Wednesday, 26. August 2009, 01:27:43
hi,
There are times when life reminds us of the importance of ‘living in the moment’ – on Sunday night I found myself with a severe bout of gastroenteritis so severe that severe de-hydration was quick and brutal, a painful night and day in hospital followed with delirium and with diarrhoea and sickness related incidents I won’t go into, on coming around finally sometime on the Monday it was to be told I was fortunate to have got to the hospital when I did as the de-hydration was serious and if left much longer could have resulted in permanent severe health problems or even death.
Although I most certainly do not wish to go through that again, in many ways it was a wonderful (if icky) illustration of the gift ‘living in the moment’ can be, we none of us know what is around the corner if we greet each moment as the wonderful gift it is and enjoy the experience be it ‘bad or good’ then what more can we ask from this life but to live it and experience it without allowing fear and worry to blunt the experience?
A line from one of Derek’s articles occurred a few times during my more lucid moments on Monday afternoon: -
“You will find that the present is literally a wonderful present. It is a miraculous gift filled with peace, contentment, energy, and excitement. It is a box full of delicious strawberries.”
http://www.truetao.org/living/2003/200301.htm
Whilst recuperating today at home I was flicking through the TTC and out of all the chapters kept landing on ttc 50: -
Chapter 50 - trans derek lin
Coming into life, entering death
The followers of life, three in ten
The followers of death, three in ten
Those whose lives are moved toward death
Also three in ten
Why? Because they live lives of excess
I've heard of those who are good at cultivating life
Travelling on the road, they do not encounter rhinos or tigers
Entering into an army, they are not harmed by weapons
Rhinos have nowhere to thrust their horns
Tigers have nowhere to clasp their claws
Soldiers have nowhere to lodge their blades
Why? Because they have no place for death
http://truetao.org/ttc/complete.htmthis physical life is fragile, what a waste it would be to ignore it and pretend it is of no import, each smell, taste, view, noise, feeling can be 'experienced’ as if for the first and last time, the 'awareness' is profound, can be profound ...
I could probably go on and on, but it might be best to leave it with minimal gushing about the wonder of ‘dao’ and its principles 
peace to you
beccaxx
Sunday, 19. July 2009, 02:26:05
As some of you will know (probably) i have been in (and am still in) an relationship with someone who (to be a little tacky and soppy) seems to 'complete me' -- i had been pondering how this 'fit' into daoist teachings and how to express what i had been pondering -- on an unrelated matter i was, as is occasionally my want perusing my copy of dereks translation of the Tao te ching, when i happened across his dedication to janice (source at end of post)."Finally, this book is dedicated to Janice Lin, the one person who makes everything possible. she holds the key that opens the door to all wonders."
Aside from being a truely moving tribute to someone whom has always come across as a lovely person via email, it showed me where to begin contemplating the means of expression for my own relationship, a place i would ordinarily have been looking, and perhaps instinctivly i was which is why i was immersed in my copy of the TTC today. So taking the old adage 'begin at the begining' i began with TTC 1 'door to all wonders' Chapter 1
The Tao that can be spoken is not the eternal Tao
The name that can be named is not the eternal name
The nameless is the origin of Heaven and Earth
The named is the mother of myriad things
Thus, constantly without desire, one observes its essence
Constantly with desire, one observes its manifestations
These two emerge together but differ in name
The unity is said to be the mystery
Mystery of mysteries, the door to all wondersA wonderful place to begin for truely in any truely 'harmonising/harmonious relationship' for what better to sum up TTC 1 than that or true harmonious, natural balance, that egalitarian relationship of yin-yang in constant harmonious movement in unity manifest and mystery.
Yet, it felt a little incomplete for the true feelings experienced in such relationships, so i read on, and truely i do reccomend a cover to cover, side to side, upside down and back to front reading of the TTC, (a good translatiosn such as derek lin's, Dr J wu's or D C Lau's are excellent places to start) we can become a little de-sensitised i think to the wisdoms it contains; still i read on and 'felt' a subtle 'click' a true enlightenment moment when i read and re-read TTC 16 Chapter 16
Attain the ultimate emptiness
Hold on to the truest tranquility
The myriad things are all active
I therefore watch their return
Everything flourishes; each returns to its root
Returning to the root is called tranquility
Tranquility is called returning to one's nature
Returning to one's nature is called constancy
Knowing constancy is called clarity
Not knowing constancy, one recklessly causes trouble
Knowing constancy is acceptance
Acceptance is impartiality
Impartiality is sovereign
Sovereign is Heaven
Heaven is Tao
Tao is eternal
The self is no more, without dangerThere is little i can add to this perfect illustration of harmonious relationships, this is not to suggest there are no difficulties to face, there are difficulties in life and these we must find ways of dealing with whether we are in relationships or not, to be true to each other, to be ones 'true self ' (return to roots - constancy and tranquility) this i think allows us to come through such times of turbulence flexibly and yet also strongly, as illustrated i think by chuang tzu's 'waterfall' ~ link story - what do we do but follow the nature of ourselves, each other and 'dao' ... Thank you for letting me waffle on about this; i in no way beleive relationships (romantic ones) are essential in life or to be complete as a person or dao cultivator, this is just where my life is right now and hopefully what i've learnt will help both myself and others to grow, this is all i hope for in sharing this. 
peace to you
beccaxx
www.Taoism.net and Tao Te Ching: Annotated & Explained, published by SkyLight Paths in 2006 pp 167 paragraph 6.
Sunday, 19. July 2009, 01:02:52
I first came across this teaching, or a version of it, many, many moons ago taught to me orally by my 'meditation' sifu before i'd even heard of 'daoism' (she was, and is, a medicine women and shaman of a northern american first persons forest tribe) once i began learning about 'daoism' this teaching kept coming to mind.
anyway something which occured recently, brought it to mind forcefully.
Some people have such turbulence in their lives, their romantic lives, their friendships, life in general, that they conduct their relationships, their lives in a chaotic manner, even if intent is good the methods are often harsh, turbulent and cause more harm than good even though thye might not always intend that harm.
Someone i know had a friend of theirs 'confront' them about a choice that person had made that this person disagreed with vehemently; it should be noted at this time that the problem (though private so confidential) was a small one, a matter of perspective only and any agreement or disagreement moderatly and fairly expressed was imaterial: - Anyway, this 'friend' proceeded to be 'honest', is that way that is fairly horrible to observe, 'honest' as a form of condesention and patronisation, as if the onyl possible way to see the situation was from their perspective, and any compromises offered where worthless, even though the compromise would have eased the situation completely and been much more nourishing to all.
As an observer of these events and having been invovled in one or two myself in both the above roles -- a few thoughts struck me.
In dealing with such situations it is so easy to be lured by pride and ego to respond in kind, or similarly, to 'feed' both the situation and the less nourishing aspects of ourselves.
Sometimes folks who initiated these situations will do so with good intentions and if 'daoists' often use TTC verses such as 81 to explain their actions.Chapter 81
True words are not beautiful
Beautiful words are not true
Those who are good do not debate
Those who debate are not good
Those who know are not broad of knowledge
Those who are broad of knowledge do not know
Sages do not accumulate
The more they assist others, the more they possess
The more they give to others, the more they gain
The Tao of heaven
Benefits and does not harm
The Tao of sages
Assists and does not contendYet in actuality TTC 81 speaks of the opposite of what folks often think, it is not advocating being harsh and contending; if there is a problem we feel firmly about then we have to choose which wolf we let influence our actions and behaviour; which wolf will we feed?
Will we bring contention into our lives and the lives of others; if contention and turbulence is how we interact will we even be aware of how our actions hurt those around us who are not comfortable with turbulent and contentious interactions? Whilst they are baffled by our response and attitude, perhaps we are baffled by their hurt and bafflement, afterall we have only been 'honest'? right? or perhaps we have forgotten what TTC 81 speaks of the sages bearing in mind when action is required -- 'cause and effect' -- once we have been thoughtless of the feelings of others, of friends, loved ones etc, then this often causes hurt and bafflement, even if we feel stringently we are in the 'right' -- the TTC and yi jing, speak both overtly and implicitly about 'cause and effect' and choosing our paths and actions carefully, with thought for those around us, with what buddhists refer to as 'mindfullness' or 'awareness'.
If 'you' (generic label) are in the 'wrong' and someone gave you no benefit of the doubt, cut 'you' no slack and just criticised endlessly whenever that person disagreed, be the issue large or small, would 'you' be more inclined to remember any 'points' raised or just the acrimony exhibited? Human nature being what it is most of us, including advanced dao cultivators remember the acrimony and any points get lost by the wayside.
What if we had what we felt was a 'valid' point that we felt needed consideration and instead of cutting foks no slack, giving no benefit of the doubt, instead of being 'honest' we did it carefully, with awareness, mindfullness and kindness, if the person didn't listen then no harm is done, what the yi jing would call 'no fault' if they do and we create a nourishing situation then we have a situation the yi jing would call 'auspicious'.
In the situation which prompted this post my friend and their 'friend' are barely speaking, avoiding each other and in the words of my friend "i do not know whether 'X' is the person i thought she was, i do not know if i ma the person i thought i was, all i know is these situations have worn me down to a nervous mess around her" -- in such a situation, regardless of whom was 'right' initially there is no 'auspicious' situation ahead nor any 'no fault' either -- ultimatly no-one was 'right' or nourished.
Perhaps, just perhaps, instead of doing it 'honestly but thoughtlessly' and offering no apology when brought to our notice or ignoring and refusing any compromises folks offer or make before we become 'righteous' and 'honest' at people, exhibiting our turbulent preferences, we should think which 'cause and effect' will i begin -- if we wish to be honest we should first ask ourselves 'which wolf will win?'peace to you
beccaxx
Tuesday, 24. March 2009, 01:19:24
Knowing Fish
One day Chuang Tzu and a friend were walking by a river.
"Look at the fish swimming about," said Chuang Tzu, "They are really enjoying themselves."
"You are not a fish," replied the friend, "So you can't truly know that they are enjoying themselves."
"You are not me," said Chuang Tzu. "So how do you know that I do not know that the fish are enjoying themselves?"even chuang tzu had a thing about personal presumptions ...
Odd though but every domestic abuse susrvivor i've spoken with has said that one thing that triggers problems for them is when people make negative persoanl presumptions, the other is when they feel unseen, or only seen from one side and not the full and diverse folks they are. Tends to make them internalise the above and when they don't they feel hurt and often unwelcome. (1 in 3/4 women and 1 in 6/7 men go through hetrosexual spousal abuse in the UK and US, thats one form of abuse, factor in the others thats alot of people, factor in many folks find daoism through therapy thats another load of folks)
How hard is it i wonder to walk a mile in other peoples moccasins and realise that our words we think are so unhurtful and 'mindful' create a wealth of problems we may never know because we're too busy resenting, shouting at and shooting the messenger.
We all do it, even the best and most sincere of intentions backfire from time to time often spectacularly and often in such a massive way folks forget the good we've done and acheived almost instantly.
over the last day or two i've kinda had a crisis of confidence, even basic confidence in basic choices and instincts -- still having it truth be told although writign this blog entry has helped somewhat .... thing is i was begining to seriously doubt my and others perspectives on personal presumptions and their negative impact, i was reading zen blogs for a bit of peace and contemplation, and came across the above from chuang tzu, and you know what, negative personal presumptions are an impertinance at best and deeply wounding at worst any dao cultivator worth their salt would avoid them like the plague where possible, they do no-one any justice at all.
much the same can be said for taking people only on one facet of their knowledge, i've been told it feels like objectification for many; does it hurt us to be more mindful of how we deal with others? God knows i need to work on that as much as anyone else, but what is it ttc 71 says about fault? Chapter 71
To know that you do not know is highest
To not know but think you know is flawed
Only when one recognizes the fault as a fault
can one be without fault
The sages are without fault
Because they recognize the fault as a fault
That is why they are without faultin recognising a fault this is how sages are without fault -- this is not saying sages make no mistakes, but that the very ability to recognise faults and try to learn from them makes what the yi jing calls 'no fault' coupled of course with sincerity of action.
Not sure precicly what has happened but in writing this blog a few thigns have clicked into place, things i've allowed others to dislodge ... go to love this wonderful safe haven 
even if i don't update it as much as i probably aught.
Thanks for bearing with the waffle
peace to you
beccaxx
Wednesday, 28. January 2009, 17:04:05
A short post only, to explore some concepts that possibly are easily misunderstoodChapter 67
Everyone in the world calls my Tao great
As if it is beyond compare
It is only because of its greatness
That it seems beyond compare
If it can be compared
It would already be insignificant long ago!
I have three treasures
I hold on to them and protect them
The first is called compassion
The second is called conservation
The third is called not daring to be ahead in the world
Compassionate, thus able to have courage
Conserving, thus able to reach widely
Not daring to be ahead in the world
Thus able to assume leadership
Now if one has courage but discards compassion
Reaches widely but discards conservation
Goes ahead but discards being behind
Then death!
If one fights with compassion, then victory
With defense, then security
Heaven shall save them
And with compassion guard themI think we all can get this view of compassion as somehow 'fluffy' and 'gentle' and indeed it is and can be, but i think sometimes we make the mistake of shying away from reflecting some home truths out of a misplaced sense of 'gentle' when perhaps the most compassionate thing in the long term is to show someone the true ramifications of their actiosn and behaviours?
This is i think particularly pertinant in cases where multiple innocent people get hurt by the behaviour or one or two people whom no-one has wanted to be 100% honest with regarding the negativity of their own behaviours.
Sometimes in nature we see gentle days, gentle rains and sometimes hard rains whilst causing seeming devestation in the short term allow for positive change and growth in the long term.
Just somethign to consider and in no way is this advising us all to go off half-cocked and laying it on the line for everyone we know, just as nature uses harsh weather at the opportune moments so too must we consider carefully before taking any step that amy cause harm short or long term. Just saying sometimes true compassion is about more than giving someone a cup of tea and a hug.
peace to you
beccaxx
Saturday, 17. January 2009, 12:34:04
Compassion, conflict, Dao
This post is not intended to take a political stance merely a dao cultivation and humanitarian one.
Chapter 67
Everyone in the world calls my Tao great
As if it is beyond compare
It is only because of its greatness
That it seems beyond compare
If it can be compared
It would already be insignificant long ago!
I have three treasures
I hold on to them and protect them
The first is called compassion
The second is called conservation
The third is called not daring to be ahead in the world
Compassionate, thus able to have courage
Conserving, thus able to reach widely
Not daring to be ahead in the world
Thus able to assume leadership
Now if one has courage but discards compassion
Reaches widely but discards conservation
Goes ahead but discards being behind
Then death!
If one fights with compassion, then victory
With defense, then security
Heaven shall save them
And with compassion guard themIt seems that the art of fighting with compassion has long since been lost -- not only do we see various 'freedom fighters/insurgents/terrorists' attacking civilians but now we see a nation state putting their destriction to shame by actually herding civilians into homes and city centres 'for their own safety' and then according to reports given to human rights watch shelling said homes and city centre(s). Then we see southern israel gettign hammered with thankfully inaccurate rockets and thankfully face a much lower injury and death toll than the civilians in gaza whose child death toll is not over 320 and counting.http://www.hrw.org/en/news/2009/01/16/israel-stop-shelling-crowded-gaza-cityThe death toll from yesterday's military operations remains unknown, but media reports quoted Gaza health officials as saying that 70 people had died (the reports make no distinction between civilian and combatant casualties). As of January 14, 1,013 Palestinians had died, including 322 children and 76 women, according to the Gazan Ministry of Health. An additional 4,560 Palestinians reportedly have been wounded, including 1,600 children and 678 women.
The attacks on Gaza City occurred after the Israel Defense Force (IDF) had warned Gaza's residents to flee to city centers. According to the Israeli government, on January 3, the IDF began broadcasting warnings that told people, among other things, that "For your own safety, you are required to leave your homes immediately and move to the city centers." Despite these warnings, the IDF has launched attacks against the Gaza city center, causing civilian casualties.
"Israel warned civilians to go to city centers and later shelled the center of Gaza City with a weapon that should never be used in densely populated areas," Garlasco said. When will we realise that Ghandi was right - "an eye for an eye makes the whole world blind" -- it is true that in daoism and dao cultivation self defense is not frowned upon, but i can't help but feel that the way we are going there will be so much self defense going on that the cycles of hatred, anger and killing of innocents has no hope of ending.
I have no answers but i hope we can all feel empathy for ALL the victims of these conflicts.
Chapter 43
The softest things of the world
Override the hardest things of the world
That which has no substance
Enters into that which has no openings
From this I know the benefits of unattached actions
The teaching without words
The benefits of actions without attachment
Are rarely matched in the worldpeace to you
beccaxx
Monday, 15. September 2008, 14:21:37
One step of dao cultivation that i have found to be invaluble; indeed the root/foundation from which all other lessons have grown from, is to know oneself.
What does it take to know oneself?
It is an on going process but some key elements i have found in knowling myself and growing internally are: -
To accept that if this life is it, it is our one shot when we die we go into the ground and get eaten by worms, decompose into the soil etc .... once one can 100% accept that with no fear (and often it takes some time to accept and unattach from our attachment to living as long as possible come what may) then one has learnt a great deal about oneself, learning how to begin letting go of fear and attchment along the way.
Once we can accept the above we will find it easier in some respects to unattach from people, to learn we can no more hold people or things to us than we can capture the wind; all we can do is get in a mess in the attempt ....
in knowing the above and hence ourselves we can then know how to live life and enjoy each moment, whatever that moment brings.
None of this means we do not love or cherish familiy, friends or lovers - just that we do not grasp onto them - we allow them like the wind to be themselves and walk their own path, sometimes it will be with us sometimes not.
Indeed the above can leads us to the knowledge that as much as we interact with others, and walk alongside them on occasion, we walk similtaneously, alone & as part of the whole - alone and together: -
This is of course just the process explored; the epiphanies we find about ourselves will be in many areas unique to each person. Chapter 33
Those who understand others are intelligent
Those who understand themselves are enlightened
Those who overcome others have strength
Those who overcome themselves are powerful
Those who know contentment are wealthy
Those who proceed vigorously have willpower
Those who do not lose their base endure
Those who die but do not perish have longevitypeace to you
beccaxx
Tuesday, 26. August 2008, 00:53:23
How often do we consciously or sub-consciously allow our fears, issues, insecurities dictate what we do or don't do, do or don't experience?
To just release those fears, inhibitions and feel, experience is one of the central themes to this zen story. One day, while walking through the wilderness, a man encountered a vicious tiger. He ran for his life, and the tiger gave chase.
The man came to the edge of a cliff, and the tiger was almost upon him. Having no choice, he held on to a vine with both hands and climbed down.
Halfway down the cliff, the man looked up and saw the tiger at the top, baring its fangs. He looked down and saw another tiger at the bottom, waiting for his arrival and roaring at him. He was caught between the two.
Two rats, one white and one black, showed up on the vine above him. As if he didn't have enough to worry about, they started gnawing on the vine.
He knew that as the rats kept gnawing, they would reach a point when the vine would no longer be able to support his weight. It would break and he would fall. He tried to shoo the rats away, but they kept coming back.
At that moment, he noticed a strawberry growing on the face of the cliff, not far away from him. It looked plump and ripe. Holding onto the vine with one hand and reaching out with the other, he plucked it.
With a tiger above, another below, and two rats continuing to gnaw on his vine, the man tasted the strawberry and found it absolutely delicious.Of course letting go of living through our fears does not mean being uncautious in life, or to ignore instincts telling us to be careful ... the message is very much about harmony, living without fear whilst bearing in mind, mindfull action, moderation, humility, compassion, awareness of self and so on.
TTC 63 points us to ways we can deal with letting go, baby steps, break things up into bite sized peices and even the most difficult tasks will be easier.
This is also a lesson i think all of us learns and re-learns throughout our cultivation and life; it is certainly one i keep learning and re-learning as i walk this crazy path of dao cultivation and life experiences.
peace to you
beccaxx
Zen story source and full article can be found http://www.taoism.net/living/2003/200301.htm
Wednesday, 4. June 2008, 17:06:24
hi,
Some of you have perhaps been wondering why i haven't been about so often; we have adopted an ex-racing greyhound, who had reached 4 stopped doing well, has scars all over her and was abandoned. She is very nervous and it took along time to get her to come to me in the kennel let alone outside the kennel into the scary world beyond.
but in taking that time to get her trust enough to follow me outside and come meet Jessica (my border collie) and Thom my brother we set foundations, solid foundations, for her future.
By essentially learning about her, by being humble in front of her nervousness (looking away, standing/sitting side on, giving off canine calming signals (licking ones lips, yawning, blinking) ) by showing her moderation, (not pushing her to go faster than felt right for her) and by showing her compassion and caring (loving her for who she was there and then and not loving an illusion of whom she might be or who i wanted her to be) i earned her trust and knowledge about her.
She is now living with us, and those same principles applied through the methods of gentle training mean she is coming on in leaps and bounds at her own pace and for her.
This experience taught me how we take forgranted our wish and often need to enforce our view of a situation, our way of doing things onto others (people and animals) ...
And i thought i wonder what wouldhave happened had i not shown humblness before her nervousness, if i had walked in front facing reaching for her with no regard for her other than superficially.
What if i had not been moderate in taking things a steady pace set by Rhia (her name), had dragged her out of the kennells or tried to instead of being patient enough to earn her trust.
What if instead of loving the nervous dog in front (or to the side of me in this case) i had wanted her to be other than she was and tried to make her express behaviour she was not ready to yet?
Maybe if i did one or all of these things her reaction would be defensive, or perhaps she'd just have slunk away to hide or something else entirly .... and instead of now living with a loving, increasingly curious, slightly playful dog (and she has only been here since sunday morning) things would be very different.
Is this not the same with people though? we have expectations of what a 'taoist' or 'dao cultivator' is or we don't like the labels at all and shy away from labels so much we chastise others who use them ... either way do we not all soemtimes try to force others into our expectations, to go at our pace not theirs, to ignore their feelings ... to in essence ignore some of the most fundemental and central teachings in the TTC.
Perhaps if it works with dogs in this case it might work with people also?
Needless to say the experiences with Rhia are both joyous and humbling, tinged with moderation and lots of mutual compassion and caring. Chapter 67
Everyone in the world calls my Tao great
As if it is beyond compare
It is only because of its greatness
That it seems beyond compare
If it can be compared
It would already be insignificant long ago!
I have three treasures
I hold on to them and protect them
The first is called compassion
The second is called conservation
The third is called not daring to be ahead in the world
Compassionate, thus able to have courage
Conserving, thus able to reach widely
Not daring to be ahead in the world
Thus able to assume leadership
Now if one has courage but discards compassion
Reaches widely but discards conservation
Goes ahead but discards being behind
Then death!
If one fights with compassion, then victory
With defense, then security
Heaven shall save them
And with compassion guard thempeace to you
beccaxx
http://truetao.org/ttc/complete.htm
Photobucket, Rhia's photos
Sunday, 25. May 2008, 22:33:59
In a temple high in the mountians there was sweeper, he was lower than the lowest novice, designated to sweep up the mess the novices and higher monks left behind. Always the sweeper was the butt of jests, and jokes and alwasy he smiled a little smile of amusment at it all. When the sweeper was asked by one quiet novice why he didn;t report them to the higher preists, he asnswered "ahh but with all the abuse i get, they are teaching me My Way as no book or sutra can. So why take offense at the best teachers in the mortal world?"
The young novice, also becomae a sweeper and there like his first true teacher chose to stay, learning the gift of non attachment....
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