September 19

Thursday, 20. September 2007, 01:32:44

<EDIT>
I think I have some kind of depression. I don't know to what extent but I do have an idea of what might be causing it - which is a good thing, at least I can identify it. I'm trying to let some stuff go - I don't want this to slowly consume me like a snowball. I know I can do better, I just wished I had more support from those around me, but if can't have it, then I will stand on my own for my own sake.

I also received a great advice from Sukku. I thank him for it - it's just what I needed today

</EDIT>

Pure honesty in that email. and what did I get? .. nothing. not a fucking thing...
fuck it. it's not like I expected to get the same response... but how 'bout a *I read your mail*... *thanks for the mail* ... *thanks for the thoughts* ... something like that?

ohh fuck. I just want it to be like old times, you know? when you felt you know what. I liked that... I liked having that feeling. and by the way, when a girl is telling you her eyes are burning, it means she's crying. when she tells you she is not fine, she is crying. when she says she needs to calm down, she is crying. ok? just keep that in mind. don't ignore it. you don't know how bad she is doing... a little sympathy will always do.

we're complicated but there's a psychological reason to it: women WANT to feel protected and loved. and I don't see anything wrong with that.... I'm feeling neither protected nor loved; I just feel very lonely and very sad.

but hey, who cares right? life goes on. blah blah whatever.

Of special dates...Happy B-day to me!!