The Dark Furie

Here's some telltale signs to help you find out.

1) You nip online to check your new stuff while cooking dinner. By the time you've finished the house is a smoking ruin.

2) Your sticky posts take up the entire front page of your blog (mentioning no particular lizards).

3) Someone tells you a joke in real life and you say LOL

4a) You've created your own group and it has more members than Christianity.
4b) And you know them all by their real life first names.

5) People use your friends list to find new friendly people on the site.

6) Your voicemail's outgoing message is "lv msg C2UL"

7) At 9pm you're just about to come offline. The next thing you know it's daylight outside and the birds are singing.

8a) You've posted more than twenty blog posts in one day.
8b) None of them were music, videos or pasted from another site.

9a) Your real life friends complain that you use the internet too much.
9b) So you post on the forums asking for advice on how to make them see how wonderful Opera is.
9c) As well as putting up a blog post about how "they just don't get it."

10a) Your pet is named Doomie71.
10b) Or your first born child.

11a) You know more than one person who's been featured or interviewed.
11b) You've been featured or interviewed yourself.
11c) You've interviewed someone on here.

12a) You've won Opera merchandise.
12b) You've bought Opera merchandise.
12c) More than once.
12d) And wear it everywhere.

13) You've started learning a second language just to talk to more people here.

14a) You've posted more than a thousand forum posts.
14b) This month.
14c) More like this week.

15) You get confused when people offline call you by your real name.

16a) You've fallen asleep while online.
16b) While using Opera Mini. Now you have a phone-screen shaped burn mark in your chest.
16c) And you don't mind telling people how you got it.

17) You come online after a day away and find 312 new, 87 messages waiting for you at the top of your screen.

18a) Someone has added you to their friends list because they think you look nice.
18b) And you've added them back, then joked about them with friends.
18c) Then felt really bad when you notice you're their only friend.

19) You truly believe that the worst scum of the universe are PeOpLe WhO TyPe LiKe ThIs.

20) You've told someone who types all in upper case to "stop shouting".

21a) You've called the Samaritans when My Opera has been down for an hour.
21b) Then set up a group to help other traumatised members when it comes back up.

22a) You have Opera Watch bookmarked and check it everyday to see when the new versions of Desktop, Mobile or Mini are out.
22b) Actually, Opera Watch has you bookmarked and checks everyday...

23a) Your blog has had more than 20,000 visits.
23b) You know because you check everyday.

24) While on the phone to someone you have to do something and you tell them you'll BRB.

25a) You put up a message telling people you're likely to be away for a few days.
25b) Because you've just started giving birth.
25c) And you were online when you conceived.

26) When someone asks you to repeat something they didn't hear properly you tell them to scroll up.

27a) You've spent more than a week working on one blog post to get it just right.
27b) No-one comments on it and that really annoys you.

28) You read in the newspaper about someone being stalked in real life and wonder why they don't just block them and report them to the admin.

29) You stopped noticing other people's typing errors months ago.

30) You've read all of this and now think I'm following you around in real life.