My own self

Loki's sensible nonsense of nonsensical sense

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The lawyer and the rats

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On October 17, 1521, French lawyer Barthélémy Chassanée honed his legal skills by defending his most unusual clients -- rats that had ravaged a barley crop earlier that year. In Autun, France, the farmers were out for revenge, but not surprisingly the "defendants" failed to appear, prompting Chassanée to argue that the summons was invalid because it failed to have been served on all the rats. After another summons was issued, Chassanée pleaded cleverly that "evilly-disposed cats" owned by the prosecutors had kept his clients from appearing through intimidation, for which he demanded a bond guaranteeing the rats safe passage to court. When prosecutors refused to provide such an assurance the judge had no choice but to dismiss the absurd charges.

The first recorded animal trial -- that of a hive of bees that had severely stung a man -- took place in 864.

- Jeffrey Kacirk in "Saturday 17 October / Sunday 18 October",
in Forgotten English - A 365-Day Calendar of Vanishing Vocabulary and Folklore for 2009.

The colorfol Mr. Rucevelt

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Theodore Roosevelt [...] attempted to alter the spelling of several hundred words according to guidelines of the Simplified Spelling Board in 1906. He annoyed Congress by ordering the Government Printing Office to begin using his revised spelling in official documents. The public also reacted cynically, much as it had toward Benjamin Franklin's 1768 Scheme for a New Alphabet and Reformed Mode of Spelling. [...] [The press] taunted him with such ridicule as, "Nuthing escapes Mr. Rucevelt. No subject is tu hi fr him to takl, nor tu lo for him tu notis." Although most of Teddy's plan was rejected, words containing the British-English suffix our, such as flavour and colour, were permanently shortened in America, resulting in flavor and color.

- Jeffrey Kacirk in "Tuesday 27 October",
in Forgotten English - A 365-Day Calendar of Vanishing Vocabulary and Folklore for 2009.

Conspiciuously useful codpieces

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Codpiece. A part of the male dress, formerly made very conspicuous.

- Robert Nare's Glossary of the Works of English Authors, 1859.

This curious pronouncement of virility was even sported by royalty, including Henry VIII, who added one to his suit of armor. Now on display at Windsor Castle, it was believed to bring fertility to barren women who touched it with a pin. Even Henry's nine-year-old son, soon-to-be-king Edward VI, can be seen wearing one in a portrait. This bizarre, multifunctional fashion reached its zenith of popularity in the 1560s, when it was used occasionally to support flagpoles in marching processions.

- "Friday 13 November" in Forgotten English - A 365-Day Calendar of Vanishing Vocabulary and Folklore for 2009, by Jeffrey Kacirk.

Hanging in there

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Anti-centenarianism: Opposition to the assertion that the persons from time to time reported to have died aged a century or more had really attained that age.

- Edward Loyd's Encyclopædic Dictionary, 1895,
as cited in "Tuesday 8 December" in Forgotten English - A 365-Day Calendar of Vanishing Vocabulary and Folklore for 2009, by Jeffrey Kacirk.


[Tuesday December 8th marks the d]eath of Henry Jenkins (c. 1501-1670), an extremely long-lived Englishman whose legendary 169-year lifespan fell within the reigns of nine monarchs, from Henvry VII to Charles II. Edmund Fillingham King's Ten Thousand Wonderful Things (c. 1853) recapped Jenkins's life:
"He remembered the Battle of Flodden Field, fought between the English and the Scotch [in] 1513, when he was about twelve years old. In the last century of his life he was a fisherman, and often swam in the river after he was a hundred years old.. In the King's Remembrancer Office in the exchequer there is a record of a deposition in a cause taken in April, 1665, at Kettlewell, Yorkshire, where Henry Jenkins of Ellerton-upon-Swale, labourer aged 157 years, ws produced and made deposition as a witness."
Robert Chambers's Book of Days (1864) mentioned that Jenkins was acquainted with one Peter Garden (1644-1775). Their combined lives spanned three centuries.

- "Tuesday 8 December" in Forgotten English - A 365-Day Calendar of Vanishing Vocabulary and Folklore for 2009, by Jeffrey Kacirk.

Urk

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Urk:
A small child or diminutive person. Fairies were formerly called urchins.

- Thomas Sternberg's Dialect and Folk-Lore of Northamptonshire, 1851,

and as cited in "Tuesday 10 November" in Forgotten English - A 365-Day Calendar of Vanishing Vocabulary and Folklore for 2009, by Jeffrey Kacirk.

Martin Luther and the Changeling

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Eight years ago there was a changeling in Dessau which I ... have both seen and touched. It was twelve years old and had all its senses so that people thought it was a proper child, but that mattered little for it only ate, and that as much as any four ploughmen or thrashers, and when anyone touched it it screamed. When things in the house went wrong it laughed and was merry, but if things went well it cried. Thereupon I said to the Prince of Anhalt, 'If I were ruler here, I would have this child thrown into the Moldau, that flows by Dessau' ... But [he] would not follow my advice. I then said they ought to cause a paternoster to be said in church, that God would take the devil away from them. Thsi was done daily at Dessau, and the changeling died two years after.

- Martin Luther in Table Talk, posthumously published in 1569,

and as cited in "Tuesday 10 November" in Forgotten English - A 365-Day Calendar of Vanishing Vocabulary and Folklore for 2009, by Jeffrey Kacirk.

Trepan

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Trepan:


A person who entraps or decoys others into actions or positions which may be to his advantage and to their ruin or loss. Also applied to an animal.

- Sir James Murray's New English Dictionary, 1926.

A snare; from Trapani, a part of Italy where our ships, being insidiously invited on the reign of Queen Elizabeth, were unjustly detained.

- Daniel Fenning's Royal English Dictionary, 1775.

Both definitions rendered as cited in "Thursday 1 October" in Forgotten English - A 365-Day Calendar of Vanishing Vocabulary and Folklore for 2009, by Jeffrey Kacirk.

Noblesse oblige

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Carriage folk: Gentry.

- Glossary of Surrey Words, 1893, by Granville Leveson-Gower,
as cited in "Monday 9 November" in Forgotten English - A 365-Day Calendar of Vanishing Vocabulary and Folklore for 2009, by Jeffrey Kacirk.

Haunted by Geese

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[Wednesday 11 November is the] Feast Day of St. Martin, for whom geese served as both a nemesis and a symbol. According to tradition, Martin hid in a barn to avoid being made a bishop, but was exposed by a honking goose. He reportedly died in AD 400 from eating goose, and since then roasted goose has traditionally been eaten on Martin's feast day.

- "Wednesday 11 November" in Forgotten English - A 365-Day Calendar of Vanishing Vocabulary and Folklore for 2009, by Jeffrey Kacirk.

Gestures

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Clara Allen: Did you give that boy your name before you left Montana?
Woodrow Call: I gave him my horse.
Clara: You gave him your horse, but not your name?
Woodrow: I put a lot more value on the animal than I do my name.

- Lonesome Dove

Vocabulary for carving poultry

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In the seventeenth century, carving was a science that carried with it as much pedantry as the business of school-teaching does at the present day, and for a person to use wrong terms in relation to carving was an unpardonable affront to etiquette. Carving all kinds of small birds was called to thy them; a quail, to wing it; a pheasant, to allay it; a duck, to embrace it; a hen, to spoil her; a goose, to tare her, and a list of similar technicalities too long and too ridiculous to repeat.

- The Perfect Gentleman, or Etiquette and Eloquence from 1860, by anonymous,
as cited in "Wednesday 11 November" in Forgotten English - A 365-Day Calendar of Vanishing Vocabulary and Folklore for 2009, by Jeffrey Kacirk.

Lonesome Dove

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Woodrow Call: Things sure have changed since the last time I was here. It's all growed up.
Augustus McCrae: Of course it's growed up, Woodrow. We killed all the Indians and bandits so the bankers could move in.
Woodrow: Only a fool would want the Indians back.
Gus: Has it ever occurred to you, Woodrow; that all the work we done was for the bankers? Hell, we killed off everybody made this country interestin'!

- Lonesome Dove

To bungfunger

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Bungfunger
To startle; to confuse. Also used as an adjective for confounded.

- John Farmer and W. E. Henley's Slang and Its Analogues, 1890-1904,
as cited in "Thursday 24 November" in Forgotten English - A 365-Day Calendar of Vanishing Vocabulary and Folklore for 2009, by Jeffrey Kacirk.

Bubblers

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Bubbler: One who cheats.

- Rev. John Boag's Imperial Lexicon of the English Language, c. 1850.



In September 1720, climaxing on [September 29], the South Sea investment bubble plummeted and eventually crashed. The stock value of the fraudlent South Seas Company went from a high of about £1000 earlier in 1720 to a low of £150. In order to inflate the value and expectations of the company, a series of rumors ws deliberately circulated by directors and big investors suggesting that the company would soon gain exclusive trading rights with Spain's Pacific colonies. Unheard-of ten percent dividends were announced, ,and spin-off companies were formed, making this investment seem as tempting as "dot-coms" nearly three centuries later.
Robert Chamber's Book of Days (1864) reported, "The Duke of Bridgewater and the Duke of Chandos were among the schemers. By these deceptive projects, which numbered nearly a hundred, one million and a half sterling was won and lost by crafty knaves and covetous fools ... The only policy of the projectors was to raise the shares in the market, and then to sell out, leaving the bubble to burst."

- "Tuesday 29 September" in Forgotten English - A 365-Day Calendar of Vanishing Vocabulary and Folklore for 2009,
by Jeffrey Kacirk.

Of dunces and dorbels

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Dunce Day [is] a humorous modern renaming of a commemoration of scholastic theologian John Duns Scotus (1266-1308) who died on November 8. Ironically, the expression "dunsman," the forerunner of the current term "dunce," was derived from the name of this Scottish philosopher, whose logical brilliance earned him a place in medieval university textbooks. Following his death, a group of followers tried to continue his work by attempting to explain a number of hair-splitting theological notions, including the Immaculate Conception. They were eventually overwhelmed with ridicule and branded "dunsmen." Over time, that epithet was shortened to dunces, from which came the familiar "dunce-cap" once used to humiliate schoolchildren lacking aptitude or manners.
Franciscan philosopher Nocholas Dorbellus [c. 1400-1475] developed his reputation by further expounding Duns's teachings [and thus giving rise to the expression] dorbel; "a dull-witted pedant; a foolish pretender to learning".

- "Saturday 7 / Sunday 8 November" in Forgotten English - A 365-Day Calendar of Vanishing Vocabulary and Folklore for 2009,
by Jeffrey Kacirk.

The Ways of Boston

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"I should shoot you were you breathe, you impertinent slut."
" [Laughter] Since when has propositioning the butler been grounds for murder?"
"You've much to learn about the ways of Boston, my dear. Copulation can be forgiven. But the loss of a butler... is fatal."

- Comanche Moon, part 3

Approaches to the hurling fridges of death

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You see, Freddie believes that if a fridge falls off a minivan, you'd better swirl out of the way. I believe that it's the fridges job to swirl out of mine.


- House of Cards, season 1: Chapter 4

Frisk som en fisk?

fish-whole:
As sound as a fish; thoroughly sound or healthy; [early 12900s-1600].

- Sir James Murray's New English Dictionary, 1901,
as cited in "Wednesday 18 November" in Forgotten English - A 365-Day Calendar of Vanishing Vocabulary and Folklore for 2009, by Jeffrey Kacirk.

New Year's Resolutions

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I don't believe in New Year's Resolutions, I find them dumb and inane. What kind of moron doesn't live every day with the intent of being the best they could possibly be? Anyway, my condescension aside, if it can motivate people, yay them and more power to them, but it's not for me. Not the serious kind.

So what about some frivolous ones? Maybe with a list of silly little goals, I'll do things I otherwise might not. Maybe it will serve as a reminder of a goal to stretch towards, rather than playing one more game of Hex Empire, searching frantically for a map so hideously imbalanced that you might not crush the AIs within minutes. So here goes. A totally unplanned, totally on-the-spur-of-the-moment list of fun things I'd like to do in 2013.

* Read at least 2 non-fiction books of more than 200 pages [HALF-CHECK! January 21st: "Abraham Lincoln"]
* Finish the remaining 20 or so pages in the word-a-day calendar I bought in 2009 and still haven't finished
* Write down the good quotes from what remains of the calendar
* Watch at least 1 TV show that stars Patrick Warburton in at least 9 episodes
* Play the Game of Thrones-board game at least four times [Quarter-check March 15th]
* Make a genuine effort at getting Obdormio to continue work on Olympian Dirtbags and have at least two new strips ready for publishing at year's end
* Watch at least 10 of these 35 movies:
In Bruges http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/In_Bruges
Gran Torino http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gran_Torino
Midnight Run http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Midnight_Run
Chronicle http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chronicle_(film)
District 9 http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/District_9
The Grey http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Grey
The Sting http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Sting
Tinker Soldier Tailor Spy http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tinker_Tailor_Soldier_Spy_(film)
Unforgiven http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unforgiven
All Dogs Go To Heaven http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/All_Dogs_Go_To_Heaven
Rob Roy http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rob_Roy_(film)
Long Kiss Goodnight http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Long_Kiss_Goodnight
The Usual Suspects http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Usual_Suspects
Sky Blue http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wonderful_Days
Pride and Prejudice http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pride_%26_Prejudice_(2005_film)
All the President's Men http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/All_the_President%27s_Men_(film)
The Seventh Seal http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Seventh_Seal
Super http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Super_(2010_American_film)
13 Assassins http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/13_Assassins
Assassination of a High School President http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Assassination_of_a_high_school_president
Beginners http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Beginners
Sliding Doors http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sliding_Doors
Slither http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Slither_(2006_film)
Time Bandits http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Time_Bandits
Unbreakable http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unbreakable_(film) [CHECK! March 5th]
Unknown http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unknown_(2011_film)
Hanna http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hanna_(film) [CHECK! February 16th]
Hostage http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hostage_(film)
Grosse Pointe Blank http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grosse_Pointe_Blank
The Road http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Road_(2009_film)
Limitless http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limitless
Marie Antoinette http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marie_Antoinette_(2006_film) [CHECK! January 25th]
Jumanji http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jumanji_(film)
RocknRolla http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/RocknRolla
The Last Unicorn http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Last_Unicorn_(film)
* Check out at least 2 superhero cartoons I had not previously seen from end to end
* Read through that collection of Tarzan novels I bought in 2011 and barely started [Read 3/8 novels as per April 30th]
* Write a short story [CHECK! January 5th: "The Man and the River"]
* Strike at least three dramas, two comedies and two non-drama non-comedy shows off of my neverending to-watch list (this does not include any new 2013 shows I might check out) [As per April 30th: 3/3 dramas (Lonesome Dove, Elizabeth I, House of Cards), 1/2 comedies (The Tick), 1/2 non-drama non-comedy (Avatar: The Last Airbender/Legend of Korra).
* Go to the theatre at least thrice to see something that isn't based on a comic book, fairy tale or part of an existing movie franchise [ÜBER-CHECK! January 16th: "Django Unchained", January 25th: "Les Misérables", February 5th: "Wreck-It Ralph". Later also saw "Cloud Atlas"]
* Rewatch Amélie with my girlfriend [CHECK! February 22nd]
* Make at least 12 new strips for my own shitty half-dead webcomic
* Read at least 2 books by Neil Gaiman [Half-check! February 28th: Smoke and Mirrors]
* Remember to yet again profusely thank the guy who introduced me to Frank and Sadie Doyle [CHECK! March 4th. By linking this video]
* Revisit this list to remember to do all of this stuff


Happy New Year, everyone!

The new TV shows of 2012

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As promised, here is the New TV of 2012 post! And on New Year's Eve to boot!

I did a similar post about new 2011 shows last year, and for those interested in how 2011's surviving shows held up in 2012, have a look here.

Before I start, let me say that overall, 2011 was an unusually great year for new TV, and 2012 was not. But 2012 did really well with its old-timers, I must say, and since those fall outside the scope of this list, I thought I'd just take a second to celebrate that several years old shows like Spartacus, Downton Abbey, Boardwalk Empire, Weeds, Sons of Anarchy, Damages and even so often uneven Dexter all had seasons I found superior to their last outings. Well done, TV!


So! Without further ado, the 30 new TV things that
1) aired for the first time in 2012
and
2) was checked out by me.



WEAK

30 * The Mindy Project (Fox) - returning [NOT FINISHED IT]
I can usually find something to like about nearly anything, so it's no surprise that I don't have strong negative feelings about the show on the bottom of this list. In point of fact, I would easily give it another chance if someone whose opinion I trust said it got better as it went. It wasn't bad, it was just not very good. It had one regular character who was consistently funny, and that was about it. Oh well. I saw three episodes, and only episode 2 was even halfway okay. When the third one was weak again, I dropped it. They can't all be winners.

29 * Ben and Kate (Fox) - returning [NOT FINISHED IT]
Much like The Mindy Project, this just felt bland, and even more so considering its typically sitcom-y premise. I liked the cast generally better on this though, which is the only reason I rank it a spot higher in spite of having seen only two of its episodes. But again, if you watch this and it gets better, I'm not opposed to giving it another shot.

28 * Girls (HBO) - returning
Oh man, at first I strongly disliked this show. None of the characters were remotely interesting or compelling in any way. I'm fine with characters who aren't likable. I'm fine with characters who aren't interesting. I'm fine with characters who aren't funny. But when all the characters are none of the three, then why am I watching them? My girlfriend was even more put off, and refused to watch another second of it after episode 2.
Considering the insane amounts of critical praise and the fact that it's on HBO, though, I soldiered ahead on my own, and it did get a couple of notches better. Which is to say, a couple of characters started being reasonably interesting or likable. Stupidly almost only the MALE characters (the protagonist's roomate and the corny virgin girl are okay), making the show title really unfortunate, but whatever, I'll take what I can get. So now it's watchable, but that's really all it is. I guess I maybe just don't get Apatow. I found "Freaks & Geeks" decent, but nothing special. "Undeclared" outright sucked, in spite of the Sons of Anarchy-star-to-be doing his best to carry it. And I can't recall an Apatow-movie I've seen that I liked. At some point, I suppose you should throw in the towel.
But damnit all, it's HBO, and it DID stop utterly sucking, so I'm checking out season 2 as well.

27 * Animal Practice (NBC) - cancelled [NOT FINISHED IT]
Great, great cast. Really underwhelming jokes. That's really it. Not a loss, unfortunately. These guys can and should all get way better jobs elsewhere. I will probably see the three last episodes that were dumped on Hulu after cancellation at some point in January just to satisfy my own anal hatred of loose ends, though.


DECENT

26 * Green Lantern: The Animated Series (Cartoon Network) - returning
And so we're into decent-but-nothing-special-land. While I sorely wish it was hand-animated, GL:TAS is quite decent, and if a superhero was ever tailored for CGI I suppose it's this one. Keeping up the DC animation tradition of recent decades with layered characters and plots steeped in moral grey areas, this seems a great show for kids, but for an adult it's a bit borderline too simple and straightforward.

25 * The Hollow Crown (BBC) - ended
I have a hard time ranking this, so I just put it here at the lower end of what I found watchable but not much more. Clearly, the production value is huge. Clearly, these plays are classics, and clearly, the budget on and scale of this adaptation was huge. Clearly, the acting talent involved is just beyond amazing. But clearly, I don't have the relationship to these plays necessary to fully enjoy this. The lengthy monologues come off as unnecessary, and the banter is often a few touches too hard to follow in the Shakespearean English for the foreign uninitiate like me. I wish it had subtitles. Oh well. Falstaff was amazing, and the latter two films were better than the first, I suppose that sums up what little I can comment on this.

24 * 1600 Penn (NBC) - pilot, the show proper starting in 2013
On the one hand, I'm really not sold. On the other hand, for a first sitcom outing, this is clearly and easily superior to The Mindy Project, Ben and Kate and Girls. Pros are the central cast of Elfman and Pullman (both of whom I usually like a good bit), as well as the two eldest children characters. Especially the son was charming, as he did a spin on the typical family screw-up pot-head overweight geek by being immensely cosy and likable and not at all a jackass. Wasn't hilarious, but it was amusing, and could grow into something good. Sitcoms typically need a handful of episodes to find their footing, and I'm very easily willing to give this show that unless it completely changes for the worse in the second episode.

23 * Treasure Island (Sky1) - ended
Eddie Izzard as Long John Silver should be a sight to behold, but he really doesn't get to do as much cool stuff as you'd wish, in spite (or possibly because) of the miniseries trying to make him out as a second protagonist more than a villain. As a whole, this was a good adaptation, whose changes to the original story were by and large clever ones. One major such change was making the ship's owner an utter ass and villain in order to make Hawkins' choice between pirates and honest men a less clear-cut one. That's a good touch. Also, Donald Sutherland pulls off an hysterically over the top captain Flint in his small cameo scenes. But for a book that's been adapted as many times as this one, they really should have brought more to it than they did, and I must say that while this was decent, it should have been great.

22 * Parade's End (BBC/HBO) - ended
I struggled a bit with feeling involved and engaged by this miniseries at first, but as it went on, it became easier. The dialogue and acting is great, and the plotting is good too, though I wish it was a tad easier to follow here and there. The foot-dragging start and slightly underwhelming ending hinders it from having made a truly deep impression on me, though.

21 * Revolution (NBC) - returning
Surprisingly good, this show, and for a network action-adventure it is littered with good guest actors and secondary characters. The arc moves a tad too slow for me, but it is still much, much faster than many other network action-adventures, so I probably shouldn't complain. If you're going to give one of the many postapocalyptic adventure shows of recent years a shot, this is probably the one to go with.

20 * Bent (NBC) - cancelled
Charming sitcom, and with a very solid cast, but in the end not all that funny. Don't miss is as much as I hoped I would, if that makes any kind of sense.

19 * World Without End (Showcase) - ended
Considering my slight disappointment at "The Pillars of the Earth", I thought for sure this 120-years-later-sequel series without Ian McShane would be a disaster. Perhaps it was my low expectations, but I really rather enjoyed it. Some good intrigue, some engaging characters, and a nice period framework for the whole thing. Not a warm recommendation or anything, but if village intrigues with a touch of soap and action in Ye Olde England sounds fun for you, you'll probably think this is quite decent entertainment too.

18 * Battlestar Galactica: Blood and Chrome (Syfy) - failed pilot
This could have grown into something quite good if given the chance, but on its own, the pilot isn't that impressive. Worth watching if you're a fan though. On the plus side, they did a very good job (in my opinion) with making it feel equally like a sequel to "Caprica" as it feels a prequel to "Battlestar Galactica". On the con side, the guy they got to play the young Adama has a very clear, light voice that in no way justifies being given the nickname "Husker"...


GOOD

17 * Don't Trust the B... in Apartment 23 (ABC) - returning
Very variable show, this. Sometimes it's very good, sometimes it's very underwhelming, and for the most part it's just okay. I like the concept, though, and the title character can be very funny in it when given the right jokes and plotlines. "Oh, I'm sorry I called you for no reason, then." "Are you kidding, you did me a favour, I love being on the phone when I hail a cab! bigsmile"

16 * Tron: Uprising (Disney XD) - returning
Big surprise, this. Good voice actors (John Glover's even had a stint), nice visuals, decent plots. The animation looks ... odd ... but in a way that sort of works with the supposed digital world. For a kids action cartoon that doesn't lean at all on humour but just plots and action, this is really of a very impressive level.

15 * H+ (online) - returning
This Bryan Singer-produced series is one odd show. Made as a mosaic, every installment usually clocks in somewhere between 2 and 6 minutes in length, and takes place in a 20-year period feauturing several major globally dispersed locatinos and an immense ensamble of regulars who only rarely interact. It centres (splendidly) around an apocalyptic technology failure (or sabotage) that cripples the modern world, with about about half of the episodes being set long before and setting it up, a quarter long after and looking at ripples and further events, and a quarter more or less during this major Event. Some good actors I know from TV show up regularly (Hannah Simone, Alexis Denishof, Sean Gunn, to name a few), but mostly this is a cast of actors I don't really know who impressively manage to stand up to the ones I do. I should also mention that the special effects are gorgeous and would easily fit right in on any major network TV show.
The main con on this show is that it by its very nature is a tad tough to follow without excessive rewatches, and (also a natural result of the structure) that the plot is a tad slow-moving. The main pros are; it's pretty, it's interesting, it's intelligent, it's engaging, it's well-acted and it's really quite exciting once you're plugged in with a basic understanding of what's what and who's who.

14 * Arrow (CW) - returning
Basically Smallville, but without super powers, and much less unrealistic (note that this in no way means "realistic") and gritty as well. Well balanced between flashbacks to the mysterious origin story on the island and the current time vendetta. For a Mr Handsome Protagonist Guy the main character actor isn't too bad, and there is a lot of nice talent to be found in the supporting cast. I also must admit to like seeing John Barrowman as the token scary back-of-a-limousine villain. Should work well for the actor.
"Arrow" balances standalone plots with ongoing ones very well, and has a veritable parade of comic book character cameos and appearances on top. Sure, they're not always all that faithful, but if you look at the character interpretations as a sort of Christopher Nolan-style realistic take on them, they work a lot better. So... not a show I thought I'd approve of, but so far, I find myself giving a big thumbs up for "Arrow"!

13 * Ultimate Spider-Man (Disney XD) - returning
I hear a lot of hardcore Spidey-fans hate this show. They dislike the goofy attempts at humour, they hate the meta-aspects, and they probably have other issues with it as well. Well, I really like it. I find the humour (mostly) quite funny, and occasionally outright hilarious. The meta-aspects might not be 100% within the typical Spider-Man formula, but having grown up with the 90s cartoon where his inner monologue was omni-present, having Spidey address the reader directly isn't that jarring for me. And finally, I think they're doing a very good job of the mythology building, and of making him a vibrant part of the broader Marvel universe without drowning him in it. All that said, I do think I would have wished for a more serious approach, ideally one following its brilliant comic book namesake, as the show's main weakness is an inability in making me anxious and invested during its multitudes of action sequences.
If like me, by the way, this would tip the scale for you to check it out, here are some recurring or regular voice talent names involved on this show: Chi McBride, John DiMaggio, Mark Hamill, Clancy Brown and Adrian Pasdar! Add to that J. K. Simmons reprising his mind-bogglingly awesome J. J. Jameson from the Raimi movies, Clark Gregg as his wonderful live action Avengers/Iron Man-character Phil Coulson (now with added silly) and STAN LEE as a suspisciously Stan Lee-looking school janitor, this show's got a better cast than most live action endeavours.

12 * NAV (TvNorge) - ended
I loved loved loved "Etaten", the short Norwegian comedy from a few years back that was (very) loosely inspired by "The Office". Well, this year they made a sequel series. It's not as good, but it WAS very good, and I thoroughly enjoyed everything about it -- except the ending. The ending was a tame, predictable and underwhelming rehash of the beautiful ending of the original series. But otherwise, this was great. I'm gettin' the DVD.

11 * Veep (HBO) - returning
Nowhere as funny as "The Thick of It", this endeavour at recreating its formula in American politics is still rather charming. A telling running gag for the type of comedy you should expect is how the Vice President upon returning to her office from various more or less pointless outings always asks the secretary if the President called. (He obviously never does). And it's HBO, so I'm hopeful for increased awesome as it goes on. That said, this show needs an angry Scotsman who swears a lot, and it needs it very badly.

10 * Go On (NBC) - returning
Sentimental but rarely melancholy, fresh but rarely truly original, funny but rarely hilarious, "Go On" is a show of the middle ground between the safe and the daring, but it does its balancing act rather well. It's great to see Matthew Perry back in a part where he can flex his dramatic muscles a bit more, even if its otherwise pretty much the same guy he played on the much more underwhelming "Mr. Sunshine" last year. The cast of characters is rounded out by varying oddballs, predictably some of which are fun, some are hilarious, some are interesting, some are likable, and some are just tiring. From those adjectives, though, you can surmise that I by and large like the cast and, indeed, the show. The show is clearly trying to use the kind of crazy out-of-the-box thinking of brilliant shows like "Parks and Recreation" and "Community" and doing watered down creativity stunts within the borders a safe, normal formula show that will have a broader and more traditional sitcom appeal. Oddly enough, I feel like it's kind of working.

9 * Elementary (CBS) - returning
For a show that's an obvious attempt at doing the masterful Sherlock as a weekly US series, this is quite surprisingly fun. I mean, it doesn't hold even the discarded puddle of coagulated wax from a candle to "Sherlock", but if seen on its own merits alone, it's quite good. My main issue with crime-of-the-week-shows is the utter formulaic procedural feel of it, but they've manouvered around that by making the Watson/Holmes-friendship the centre of the story instead of the particular crimes. The show this reminds me most of all of isn't even "Sherlock", it's "House". And if it can steer away from the repetitive plot circles of "House", I don't see any reason why this show would just keep on getting better.
And on the flimsiest of associations, click here for good fun: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kXpyCa9IcEM


GREAT

8 * House of Lies (Showtime) - returning
A grittier "Hustle", a raunchier "Suits", and more morally bankrupt than both of them, "House of Lies" is corporate cynicism and wink-at-the-audience humour distilled with just the tiniest pinch of soap to make it all slide down. Not a fantastic show, but a damn, damn good one, and with all the gloss that only Showtime can offer. Also, Don Cheadle, Kristen Bell, Richard Schiff, Greg Germann and that Jean-Ralphio-fellow from "Parks and Recreation" (Ben Schwartz), I'm just saying.

7 * Awake (NBC) - cancelled
This show had an excellent premise, a great actor in the main part, a wonderful atmosphere, a gripping storyline, and a predictably uneven execution. Which is to say it was really great for a network drama, and was expected to tank long before it ever premiered. As you can tell from the high ranking, I really enjoyed this show. True, it dragged on a bit in the middle of the season, and cancelled just as it got really interesting and clever, I think I'll miss this rather a lot.

6 * Last Resort (ABC) - cancelled
Another network show whose premise is such that I can't believe this thig isn't on cable. I guess the creative influence of the heavy cable dramas on general popular culture is starting to show. Anyway, Last Resort. With the best premise I've ever heard for a drama (bar. none.), this show had to disappoint, and of course it did. It is very good, but it is nowhere near as good as it by all rights should be. A renegade submarine crew with a dozen nuclear warheads refuse an order, take over an island, and attempt to uncover a conspiracy back home? Yeah. This show should be a Battlestar Galactica in present day, but unfortunately has ended up feeling a bit more like Stargate: Universe. Furthermore, it doesn't quite suck me in like it by all rights should, even when it is at its best. Oh well. It's still very, very good. And very, very non-renewed. Shawn Ryan? Chicago Code was a disappointment in 2011, and now in 2012 this was a middling performance when considering its brilliant premise. So get back to cable. Terriers might have only lived for one season too, but it shone like a crazy diamond every step of its doomed way.

5 * Luck (HBO) - cancelled
I did not know what to expect here. On the one hand, a show about horse racing sounds incredibly dull. On the other hand, it's made by the genious behind Deadwood, it airs on HBO, and it stars Dustin Hoffman, and so should be filled to the brink with awesome.
Turns out, horse racing IS incredibly dull, but the show IS filled to the brink with awesome. It took me a couple of episodes to get into it (the dialogue and storylines are so dense, I struggled to pick up on all the nuances of what was going on), but once I was, I was sold. That said, this is still easily my least favourite of all the crime dramas HBO has done (and they're quite a few now). Horses running is and always will be horses running. That might be pretty once or twice, but it doesn't warrant long, extended sequences every episode.

4 * Political Animals (USA) - cancelled
A big, big surprise! I never expected to enjoy this so thoroughly. A sunnier "State of Play" without the thriller-aspects, "Kings" in the real world, "Veep" pitched as a soapy drama, there are a hundred ways to describe this show, but really, you should just watch it. Very loosely inspired by the Clintons, this show depicts the lives of a Secretary of State, her ex-husband who is a former president, their two sons, and the reported with a grudge against them. All portrayed excellently. Ciarán Hinds in particular is unbeatable as the flamboyant, self-assured womanizer with a heart of gold, but really, the whole series was great fun. I'd rather have a second season of this than of any other show not renewed this year.

3 * Bunheads (ABC) - returning
Yes, yes, yes, it's an obvious Gilmore Girls 2.0, and it has only about 50% of the charm. The leading lady is great, but she's no Lauren Graham. The girls in the dancing school are cute and funny, but they're not on par with Rory in the early seasons. And Kelly Bishop's character is awesome, but she's not as awesome as the one she played on Gilmore Girls, because how could she be.
But honestly, so what? Gilmore Girls is one of the, if not the, best everyday dramas I've ever seen, so even if this as of yet doesn't reach it to the knees, it's still a welcome delight on my screen any day of the week. And bonus points for having referenced Game of Thrones at least three (or was it four?) times in a mere half-season.

2 * Mockingbird Lane (NBC) - failed pilot
Bryan Fuller writing Eddie Izzard as a grandfatherly count Dracula? Yeah, you had me at hello. This needs a full series order like Nathan Fillion needs an adventure movie franchise. And if you haven't seen it, it works pretty well as a standalone forty-minute TV movie, too, so run off and do so.

1 * The Newsroom (HBO) - returning
It is slim pickings when a lone pilot and a clear rehash, no matter how great, reach two of the top three spots. Compared to last year (Game of Thrones! Shameless! HOMELAND!), it's really nothing to write home about. Nor is The Newsroom, unfortunately. Aaron Sorkin is perhaps the greatest TV writer I know of, and certainly in the top three. This is his first show on cable, and not only on cable, but on HBO, which is still the goddamn king of the TV drama however AMC might protest. And even the cast is great. So why am I not raving and raving? Well, it has a few issues. First, being preachy works better when your cast is politicians or business people with a clear agenda. I get that journalists want to report the news and that this in theory is a clear agenda, but unfortunately, setting it in the contemporary USA seems to have made it impossible to avoid presenting it as such without being sucked in by the very politicizing the show attempts to critique. Second, Sorkin is retreading old ground a bit too much. The big reveal centred around a reluctant conversation with a therapist, sir? You did that on West Wing. Twice. And both times better than this.
And third, while the notion of setting it in the recent past so as to comment on pseudo-recent news makes it feel both genuine and contemporary. But it also makes it very, very lacking in tension. Because how can we possibly care about the characters' fight to reform US media when it is set 12 months ago, that it follows real-life developments, and we, being a year ahead of them, clearly know it hasn't been reformed since then?
None of which is to say it is bad. Far from it. It is really, really good. It just isn't "Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip"-good, at least for the most part, and it most certainly is not "The West Wing"-good. But with the great cast finding their footing, and the plot ball rolling, engines picking up steam, and other positive clichés in mind, I have faith that season 2 will be better.
And all this said, this is still the winner of the year's new offerings.



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Comments, input, thoughts? Anything new this year you saw that wasn't on this list? Do please write it below!

The returning TV shows from 2011

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Another year has passed, and another ungodly amount of my earthly hours have been invested in watching TV shows. A post about 2012's new ones will be forthcoming soon (click here to read), but for today, I thought I'd take a look at how the new shows of 2011 held up in their second year.

Please see here for my original article about 2011's new shows, which this entire posting is in reference to.

18 of the 27 new shows I checked out last year still aired mentionable amounts of new contents this calendar year, and I will go through them from weakest to best. For each show, I'll make a general judgment of whether it stayed more or less the same, got better, or worse. I'll also list its ranking last year in parantheses, for your convenient reference (that number is obviously adjusted to remove the many shows that showed up on the list last year but didn't air anything in 2012).

Without further ado, the list:

IMPROVED 18 (15) * Breakout Kings (A&E) - dead
Simpson kept carrying this show, but the other actors got more to do this season, and improved further with the removal of one of the less interesting members of the ensamble cast early on. The second season also sported a season villain, which was a huge step up in terms of arc. It's sad that even after a lot of improvement, the show ended up further down on the list than it did last year, but (unsurprisingly and encouragingly) most of the shows on the lower end of the list improved in their second outing, and Breakout Kings simply improved the least.


IMPROVED 17 (17) * Falling Skies (TNT) - will return
The only show I outright gave up on last year, and then this year, because I'm weak-willed, relented on and gave a second shot. Whilst still not great entertainment, it got a lot better. The show is doing very well at making sure every new insight into the alien threat (and we do get new insights) are followed by even more mysteries and questions. The cast is still more or less a good one, even if the characters could stand to be a bit less formulaic. Oh, and it added Terry O'Quinn as a recurring towards the end, and that cannot possibly be a bad thing.


IMPROVED 16 (18) * Husbands (online series) - will return
I was disappointed in this last year, but changing to fewer and longer episodes improved it a lot. Joss Whedon's part as one of the main characters' agent is flat out hysterical, but the show as a whole got funnier too. I'm glad, as I really wanted to like this, and last year kind of wasn't. Of all the shows with the IMPROVED-tag, this is one of the ones with the biggest leap.


IMPROVED 15 (12) * Grimm (NBC) - will return
The severe standaloneitus I diagnosed last year seems to be only a mild case now, but it's definitely still there. They still need to get a lot better at not making up new creatures every week, and they still need to get better at doing big arc stuff, and they still need to get better at not dragging their feet with the interpersonal plots, and they still really need a protagonist with a personality. But gosh, they ARE actually getting better at all these things, even if there is still vast room for improvement on all fronts. And Silas Weir Mitchell is still positively adorably good here.


IMPROVED 14 (13) * Alphas (Syfy) - ask Schrödinger
The second season of Alphas improved like the first season promised, but not nearly to the degree that I had hoped. Some of the cast here is really good, other parts are rather underwhelming. The plotlines are still a mesh of The 4400, X-men and Heroes, but they're staying good at keeping the power levels down, at keeping the episodes streamlined and reasonably engaging. So in short, it is improved, but less so than others, which is why it is bumped a spot down on the ladder this year. My expectations for next year is more of the same, with possibly and hopefully another slight increase in quality -- assuming there will be another season, that is.


IMPROVED 13 (11) * Young Justice (Cartoon Network) - will return
Young Justice did a genious move between season 1 and 2 -- it skipped five years ahead, updated the team roster accordingly, and added a subtitle reflecting the new ongoing plots. Man, was that clever. The new episodes are just as accessible to the casual viewer, but with a myriad of subplots for the faithful watcher, piecing together what the various old cast members have been doing in the five year gap. And it's usually very interesting stuff.


SAME 12 (10) * Harry's Law (NBC) - dead
Harry's Law got even more Kelley-standardised in the second season, departing its quaint shoe shop-offices for a bigger law firm. But the show for the most part stayed the same: a lot of heart, a lot of preaching, and a lot of quirky fun. And with its cancellation, I'm particularly lamenting Christopher McDonald's character, a signature Kelley-creation on par with Denny Crane, Alan Shore, Richard Fish and John Cage.


IMPROVED 11 (16) * The Borgias (Showtime) - will return
Much, much less disappointing this year, but still not by far all that I feel it should be. The intrigues just aren't clever enough, and while I cared more about the cast in season 2 than I did in season 1, I still feel an emotional distance to the whole thing that's really unfortunate. Hopefully it will keep on improving next year, because on paper, this show should be really darn solid.


WEAKENED 10 (4) * Revenge (ABC) - will return
Disappointed! I loved this show in the first half of season 1, but since then, it has gotten mired down in soap, and the revenge that made the first batch of episodes so very engaging is hardly ever front and centre anymore. It's still quite a good show, don't get me wrong, but it's cemented its departure from greatness this year, and it's not looking like it will return to form. That said, there is a lot of good stuff going on here, and even in its changed form I will be watching this every week as long as they care to make it. I only hope that one day it will get as awesomely cold and engaging as it once was.


SAME 9 (9) * Ringer (CW) - dead
I can't believe this show was on the CW and still made my top 10 last year. Oh, it was soapy bordering on the operatic, sure, but it was also engaging, twisty and reasonably clever. While never a favourite of mine, this is one of the cancellations of 2012 that I will miss more than I expected to, I think.


IMPROVED 8 (14) * New Girl (Fox) - will return
Deschanel's been thankfully toned down, the other regulars given way more attention, and yes, I really, really like this show now. It's consistently fresh, it's consistently charming (I still dislike Jess, but much less so than before), and most of all, it's consistently funny. Probably the biggest ladder-bump of all on this list.


SAME 7 (8) * Suburgatory (ABC) - will return
This show's just solid, I don't know what more there is to say. But here goes: Nearly every character is idiosyncratically funny and played by good actors, and while every single episode might not be hilarious, they're all good fun, with just the right amount of grounded heart and sentiment to make you care. As Jeremy Sisto said in an interview, you watch it because it's fun, and then there's also other stuff, that make you feel and care and maybe even think, but that's just extra, that's bonus. Show's funny.


IMPROVED 6 (7) * Once Upon A Time (ABC) - will return
The hammy acting of the early first season nearly completely gone from the main cast by now, this show's really found its footing. Gone are the boring standalone episodes. Gone is the dreadful main arc of Snow White and Prince Charming being in love but not remembering why. Character relationships change dynamically. Who's good and bad becomes less and less clear even as they maintain a cheesy fairy tale-style morality framework. Captain Hook's been disappointing -- a fun rougish pirate he is, but I wanted Cold and Scary Hook, not a swashbuckling staple pirate -- and that's really the only negative. very pleased with this. I look forward to the new episodes every week.


IMPROVED 5 (6) * Boss (Starz) - dead, with tiny chance of movie
Way to go! Boss really cleaned up its act this season, fixing basically all my concerns from season 1. So of course, they cancelled it. _ANNOYED_. Really crossing my fingers for that movie, but I'm not exactly holding my breath.


SAME 4 (5) * Suits (USA) - will return
Exactly what it was last year: "Funny, exciting, and most of all plain cool, this is as good as a lightweight fluff-over-substance drama can reasonably be expected to be." Aye, Past-Me, aye.


SAME 3 (2) * Game of Thrones (HBO) - will return
I was considering saying it had improved, but some absolutely incomprehensible creative decisions in the final few episodes really ruined the experience of season 2 for me, so I think overall I must say it's much the same. Which is to say it's astonishingly well pulled off, but still doesn't hold even a third of a candle to even the weakest of the books. That said, season 3's subject matter should have the framework needed to bring the show to new levels entirely, so I'm hopeful this fantastic adaptation can rise even higher next year.


WEAKENED 2 (1) * Shameless [the US remake] (Showtime) - will return
I gushed a lot about this show last year. And don't get me wrong, season 2 was very awesome, but it wasn't as charming nor was it as fun as season 1. I'm not exactly disappointed, as I still thoroughly love the show ... but I must admit that I had hoped it would keep overwhelming me with greatness every episode, and it didn't. Oh well. Still utterly fantastic.


SAME 1 (3) * Homeland (Showtime) - will return
Mandy Patinkin is still in this.



Hm? You need more? That's highly unreasonable, but okay: I HAVE NO IDEA HOW THEY DO IT. The balls of this show. Nearly every episode burns more important plot-bridges than entire seasons of even quality cable shows tend to do. And from a creative standpoint, setting up season three, the stuff they pulled off in the finale is just mind-boggling. I don't know how they do it, I don't know how they can KEEP ON DOING IT, but there they are, every week, doing it. And while I judge it as pretty much the same level of awesome as it was last year, having _kept_ _this_ _up_ for an entire second season is an immense achievement and I'll say it, an improvement in and of itself. First sport. Easily. Heck, it'd be the first spot compared to every single show airing in 2012, regardless of when they premiered (with the sole caveat that I've not yet seen this year's Breaking Bad). If ever a show deserved its onslaught of awards, Homeland does.
Also, my heart strings seem to be permanently chained to Patinkin's facial muscles now.


--


Mostly, it seems they got better, and only two got noticeably weaker. Encouraging, that.

Feel free to consider this a heartfelt recommendation of everything from spot 8 and upwards for everyone who likes quality television, and a friendly nudge to check out spots 9 through 14 as well if any of the premises catch your interest.

Do please share your thoughts on whatever of this you've seen! The only thing I like more than lists is talking about lists.

The third ingredient

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Brains and ambition, and thinks that's supposed to get him somewhere. No fucking style, at all.

- Chester "Ace" Bernstein on Nathan Israel,
in David Milch's Luck, episode 3: Ace Meets with a Talented Whiz Kid

Look before you leap

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The Hares waged war with the Eagles, and called upon the Foxes to help them.
They replied, "We would willingly have helped you, if we had not known who you were, and with whom you were fighting."

- Aesop's Fables: The Hares and the Foxes

Right as Roosevelt

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Right as Roosevelt: Entirely right.

- Maurice Weseen's Dictionary of American Slang, 1934,
as cited by Jeffrey Kacirk in "Tuesday 27 October",
in Forgotten English - A 365-Day Calendar of Vanishing Vocabulary and Folklore for 2009.

The trees and the axe

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A man came into a forest, and made a petition to the Trees to provide him a handle for his axe. The Trees consented to his request, and gave him a young ash-tree. No sooner had the man fitted from it a new handle to his axe, then he began to use it, and quickly felled with his strokes the noblest giants of the forest.

An old oak, lamenting when too late the destruction of his companions, said to a neighboring cedar:
"The first step has lost us all. If we had not given up the rights of the ash, we might yet have retained our own privileges and have stood for ages."

- Aesop's Fables: The Trees and the Axe