Friday, 23. June 2006, 23:20:42
jokes, life, Miscellaneous, Have your say!
...
If money does'nt grow on trees then why do banks have branches?
Why does a round pizza comes in a square box?
Why does'nt stick to its bottle?
Why do you still call it building when it is already built?
If its true that we are here to help others, what are other here for?
If you are'nt supposed to drink and drive, why do bars have parking lots?
Monday, 8. May 2006, 05:40:34
Fun, Have your say!
Sign at a Budapest zoo: "Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty."
Sign at a garage in Hertfordshire: "Please do not smoke near the pumps. If your life isn't worth anything - gas is!"
Sign on the menu of a Swiss restaurant: "Our wines leave you nothing to hope for."
Sign on the box of a clockwork toy made in Hong Kong: "Guaranteed to work throughout its useful life."
Sign in a Swiss mountain inn: "Special today -- no ice cream."
Sunday, 30. April 2006, 04:31:11
Thought of the day!, life, Have your say!
We tell lies when we are afraid ... afraid of what we don't know,
afraid of what others will think, afraid of what will be found out
about us. But every time we tell a lie, the thing that we fear grows
stronger. -- Tad Williams
Thursday, 27. April 2006, 01:18:10
Have your say!, life, me
Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?
Friday, 21. April 2006, 02:56:43
politics, Have your say!
Should monarchs be involved in politics, or should they just be figureheads?
Forty-four countries currently have a Royal family, although most have made the transition from absolute to constitutional monarchies.
Recently, Nepal has seen protests after King Gyanendra sacked parliament and assumed direct powers. King Mswati III of Swaziland is also facing demonstrations over his country's lack of political freedom.
In contrast, the Royal Families of Thailand and Japan, are generally held in high regard.
Do you live in a monarchy? What role should monarchs play in the affairs of their country? If you live in a republic, would you like a King or Queen?
Thursday, 20. April 2006, 23:15:09
Family, Have your say!, life, love
Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance - particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as Super 12 Version 5.0, Tri-Nations 3.0, Limited Overs 7.2 and especially Golf Clubs 4.1.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.
I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?
Signed,
Desperate
Dear Desperate,
First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System.
Please enter the command: "http: I Thought You Loved Me.htm" and try to download Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.
If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, over use of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1.
Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta. Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background, that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.
Also, do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 7.7.
Good Luck,
Tech Support
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