Monday, February 7, 2011 12:51:26 AM
From young I have been taught to be a good girl, always be obedient, always how to serve but I was also taught to be independent, to have goals and to work hard to achieve them. In part it is this education that had raised great conflict in what I consider to be one of the social standards that women can't seem to by pass without the lose of some thing!?1? It's a scale that is in constant flux, you either give too little or take away to much. Will we ever achieve a state of balance or will it always be in a constant shifting motion, ever swaying....
Sunday, October 18, 2009 11:12:19 PM
Feb 28, 2007
Today the sun rises with a dark vale. Half awake , half asleep, surprised out of REM only to hear bad news. "Something has happened," my aunt says "we have to go." My clouded taughts soon become as blank as a white sheet of paper. There is a tension in the air yet the morning fog is so Thick you can hardly see two cars in front of you. My mind became reactive and filled with taughts.
When we finally heard the news; old memories and wounds reappeared. Tears wanted to consume me yet i could not let them out. I restrained myself thinking all the while of life's Irony.
When she chose to bitch slap you in the face, she has no mercy.
I find myself remembering my mother, my uncle then my grandfather, from my father's side all of whom which have already passed away. But what worries me more are the ones left behind. I worry of how my aunt feels, the dredging up of not so old memories. Yet she understands this pain far better than than i ever could. I console myself in the taught that i do not suffer alone, There are many who know this pain, this is what brings me closer to them.
And so i go on for their sakes as well as my own.
Monday, June 23, 2008 11:28:21 PM
(anime Fan) For Cowboy Bebop's Faye Valentine

Lost in the past
Little hope for the future
Nothing a bottle of vodka wouldn't kill
Empty spaces needn't be filled
Home....It's not there again
Play those blues hard
But play it deep
Let it reach into my soul
Let it take me away....
To a place where it's real
The Blues ain't got nothing on me
Play it Deep
Blue