The Little Things
Friday, 5. September 2008, 12:20:23
"It's always the little things that end a relationship", popular wisdom tells us. While the big issues bring you together, help you grow as a couple, it's the little issues that nip and bite and tear at you until you can take no more and throwing kitchen utensils at each other becomes your only means of communication.
Case in point: my girlfriend squeezes her toothpaste tube from the middle. Worse, when she stays over at mine she forgets to bring her own so squeezes MY toothpaste tube from the middle.
I squeeze from the end as my father taught me to do when I was barely tall enough to reach the sink. "Roll the tube up from the bottom, Son" he said, in that fatherly way that is the Voice of God to many small children "This way you don't waste any, see?" Of course this was back in the days when toothpaste came in metal tubes and you could genuinely roll it tightly starting from the lip at the bottom, but the principle hasn't changed.
Squeezing from the middle just creates mess.
Squeezing from the middle wastes toothpaste, and makes the tube look all gunky and horrible at the cap-end. And you then have to perform tube gymnastics to get the stuff back up from the bottom that you've been packing down that end by squeezing in the middleohmygodwhywhywhywouldyoudothis!
Solution: I'm going to buy her her own tube for when she stays over, neatly side-stepping the growing urge to deprive her of oxygen as she sleeps.
Current Mood: Bemused at the sensation of Love and Murder mingled together.
Case in point: my girlfriend squeezes her toothpaste tube from the middle. Worse, when she stays over at mine she forgets to bring her own so squeezes MY toothpaste tube from the middle.
I squeeze from the end as my father taught me to do when I was barely tall enough to reach the sink. "Roll the tube up from the bottom, Son" he said, in that fatherly way that is the Voice of God to many small children "This way you don't waste any, see?" Of course this was back in the days when toothpaste came in metal tubes and you could genuinely roll it tightly starting from the lip at the bottom, but the principle hasn't changed.
Squeezing from the middle just creates mess.
Squeezing from the middle wastes toothpaste, and makes the tube look all gunky and horrible at the cap-end. And you then have to perform tube gymnastics to get the stuff back up from the bottom that you've been packing down that end by squeezing in the middleohmygodwhywhywhywouldyoudothis!Solution: I'm going to buy her her own tube for when she stays over, neatly side-stepping the growing urge to deprive her of oxygen as she sleeps.
Current Mood: Bemused at the sensation of Love and Murder mingled together.
WIDGETIZE
GoldBug # 5. September 2008, 16:30
galadriel # 7. September 2008, 01:44
Grant, you must be soooo old! Since when did toothpaste come in a METAL tube?!
Maybe it's a guy thing to squeeze it from the end. I squeeze it from the middle, or the top, then when it gets emptire, I squeeze it from the end. But there is never any of this rolling up the end business.
LadyArtane # 7. September 2008, 03:33
what if the tube gets squeezed in the middle until it is going empty and then from the bottom? (ducks in case of having utensils thrown my way)
GrantTLC # 7. September 2008, 11:22
Originally posted by Kimbers:
Oh, gee, thanks, Kim. Make me cry twice in one day, willya?
*throws can opener at LadyArtane*
*misses*
GoldBug # 7. September 2008, 19:10
galadriel # 7. September 2008, 22:58
GrantTLC # 8. September 2008, 06:25
GoldBug # 8. September 2008, 18:31
galadriel # 9. September 2008, 13:12
galadriel # 9. September 2008, 13:14
GoldBug # 9. September 2008, 15:14
kirstycat # 9. September 2008, 22:21
Does that make me old too then?
I think it must be a girl/boy thing, on how best to squeeze your toothpaste. Most women don't really care about it, and squeeze from the middle of the tube, and most men seem to fret about squeezing the tube from the end! Personally I don't see what all the fuss is about! It doesn't really matter does it?
I get one of those toothpaste pump things too though (colgate sensitive, because the toothpaste is pink!
GoldBug # 10. September 2008, 07:24
kirstycat # 10. September 2008, 08:11
GrantTLC # 10. September 2008, 09:47
NOTHING will happen today except a lot of over-excited journalism. They don't start smashing particles together for another month and they don't do the 'scary' hi-energy stuff until NEXT blimmin' YEAR.
Load of fuss and plaver about sweet fanny adams.
GoldBug # 10. September 2008, 09:53
GrantTLC # 10. September 2008, 09:54
GoldBug # 10. September 2008, 14:40
GrantTLC # 10. September 2008, 14:50
GoldBug # 10. September 2008, 15:45
GrantTLC # 10. September 2008, 15:55
LadyArtane # 11. September 2008, 06:46
GrantTLC # 11. September 2008, 08:08
*misses again*
LadyArtane # 13. September 2008, 04:38
alrighty then try this....everyone in the world has their own things they are "anal" about no matter how weird others think this might be....
so sit down with the lady and say, this [toothpaste squeezing] is my anal thing..now what is one of your anal things...and then trade the I won't do it agains with her
I'm either extremely brilliant or ......no..I'll stay with brilliant
GrantTLC # 13. September 2008, 07:13
This is good advice, although every time I use the word Anal around my girlfriend she gets this look of horror/outrage and starts wordlessly hitting me...I've tried to tell her that the word 'anal' has a few meanings, and if I wanted that I'd call it 'botty-stabbing' but she just won't listen; I think it's some kind of female defence mechanism, or something.
Can I have my pizza-slice back? (You can keep the can-opener, I have more)
LadyArtane # 13. September 2008, 19:41
My pizza!! Mine!!
Heh, I tend to forget my American-isms...try obsessive hatred instead
And no, not a female defense mechanism, at least, not to some of us
GrantTLC # 14. September 2008, 08:44
LadyArtane # 15. September 2008, 10:17