Mewing from the Crypt

My last rant sparked an interesting conversation about semantics, so let's dive into the substance of the matter: What's to be done about piracy? Specifically, what should lawmakers do and which pitfalls should they avoid?

I feel very strongly that consumers' rights and privacy concerns should not be sacrificed because some media giants can't get ancient business models to work in a modern economy. They need to face the reality that maybe they just can't reap the profits they used to anymore if the old models aren't sustainable with the arrival of new technology. It's not the business of lawmakers to protect outdated means of making money, especially not though attempts to make said technology useless. I'm reminded of the ridiculously low speed limits (walking speed) of cars in London in the early 20th century, laws which were passed after horse cab drivers complained they would be put out of business.

Now, artists need to be able to make a living, otherwise there'd be no art. This should be possible with sensible copyright legislation. I think that both the artists and the community can well afford copyrights to expire a little sooner than they do today, though. Apart from that, the following should be 100% legal:

• Downloading something you already own in a different format (possibly excluding subscription based services for obvious reasons)
• Downloading something not available for legal purchase in your region (which has the beneficial side effect of making the appalling region system useless)
• Downloading something to try before you buy - IF no legal and convenient way to do so exists (a free ad-financed subscription would fit under "convenient" here, even though I'm no fan of ads as such).

Additionally, sharing with friends and family should be both possible and legal, as well as reselling or giving something away once you're done with it, the same way you can do with physical media. I am 100% against DRM, though - if I bought it, I demand the ability to create backups and to play the media in any way I wish. One restriction I would accept though, and this one answers both concerns in this paragraph: Only one copy of the product can be played at once. This is reasonable. But locking the content to my computer and/or media player is an absolute no-no.

Subscription-based solutions are probably the future, but the option to buy and keep a copy should remain. Under no circumstances ever should anything be deleted from my hard drive without my consent.

I'm convinced the willingness to pay for digital content is still there, and won't vanish entirely if the media industry starts spending more time figuring out better business models and less time playing legislators and private investigators at once. For consumers and artists, there are good solutions that don't require constant surveillance and draconian laws. The middle layer could use some trimming of the fat, though - it's not surprising that certain companies want to remain in absolute control of distribution so consumers can't buy directly from artists, but they need to lose, or everyone else will.

I'm convinced good business models will keep the industry thriving and make surveillance and super-strict copyright laws unnecessary. If, however, the industry gets its way in its "war on piracy", I fear these business models won't survive, piracy will run rampant, citizens will hold copyright law in contempt and the whole thing will end in an absolute shitstorm of lawsuits and bankruptcies.

The Captain entered the Control Room, and every crewman present snapped to attention.
"At ease", replied the Captain, sat down in his chair, scratched his dog affectionally behind the ears. The crewmen busied themselves with screens, controls. "Are all the warheads mounted?" The crewman to the far left responded in the affirmative.
"By now", continued the Captain, "we are so far along that our destination will be revealed at last." The crewmen who weren't too busy turned around to listen attentively. "It is the planet Evergreen. We are to rain destruction upon the town of..." He searched his mind. "Moose Crossing." Odd name for a settlement. Odder still, a crewman raised his hand. It was the new guy.
"Let's save the questions for after the briefing, shall we?" suggested the Captain. But the new guy said: "This really can't wait, Captain."
"Very well," the Captain replied. "But I suggest you make your explanation for this interruption phenomenally good."
"Well," said the new guy, as if unsure of how to proceed. "I think you should be aware that there is a conflict of interest involved. Moose Crossing was where I grew up. My family still lives there."
"Oh," said the captain. "That does indeed complicate things."
"I would imagine it does, yes," agreed the new guy.
"Naturally I am partly to blame for putting you in this predicament," said the Captain after the smallest of pauses. "I should have taken the time to do background checks before hiring additional men. I take it you object to the mission objective being the bombing of, among other things, your family?"
"Naturally."
"Naturally."
There was another pause.
"If I may offer a suggestion," said the new guy.
"Please do," the Captain replied.
"The mission objective, it is the town of Moose Crossing itself, correct?"
"You heard me the first time." It was apparent that the Captain's patience, while not at an end, was not infinite either.
"I mean, is that what the order said exactly?"
"Pirates don't take orders," the Captain scoffed.
"My apologies. The bargain, I mean."
"The bargain specified quite clearly the town of Moose Crossing, yes. Where are you headed with this?"
"Did it specify you also had to bomb its citizens?"
The Captain blinked, smiled, then burst into a deep, hearty laughter. The new guy, somewhat encouraged with this reaction, let him finish before asking again.
"It did not," was the response. "General Repo is a heartless bastard, but it looks like he didn't see the need to be that specific." The Captain let fly another tiny chuckle. "Guess he doesn't deal with pirates on a regular basis."
"So," continued the new guy, "if someone were to warn the citizens so they could evacuate the city, you'd still be carrying out your... end of the bargain to the letter, correct?"
"Indeed," said the Captain. "However, I cannot allow this to happen. There is a specific reason I chose the city of Moose Crossing to glass. They normally don't let you choose, but when I offered a slight discount on the payment and threatened to walk out if I didn't get my way, Repo let me have it."
"What reason would this be, Captain?"
"A woman that goes by the name of Frida Turmoil. I want her dead by any means. And from your reaction I see you know her?"
"She's my mother," confessed the new guy. "How badly do you want her dead?"
"Desperately and without delay."
"It would appear we are at a bit of an impasse, then."
"Indeed," said the Captain, shaking his head with regret. "This is a shame, is what it is. I can't expect you to kill your own mother on my orders and keep serving on my crew, and I'm sure you understand I can't leave you alive to exact vengeance upon my person later."
"Actually, I don't mind that much." This caused a surprised murmur among the other crewmen that the Captain ended with a stern look. "My mother being killed, I mean. I'd prefer to not do the actual killing myself, though. And naturally I'd be open to other options, but I can see there's no dissuading you."
The Captain was not convinced. "Are you saying that you're not objecting to my killing your mother in cold blood?"
"Not really. Truth be told, it'd be a mercy killing. My mother is far from in perfect health. More to the point, she has contracted a disease that is slowly draining her of life in the most painful way imaginable. It's painful even to watch. If you had conducted your background check as you said, you'd have known why I left home for a life of piracy."
"A likely story," snorted the Captain. "I suppose you expect me to spare her, then?"
"It won't matter much anyway unless we can evacuate the city. Though if I may be so bold: Since it seems that this is a personal matter, Captain, would you not rather see her death up close, in person?"
"Leaving the Pure Heart without a commanding officer? I hardly think so."
"After the bombing, then? I'd still prefer the rest of my family to survive the day, and once their town is reduced to a smoking sheet of glass, they would probably want transportation elsewhere."
"You bring up a good point." The Captain got up and started pacing back and forth in front of his chair. "As I said, though, Repo is a bastard of humongous proportions, but I'd still have to pay him back his advance as a matter of honor. Naturally, this would have to be done anonymously so he does not become aware that we have violated the spirit of the bargain. The question then becomes, are you willing to compensate myself and the rest of the crew?"
"I can offer you the satisfaction of seeing my mother die close up. She'll know you ended her life, and not just be snuffed out in her sleep."
The Captain took a minute to consider this one more time.
"What say the rest of you?" he then asked the rest of the crew present.
"I don't much like giving up the pay," said one. "It would come in handy."
"I just don't think we can trust the new guy enough," said another. "No offense."
"None taken," said the new guy. "I suppose I could give up my share of booty until the debt is paid, but as you say, the trust issue kind of makes that a moot point."
"Not even for twice the pay would I cross General Repo," said a third crewman. "Vengeance fuels him. He's good at it, too."
"Let's just assume for a moment," the new guy interjected, "that you trust me enough to agree with this. If you send me and two other crewmen ahead of us to evacuate the city - that would be one to kill my mother and the other to make sure I didn't pull anything - and then bomb it. Afterwards, we take on board the survivors and the General will be none the wiser."
"That could work," said the Captain. "Repo wants the planet rid of all sentient life, and your suggestion would certainly accomplish that."
"But we can't very well stuff them all in the cargo hold," said the second-in-command, the same crewman who had voiced his trust issues earlier. "We'd have to dump the cargo at the very least, and unless it's an unusually small town, the supplies as well."
"I expect this would add to my debt considerably, then," said the new guy, for the first time looking truly discouraged.
"Certainly more than your salary would pay in a lifetime," said the second-in-command, apologetically.
"Damn."
"You can say that again," said the Captain. "I think we're running out of options here."
"How about just my family, then? Except my mother, of course." The new guy was starting to sound ever so slightly desperate.
"You don't think they'll be upset about me killing your mother and all their neighbors?"
"If we put them in the brig, they can't pull anything funny. Come to think of it, you'll probably want to put me there as well. Pretend I'm your captive and call it a coincidence. Stranger things have happened."
"What will we do with them afterward, though?"
"Well... I'm a bit reluctant to bring this up, but I'm fairly sure normal procedure would be selling them as slaves."
"Your own family?"
"It beats being dead."
"But still!" The Captain was visibly amused. "Would you not at least want to buy their freedom?"
"Well, I suppose. If it comes off my pay, it would be a possibility. Provided you would allow it, of course."
"That would actually be possible to pay off within a lifetime," the second-in-command offered.
"I'm a little concerned about your loyalty, though," said the Captain. "Would you really want to work for the man who murdered your mother and bombed your hometown to pay off a debt instituted by the same man so as to not make him enslave your remaining family members?"
"Well, when you put it like that... it still beats the alternatives."
There was another pause. "I'll consider it," the Captain said at the end of it. "You'll have my answer within the hour, and if you do anything you're not supposed to in the meantime I'll kill you and your family dies too."
"Naturally," said the new guy, with relief. "Thank you. You won't regret this."
"I'd quit while I was ahead if I were you," replied the Captain. "Back to your post, now."
The new guy obeyed, and fifty-seven minutes later he had his answer.