海龟浮上海面

Eve got bored in the Garden of Eden. She was not quite of herself, in a superfluous territory that did not seem REAL to her. She felt isolated and desolate in a somewhere of nowhere.

She wanted to be advanced into the untouchables, preferred to get herself lost in the actuality and reality of life that were challenging, substantial, and would lead her to an unknown horizon, a new plain of living where nothing conformed to what she had been repeatedly experiencing in this paradisal "heaven-on-earth".

She loved Adam, deeply, perhaps more than she was loved. She was not sure if he loved her the way she did. But there was one thing she was sure of, their unity of love - REAL LOVE - would vanquish and triumph over anything that hindered their way to eternity.

Adam was passionate in his devotion to the pleasure of being with her. But she felt only being wanted, not loved - head to toe but without a sole, not with whole body and soul.

One day, Eve told Adam what she had been thinking lately and asked if he could take her to somewhere they could adventure into the unreachables, to know more of the unknown. Adam said he knew nowhere besides Eden and wondered if there was a place better than Eden.

'It's not a matter of good or bad. It's the course that matters,' she said. He found himself lost in the midst of the unrecognizable words she uttered. 'What course, good or bad?' he asked in puzzlement.

'Let's leave Eden, anywhere will do. I felt upset here. Every day is like a today. Let's experience something new, something different, TOGETHER. I can't do it without you. I don't want to do this without YOU.'

He was in some sort of perplexity, yet he felt being loved and wanted. His cognition on her multiplied. His own SELF rose, extended and magnified. She seemed like a MIRROR to him, reflecting something in the deepest side of his consciousness, the unknown soil of ignorance where it was cornered, buried waiting to be found, stimulated and enlightened.

'I wish I know some where besides Eden. I'll definitely be with you wherever you go. I remember our Father once told me not to try the forbidden fruit on the "Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil", otherwise we'll be expelled from Eden. Maybe that's a way out.' Adam seemed to have made up his mind.

They then shared the 'risk' - the Apples and soon were out of Eden, setting off for a new voyage of HUMAN exploration, without any regret.

Maybe there was not a serpent who seduced Eve to the apples, or there was no forbidden fruit of any sort at all, and it was just the manifestation of MEN's will which had subconsciously followed the directorship of our Almighty Father.

Maybe it was not a matter of "Disobedience and Expulsion", but rather "Curiosity and Advancement" which symbolized The Breakdown of MEN and The Rise of HU-MAN.

Maybe we Human were not borne by the Original Sin. The Judgement Day will just be the day when we are finally uniting ourselves as ONE.

Eden is dead, long live Eden.


Further Reading:

1. Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil - Wikipedia
   
2. In God, Distrust
   
3. God Is Not Great
   
4. 易中天:上帝之谜——《上帝的预谋》

A summer day was beginning to draw to a close. The sun had lost its warmth and was retreating to a far distance, yet increasing in size. It was a Sunday with barely any significance.

Two women in their late twenties were sitting outside a cafeteria which cornered at a crossroads. Low traffic flow had made the location a most pleasant escape at this time of the season. As the end of the afternoon approached, the descending sun was painting the early summer dusk into a romantic scene of unforgetfulness.

A heavy, copper-colored beam of light came in from the west, gilding the outline of Marianne's profile with red gold, and projecting on the wall beside in an abounding, ruddy illumination. At the other side, Fanny was watching with withholding impulsion.

'What?' Marianne recognized that she had been catching her with her eyes for some times. 'You look beautifully there.' Fanny was enjoying the moment, deeply.

'Don't you make a fool of me.' 'Why?' said Fanny, 'You are. And always will be, in my mind.'

'I've lost confidence in myself. Don't just bring it up for the sake of pleasing me. But I thank you, anyway.' Marianne shattered with a smile, naturally.

'You're always in a mix of diffidence and confidence. I just couldn't tell which is you. I love the feeling of cheering you on, though.'

'It really struck me. The downside of me always takes me over and sinks me into dark bewilderment. I must have a split personality. Don't you think so? But who doesn't? Do you?'

'I don't know. Do you find me that way too? Well, maybe that's why we can get acquaintance with each other this easily. We at least share this in common.' Fanny was defending.

'I think most people don't have a consistency in their personality, especially for some Zodiac. Scorpians in particular. You're a Scorpian, aren't you?'

'Yes, we both are. You know that.' A pause. Marianna let the conversation cool.

She had found Fanny acted a bit eccentric lately, yet pleasing. There were times when they talked about the subject of relationship, she used to dexterously flip to something else, sometimes quite awkward.

It actually was not Marianne's favorable subject of conversation, after she had split off with her boyfriend a month ago. She was glad that Fanny often came to her rescue whenever she needed it. Sometimes, voluntarily. It seemed that she was in possession of some kind of magic power that could heal wounds. She was happy to have her in company. And the feeling seemed to grow.

'Shall we go somewhere else, and carry on with the day,' she said with a tone of laziness.

'Isn't it too early for dinner?' Fanny was sniffing the air. She was very sensitive to scents, and swift in understanding them. 'I like it here. Only if you insist.' 'Not the least. I like it here too.' There was a pause.

'Shall we try something new after dinner?' suggested Fanny. 'What do you mean by NEW?' Marianne answered curiously. 'Have you ever been to a gay bar?' 'Never cross my mind with that idea. Have you?' Her curiosity grew.

The sun was yellow and low, sinking down, and in the sky floated a pale, ineffectual moon. The city slowly faded away, and lost her colors. Yet, her dynamism was accumulating.

It's nice to have friends around, a lot of them.

Not because I hate being lonely. As a matter of fact, I enjoy staying all by myself behind four empty walls, without windows, even door. Sort of being in a cell, without knowing who put me there, or why.

Who wouldn't have friends? Everbody does.

Friends aren't to be picked. We encounter. We're strangers to each other the first time, the second time we'll be friends. I keep a broad meaning about friends. But, I adopt a narrow meaning about "close friends". For "intimate friends", even narrower.

It's nice also to have a lot of girlfriends. Remind you that I'm male.

Girlfriends, I mean both girlfriends and "girlfriends". Boyfriends, I mean boyfriends and "boyfriends". Don't be mistaken. I ain't bi-sexual. I make love only to girls. But, it's nice also to have intimate boyfriends.

You probably know what "intimate" usually means, especially for girlfriends in my case.

People use to equivalent intimacy with sex when we talk about friends with the opposite sex.

When we talk about girls' intimacy, we normally suggest that they're those who could open their hearts and share things with each other, even share the same bed. Sex isn't in the relationship. If it does, it's an exception rather than the rule.

It isn't the case for boys.

Intimacy isn't a word to describe boys' relationship. Brotherhood does. If we did use it to describe a boy-boy relation, we normally mean they're gay. For me, it isn't the case.

Politics is in our "intimate" relationship. Politics in the real sense.

I don't have a lot of "intimate" boyfriends. For intimate girlfriends, I do, one at a time of course.

Further Reading:

1. Philosophy and Raking (extract from City of Laughter by Vic Gatrell)

在这世上,如果还有矢志不渝的爱情的话,我敢说绝对不会是多数。电影中童话般的浪漫爱情故事,之所以能够打动人心,皆因在现实生活中绝无仅有。纯情小说中郎才女貌佳偶天成的描写,亦只是作者对现实出於良好意愿的美丽折射,无中生有地制造出一批又一批依靠幻想来逃离现实自我陶醉的追随者。

沐浴在爱情的海洋中的男女,都认为自己对对方已付出了百分百的感情,下意识地希望对方亦能全程投入,其实不无例外地,他们最爱的只是自己。每个人内心深处都有一个情感的秘密花园,默默地苦心经营,不轻易让人进入,任意践踏。但却想尽办法非要进入对方的不可。

曾经有个说法,说人们如果能够彼此分享心中的秘密,可以有助拉近人与人之间的距离。但是,一旦进入两性关系的领域,这种一厢情愿的说教,往往导使当事人打开不应打开的情感的秘密花园的大门,把他们已经岌岌可危的爱情,从悬崖边再往外推。

或许这就是传统智慧:“因了解而分手”所隐含的精髓所在。当一对曾经爱得死去活来的恋人作出分离决择的时候,他们应该是最清醒的。因为他们终於真正做到了相互了解。

但是,这是他们想要的结局吗?

在这个情感的私人花园里匿藏的究竟是什么秘密,人人各有不同,但最好还是留给自己,不要轻易分享。

爱情绝对应该是自私的。

“亲爱的,你应该为自己着想,多结识几个男朋友。”

“为什么?”

“不为什么,只因我爱你!”

“你是不是还有很多女朋友?”

“我今生将只爱你一人。”

“你没有正面回答我。但愿你所说的是真的。”

“我在认识你后,已没有再跟以前的女朋友联络了,况且她们也不想再和我接触。”

“你要我结识多几个男朋友,那你自己为什么不这样做?”

“我说过了,皆因我爱你。我不需要再结识新的女孩子,因我认为你已是我心目中最好的了。”

“你说我是最好的,那为什么还要我去认识别的男孩子?”

“我爱你,所以希望你开心、幸福。我怕我不是你最好的男人,你需要多些选择。你还年轻。”

“我不理解。你口口声声说爱我,但又要我多结识男孩子,你不吃醋吗?”

“你如果过得开心、幸福,我为什么要吃醋?”

“你不怕我真的爱上别人吗?”

“你要是爱上别人,就说明你跟我在一起时,你感到不开心不快乐。假如你真是那样,我会祝福你。但无论如何,你仍是我心中的至爱。”

“我觉得你是在试探我,看我是不是还和别的男孩子交往。又或者是:你与我过腻了,又不好对我说。你是不是想我自动离开你,要跟别的女孩子好?要是这样,你直说就是了,何必转弯抹角,还官冕堂煌的说是为了我好…”

“我完全没有你所说的意图,你只能相信我。我只是怕担搁你的青春,日后你后悔,到时才重新结识新的,可选择的男孩子会比现在少得多。”

“你不要为我担心。我认为你已是我认识中的男孩子中最好的了。”

“你这么年轻,不结识多些怎么知道我是最好的?你应该给自己多些选择机会。我不像你,我经历多了,兜兜转转多年才认识你,所以我很珍惜你,很爱你,希望你开心快乐,与我在一起时有幸福的感觉。”

“我觉得你很矛盾。你让我感到永远幸福不就行了吗?所必说这些多余的话,我怀疑你的真正意图是很自然的事。”

“我一定会尽我所能令你幸福的。你是否开心快乐,我亦会感觉到。你怀疑我也没有办法,我说的都是直白的话,没有其它隐藏的意图。”