter! would love to have enough time for everybody, but its impossible1
I hope verythings cool with ya all my opera buddys! I hope you all have a rad time while ya living your lives:D
miss my blog time!
love ya all loadz!

here´s some pics!
feel free to visit "my" swedish community ----> http://bilddagboken.se/p/main.html
password:apa

pusss puss




Some swedish talents 2008:P

swedish shows are often bad reflections on the "original" shows, but in this season there are some actual talents in this show! gosh thoose kids can sing! *jealous*!





okey this kid can´t really sing but gosh hihi such a funny dance:) cred for that!


Loooong time no see!!

hey all!
It´s been a rocky few months and I´ve been learning a lot from it:D I´ve grown as a person and I´ve learned a lot about myself:o

the andy break-up,the "what I´m I gonna do with my life" thoughts and so on:) every thing is clearing up! haha I guess its the turning 21 blessing;) 1 year older, 1 year of new experience and 1 year of "grown up points" such as getting to bed early and appreciating a good cup of coffe and so on:coffee: haha but don´t ya all think I´ve gone boring! haha naaah I´m still living my life like a rockstar!:cool: hihi okey okey I´ve never lived it like a rockstar hihi but ya get the picture;):wink:

I´ve missed ya all a lot! and I´m actually been doing some short picture movies:D
hihi some party movies and some ego movies:) hihi ya know me a lil bit of and show off;) but in a good way I hope:D hihihi

here we go fellows!:happy: :headbang:

emo ell:P should be more like ego ell:p p:


dedicated to my dearest friend!


happy birthday to me!

haha yeap that´s right I´m not 20 anymore, I turned 21 today:D it has been an awsome day, quite and peaceful:D and a lot of cake!:yes: :yes: yum yum yum!
I don´t know why but I´m starting to feel old?

why is it? how come I feel so much older now then I did last birthday? maybe its all of the new experience I´ve gone through this year that has made me feel.. not older .. but wiser maybe?
I´m starting to change:D my values and my goals:)
I´m still young and I got my whole life ahead of me, but what´s different from last year is that I feel more mature?

friday will be celebartion day:hat: :drunk: , I´m so exhited to get out and meet people and just talk talk talk! haha I´m such a social little bug!

hihi and yeay here´s some "ellan art" and a pic of my new hairstyle (as we all know I love to change my hair;) )
:star: :star: :star: :star: :star: :star: :star: :star: :star: :star: :star: :star: :star: :star:



I want to break free!

haha its funny when I listened to this song yesterday I was like " Wow that´s me!!"
haha and noo its not the cheap makeup and the lady looking hair I´m refering to:P



and I found myself sketching again! I haven´t sketched since I was in middleschool or something! haha I do need more practise but boy its fun! I´m thinking of getting a sketching class, to get my mind on something else for a while:D





I hate you yet I still love you??

My head is a hurricane! blowing and keep messing up the things I sorted up.. things I just started to put on the right places again?! moving things upside down? gaaah I hate to order up the mess he leaves behind!

I gave 2 years of my life to him.. and I gave him EVERYTHING.. by everything I mean my heart. He got it.. the heart some people had struggle to get for so long, I gave to him in a heart beat.. I could have gave it to someone who treasured it yet I gave it to a demolation truck!:insane:
in every way I though were possible I gave him attention! never once has he said " hey babe thanks for being my girl" or "I can´t belive you did this just for me?".. why did I keep on struggeling for someone who clearly don´t give a fuck!(sorry for the laungege, just so darn upset).

I´m going to be very honest.. Before I meet andy I didn´t really realise what love was about.. I did meet people.. but for short dates or relationships.. when I wanted it to end I ended it, didn´t look back and keept on the same way? never did I realise what it ment to honstly love somebody.. what it ment to give someone your heart? I sometimes wonder if somebody felt like I do now for me? when I just turned my back and left them:( have I ever broked a heart this badly? leaving the person grasping after the pieces that are missing? I feel ashamed.. maybe I deserve this.. or do anyone really deserve things like this?
here it comes: I´m sorry for everything I´ve done, If I have ever hurt you like this, please accept my biggest appoligie:o , I´m truly sorry.

Gosh I´m really deep today:confused: :confused: maybe I really needed to get this out? I do feel a bit better.. but I hate to let other people grumble about my "misery".. I don´t want people to look at me like a victim and feel sorry for me.. I just want things to come out! I want the hurrucane to leave!

From now on I´ll pick my partners with great caution:) maybe that´s the best cure to a broken heart? to never break it again?

giiee I really showed my emo side today huh:D I do feel better though! I´m in the game again, now I´m going to stop whining and do something useful, like getting a laundary time:P

thought of the day:
why are hate and love so close connected? so close that you can feel it both at the same time?


"you´re allways around me yet I don´t see you?how come?"



the weekend:D

Have you ever meet a person that you like instantly? you just know that you will have a good time no matter what with him/her?
I meet a person this weekend who are exactly like that! he really makes me smile! the way he talks the way he carry himself:D he`s awsome!
the funny thing is that we didn´t do anything? we just chilled and watched a very bad horror movie:P made some pancakes and just joked around! teasing each other with bad jokes and maybe a little pillow fight! haha but auch he throws really hard!:yikes: :yikes: I better skill up and give him revansch!

I don´t know if this is the beginning of something nice or just the beginnig to a very close friendship! I´ll just let time tell:p





hihihi:o :o:

love ya all!

puss på er















New Years Eve and just a song I´ve decided to like:D

wiiiee New years eve was awsome!

I went to sthlm for new years eve celebrations it turned out wicked! the hostess were the drunkest person and she drank like a sailor yet she could stand on two feets and even talk at 05.00am! That´s worth an apploade! :cheers:

I hadn´t meet all of the guests before so it was a get-to-know-festival for me! I don´t think I found anyone that I didn´t like in the mess of drunk people sqeeuzed into a little appartment. Everyone were friendly and social.:yes:

I got some pictures of the party! haha beaware they are awful! I look like an oversized lady in that dressy thing! hmmm maybe I can find someone with a thing for patterned-lady-looking girls? hahahaha