My OperaA Eulogy for Christopher
Sunday, August 29, 2010 5:13:14 PM
On July 30 2010 my dearest friend Christopher Burgess died from some kind of internal hemorrhaging related to leukemia. He only knew that he had cancer for about seven months, I only knew for four.
This past month I have been walking around in a daze and I knew that I wasn't dealing with the actual reality of what had happened, my brain just buried most of the emotions at some point. I haven't posted the eulogy that my wife and I wrote for him or anything yet, but last night I got an email from an old friend of his that hadn't seen him in years. The process of explaining the situation to her was horribly depressing and managed to force me to look at what has happened. Unfortunately this also triggered a night full of dreams that I was crying, and possibly crying in my sleep.
This past month I have been walking around in a daze and I knew that I wasn't dealing with the actual reality of what had happened, my brain just buried most of the emotions at some point. I haven't posted the eulogy that my wife and I wrote for him or anything yet, but last night I got an email from an old friend of his that hadn't seen him in years. The process of explaining the situation to her was horribly depressing and managed to force me to look at what has happened. Unfortunately this also triggered a night full of dreams that I was crying, and possibly crying in my sleep.
Right after I heard of his passing I went into memory preservation mode and set up this memorial. I still need to write an official opening message to any more friends and family that might stumble across it. I honestly didn't think that anyone would find it without any real information on it. I wanted to get it a bit more ready before I told his family. If anyone else finds it though, I wanted it to be a place where we could come and share Chris memorabilia and post our memories of him and all of that kind of thing.
The following is the text of our eulogy for Christopher:
I want to give my condolences to Shirley Burgess and Christopher's family.
I learned of his passing just less than a week ago now and I am still in shock. It hasn't sunk in yet that one of the kindest, most unique people that I've known has passed away. I keep expecting a phone call or email saying "Hey John. What are you up to?"
Chris was my best friend and my wife Sonja's also. She actually met him first, years ago when he sent her a message online because he had found a list of my wife's favorite movies and noticed that she was in Tulsa too. After a few online conversations we all found that we shared similar taste in most things and decided to meet at a movie theatre. I still remember one of the first things that my wife said to him was "Wow! You're tall!"
He quickly became like a brother to us. On most weekends he would come over and we would all watch movies that he'd brought and play video games. I've never met anyone else with such an encyclopedic knowledge of unusual movies.
Chris was also one of the most intelligent and observant people that I've known. The great majority of society would probably say that he was immature and too sensitive, but he could tell at a glance if something was weighing on your mind. He had the ability to listen and not judge you, which is a true gift.
Unfortunately he never seemed to give himself the credit that he deserved. He was always humble and would tend to shrug off compliments. I hope that at some point it had gotten through his head what a great guy that we thought he really was.
One of the things that I will miss the most about him is his almost childlike enthusiasm for playing around. We have several supermarket dart guns, rubber balls, and Halloween toys scattered about the house. I don't know how many hours we spent running around and acting like kids. I think that one day he would have been a really great father.
A hundred memories of our time with him keep popping up; the time we ordered food from a guy he met at a Quik Trip called 'James the Pizza Man'; or when we spent Thanksgiving at my house a few years ago; and all the nights that we sat up till the morning playing video games.
He was also a very private person, and he only rarely ever told me much about his life. When he did though, he let you see what a truly kind and gentle person that he was. There are still many things that I don't know about him that I wanted to ask. I wish that I could have been a better friend to him.
He loved his family deeply and I know that they will miss him.
I do.
