Words are poor healers
Saturday, 9. February 2008, 11:52:00
The funeral for Tony's father has been set for this coming Wednesday, the 13th. I'll be heading down, as will Austen and Claire, both also resident here in Aberdeen, while Andrew and another of our circle, Jamie, will be travelling up from Hawick and Coldstream respectively.
I phoned Tony on Wednesday to pass on my condolences. I almost wish I hadn't because hearing Tony speak, hearing the borderline hysteria in his voice, hearing the titanic effort he was making to keep himself from falling to pieces while he dealt with the horrible organisational details of his father's sudden death...hearing that nearly broke my heart. It must be the worst feeling in the world to lose someone that close to you but it is also tremendously difficult to know what to say to someone who this has happened to, especially if you haven't suffered a similar loss yourself. There literally are no words that don't sound trite, hollow, or otherwise completely meaningless. How can mere words help overcome a pain of this depth, this magnitude?
All you can do, absolutely the only thing you can possibly manage...is to try to be there, wether that person needs you or not.
So yes, we're all going to meet in Perth on the 13th and do our best to be there for him. To give him the very best of our love in the hope that he can take some small comfort from it.
What else can we do?
I phoned Tony on Wednesday to pass on my condolences. I almost wish I hadn't because hearing Tony speak, hearing the borderline hysteria in his voice, hearing the titanic effort he was making to keep himself from falling to pieces while he dealt with the horrible organisational details of his father's sudden death...hearing that nearly broke my heart. It must be the worst feeling in the world to lose someone that close to you but it is also tremendously difficult to know what to say to someone who this has happened to, especially if you haven't suffered a similar loss yourself. There literally are no words that don't sound trite, hollow, or otherwise completely meaningless. How can mere words help overcome a pain of this depth, this magnitude?
All you can do, absolutely the only thing you can possibly manage...is to try to be there, wether that person needs you or not.
So yes, we're all going to meet in Perth on the 13th and do our best to be there for him. To give him the very best of our love in the hope that he can take some small comfort from it.
What else can we do?
WIDGETIZE
Rhona Kirsten # 9. February 2008, 12:44
I've never had anyone close to me die, I'm not looking forward to it.
kirsten # 9. February 2008, 12:44