The Little Things
Friday, 5. September 2008, 12:20:23
"It's always the little things that end a relationship", popular wisdom tells us. While the big issues bring you together, help you grow as a couple, it's the little issues that nip and bite and tear at you until you can take no more and throwing kitchen utensils at each other becomes your only means of communication.
Case in point: my girlfriend squeezes her toothpaste tube from the middle. Worse, when she stays over at mine she forgets to bring her own so squeezes MY toothpaste tube from the middle.
I squeeze from the end as my father taught me to do when I was barely tall enough to reach the sink. "Roll the tube up from the bottom, Son" he said, in that fatherly way that is the Voice of God to many small children "This way you don't waste any, see?" Of course this was back in the days when toothpaste came in metal tubes and you could genuinely roll it tightly starting from the lip at the bottom, but the principle hasn't changed.
Squeezing from the middle just creates mess.
Squeezing from the middle wastes toothpaste, and makes the tube look all gunky and horrible at the cap-end. And you then have to perform tube gymnastics to get the stuff back up from the bottom that you've been packing down that end by squeezing in the middleohmygodwhywhywhywouldyoudothis!
Solution: I'm going to buy her her own tube for when she stays over, neatly side-stepping the growing urge to deprive her of oxygen as she sleeps.
Current Mood: Bemused at the sensation of Love and Murder mingled together.
Case in point: my girlfriend squeezes her toothpaste tube from the middle. Worse, when she stays over at mine she forgets to bring her own so squeezes MY toothpaste tube from the middle.
I squeeze from the end as my father taught me to do when I was barely tall enough to reach the sink. "Roll the tube up from the bottom, Son" he said, in that fatherly way that is the Voice of God to many small children "This way you don't waste any, see?" Of course this was back in the days when toothpaste came in metal tubes and you could genuinely roll it tightly starting from the lip at the bottom, but the principle hasn't changed.
Squeezing from the middle just creates mess.
Squeezing from the middle wastes toothpaste, and makes the tube look all gunky and horrible at the cap-end. And you then have to perform tube gymnastics to get the stuff back up from the bottom that you've been packing down that end by squeezing in the middleohmygodwhywhywhywouldyoudothis!Solution: I'm going to buy her her own tube for when she stays over, neatly side-stepping the growing urge to deprive her of oxygen as she sleeps.
Current Mood: Bemused at the sensation of Love and Murder mingled together.
WIDGETIZE