On Many Subjects

Friend: Halloween sucks.
Me: Why would you say that?
F: Because only kids get the candy.
Me: If you want candy you can buy it, you know.
F: Not the same thing.
Me: Wny not?
F: It tastes better when its free.
Me: Here, take this piece.
F: Great! Very yummy. Except I don't like starlight mints.
Me: Then why did you take it from me?
F: To remind me how fun Halloween used to be. It was kinda like Trick-or-Treat.
Me: Very weird. And you aren't wearing a costume and you didn't say Trick-or-Treat.
F: Halloween sucks. And now, I am depressed, too. I just wanna be a kid again.
Me: Wait a few years and Alzheimer's may give you your wish.
F: Good point.