Lovin', is what I got

DAY THREE HUNDRED SIXTY FOUR:
(should be 365, don't know where I fucked up)

Here it is,
The End.

A year later, here we are and so many beautiful things have changed.
I got myself out of the sort of unhappiness that I figured would follow me my entire life. Webber did nothing but bring out the worst in me and make me realize that I really needed to focus on finding out who I really am. I've learned so much and experienced so much about the world that has opened my eyes and finally made me excited to be something and do something and explore everything. I'm sad to end this blog but happy that I've kept to my goal of making it an entire year. I've committed to something and seen it through til the end which is what I plan on doing with all of my new ventures through life. The most important thing I've found in this year, is my new love. Someone who I can actually be myself around and accepts me for who I am, and vice verse. I've always tried my best to appear as whoever fit at the time and now I'm ME. And he loves ME. This couldn't have been a more pivotal year in my life to documented. I literally feel as though I've gone from a scared, lost girl to an adult. I've seen the change in myself from my personality, to my confidence, and even my thoughts and actions.





Last Valentines Day was nothing like today.
Today was perfection.
Catered dinner for two at his house with no one home.
Heart shaped chicken fettuccine Alfredo with salad and cheesecake for desert.
Candles & gifts & cards.
The most mouth watering chocolate I've ever had.

& most importantly,
my love.
<3

DAY THREE HUNDRED SIXTY TWO:

Got enough mthdon* to make it through the week and get it out of our system.
CROSSING MY FINGERS.

DAY THREE HUNDRED FIFTY EIGHT:

These past three days weren't even worth documenting.
It was our 5 months which makes me sooo happy but it was also filled with spending too much money on things I shouldn't have spent so much money on.

It sucks that on the last leg of this thing I fucked up three days but there are plans in effect for that to change.

DAY THREE HUNDRED FIFTY SIX:

We took the suboxine strip that Ashley left in my purse today and it helped for most of the day.
It was nice not to think about it all damn day.

We ended up at Walmart after he got off work and I bought this thing for my car.
Every keeps telling me it's soooo small and blah blah blah so I thought it was funny because the reason I get SUCH good gas mileage and the reason I LOVE it sooo much is cause it's small.

So size DOES matter.


Overall good day.

DAY THREE HUNDRED FIFTY FOUR:

We were supposed to go to Bok Tower tonight to see the Carillon concert but he had wanted to go shopping for some new clothes. We really couldn't do anything because I had homework due and it just wasn't going to happen. We probably could have made Bok Tower cause it wouldn't have taken up the whole night but regardless of all that, it turned out to be a horrible night.'

You never want to do any

You dictate everything we do

We don't need to see each other tomorrow

I have to beg you to get any

Can you take me to Sam

I was so hurt.
This is more of a problem on his behalf than I even realized.
I felt like maybe he was just using me to get the things he wanted in his life.
& now I was controlling to much of the process.

I'm just trying to look out for us...