I have to change the tendency here... No more love for a while... I guess it's making me even more sad... Hmmm.... The video has nothing to do with anything... I just like the song
Well... due to a lot of sparetime during Easter, and lack of meaningfull hobbies, I made you a snowman D, just as you asked You know I don't care much for the cold, so I didn't spend more than a couple of minutes. It might not be big or beautiful, but it was made with love...
Today when I woke up, I had a fever and it felt like I had swalloved razorblades without much luck, still does. Why is it that the few times the sun shines in this place, I end up spending the day in bed. Because of Alfred, my faithful and strange dog, I have to go out. But in this state, I'm pretty sure I wont enjoy it much. The thing that bothers me the most is that I'm feeling fine:) In a feverish, sedated kind of way. Maybe it's the coughsirupe my doctor prescribed? I have my suspicions So... this would mean that even if I feel like going out for a run, I probably shouldn't. Fever is usually the only sign that I take serious when it comes to my own personal health. If I have a fever, my body needs to rest. I guess the only thing that helps is some serious bedrest
My friend ones told me that whenever she has a fever and a swollen throat she spends the entire day drinking nothing but vodka, and the next day she always feels fine. Maybe I should follow her excample? Even though I have my doubts. I probably shouldn't I'll get wasted before I've finished the first glass. Not much of a drinker Hmmm... Guess I just have to wait and let the body heal itself. But beeing sick is no fun, and yes, I know it's not suppose to be. But I wish the feeling of restlessness would give me a break for a couple of days, so I'd be able to relax more. I miss having someone to care for me when I'm sick. Maybe thats the thing. I'm not used to beeing alone. In August I packed my things and moved out, a very good idea. Not much of a constructive relationship, not much happiness left you might say. Hmm... guess that's a different story. Not gonna go there now. I probably should crawl back into bed. With the company of my laptop. The only "human" company I keep on theese feverish days. Hope your day is a lot better than mine
A month ago I lost one of my best friends:( Instead of celebrating his 50th, I ended up going to his funeral. Good friends are hard to come by. Not many people are there for you no matter what. Not many people know how to play the banjo either! This scene from the movie Deliverance, contains the song "duelling banjos". I love it... Especially did when he played it for me:) Don't know why, I'm not excactly a banjo-lover, but it just always made me smile Now, it makes me cry Hmmm... This one's in memory of one of the best friends I've ever had. Rest in peace my good friend. I miss you so much Nobody will ever play the banjo for me like you:p....Hmmm... never thought this scene would make me cry...
Today I am really bored beyond belief. I need a hobby... really... The weather is terrible, the rain is poring down... And as always: I MISS THE SUN!!! I am not able to concentrate on anything for more than a few minutes at a time:( Hmmm... what to do, what to do? Just felt like complaining a little bit I hope tommorrow will be bether, I'm sure it will be Well, hope your day is sunny and wonderful Have a nice day
I have a choice to make. I recently realised that I don't earn enough money to manage... For every day that goes by, my debt grows bigger and bigger:worried: I finally got a job that I love, but I cannot work enough hours due to being "overqualified" This is b.s. If I didn't have my qualifications, I could work full time, get payed a little less, but the problem would be solved. But no.... I am getting extremely frustrated because of this. Okay,,, I hate this place, and now I finally got an opportunity to get a job somewhere else, closer to my friends and family. In a place where the sun actually shines (that didn't sound right, but I think you get my drift:D ). I have a contract until April, most likely untill June. But, now I don't know what to do. Why I write this down, you tell me. Somehow I hoped it would make it an easier choice:confused: Hmmm... but no.... I have to try and stay positive, no? Find all the ups, instead of the downs... Well, tomorrow I'm gonna start searching for a job down South again. Move back into the sun:cool: I think I'll be a lot more happy. The more I think about it: I am so lonely in this place. Somehow it never felt like home... I have no idea where home is (I should probably have a qote or some words of wisdom to tell myself:D ). I am tired of being restless, not quite knowing what the next tide will bring. I guess in time the pieces will fall into place. I just have to be patient and so on and so on... Hmmm... okay... not gonna finish this any time soon... so...
This case has a lot more sides to it than it seems, but...