My OperaFree Range Ministry
Friday, March 16, 2007 7:11:50 PM
I thought today I would let you know what I've been up to.
First off, let me confess, that I backslid for a period of months. Nothing EXTREMELY bad, but bad enough. It started when I was tempted/offered to smoke some pot. I accepted. I thought "oh this once won't hurt" BUT that once, over a period of time, a SHORT amount of time, turned into a daily thing! Then I stopped reading my Bible and stopped fellowshipping with God, prayers got few and far between. I'll spare you most of the gory details.
Anyway, the Lord got my attention and I wanted to come back to Him. I tried on my own, I asked for forgiveness and pleaded to be forgiven. Then I prayed to Him and told Him if he wanted me to quit smoking pot He was going to have to do it for me, because I was weak and couldn't do it on my own. The next morning I woke up, and I had no desire to smoke pot and I didn't. But then temptation came again, and I accepted. Once again, I felt wretched and ashamed.
So, I didn't smoke anymore, then when temptation came again, it was hard, but I wanted the Lord more than I wanted the pot, so I turned it down. Needless to say, I don't smoke pot anymore.
But that isn't the end of the story! That is just the Begining of the story!
It was hard, but I started reading my Bible again daily, praying and talking to God.
But I didn't feel it in my heart, it seemed like something was still missing, that just quitting the smoking pot wasn't enough. I had no idea what it was! Then one day while in the shower,
I tried to sing a song of praise to the Lord, and it was VERY hard, and I just started crying and I said "Lord, I want to come back to you, but I just can't get there from here, PLEASE HELP ME!" WooHoo!!! He DID! Praise God! I can't really explain what was missing, other than, probably I just wasn't in His Good Graces and that satan was making claim on me. When I cried out to the Lord and admitted I couldn't do it on my own, that I NEEDED HIM! That is when everything started turning around! I'm reading my bible daily, going to church, praying and talking to God, singing songs of praise, worshipping Him and fellowshipping with other Christians again, and most importantly, Am back in God's good grace and loving embrace!
So, that is where I've been.
Now, let me share with you the vision and the calling that God has given me! He has called me to go on the road in a travel trailer, to minister to those that are lost, to be a beacon that guides His lost children out of darkness. It is slow in going, especially getting financing on the travel trailor, since I am on disability and recieve very little money on that. But I know this is His will and that He will make it happen. Yesterday I met with the elders of my church, and they prayed for me and this mission. It is a 12 yr commission. It was my hope that they would be my "sending out church". But it seems that they are not as confident that the Lord has called me to do this as I am! LOL So, now I am still waiting on God to show me what to do next.
I am selling everything I have, except the few things that I will keep with me on the road. My Church has agreed to let me have the sale there, and a few of my sisters in Christ are going to help me get it together and help during the sale. I'm giving up my house, it is a rental, I'm giving up having stability to do this, and I am excited and anxious about it.
I really can't think of any other way I would want to spend the rest of my life than serving the Lord.
Thinking back, I can not imagine how I ever gave up being in His presence for pot! I am not in His constant presence, as I was before, be He has assured me that I will be again soon. I Assure you that this time, I will not give it up for nothing! What I have learned and am learning thru this experience is, how to recognize temptation and satan, and exercising my power and authority over him, as given to me by Jesus Christ.
Which I understand now that I will need in order to help those that are in his grip.
Your prayers for this ministry and for the trailor (the one I want, and I believe that God led me to is the Zoom 718QB) to come through and be blessed as well as being a blessing.
Some say that God doesn't sign checks, but I know He does, just sometimes he uses different names to sign them!
Well, that's my update and confession! Remember we are never so far gone that we are out of God's reach! He has mightly long arms! And He Does Allow U Turn's!
May God Touch And Bless All That Read This, In the name of Jesus, amen
MzDaMzEL
First off, let me confess, that I backslid for a period of months. Nothing EXTREMELY bad, but bad enough. It started when I was tempted/offered to smoke some pot. I accepted. I thought "oh this once won't hurt" BUT that once, over a period of time, a SHORT amount of time, turned into a daily thing! Then I stopped reading my Bible and stopped fellowshipping with God, prayers got few and far between. I'll spare you most of the gory details.
Anyway, the Lord got my attention and I wanted to come back to Him. I tried on my own, I asked for forgiveness and pleaded to be forgiven. Then I prayed to Him and told Him if he wanted me to quit smoking pot He was going to have to do it for me, because I was weak and couldn't do it on my own. The next morning I woke up, and I had no desire to smoke pot and I didn't. But then temptation came again, and I accepted. Once again, I felt wretched and ashamed.
So, I didn't smoke anymore, then when temptation came again, it was hard, but I wanted the Lord more than I wanted the pot, so I turned it down. Needless to say, I don't smoke pot anymore.
But that isn't the end of the story! That is just the Begining of the story!
It was hard, but I started reading my Bible again daily, praying and talking to God.
But I didn't feel it in my heart, it seemed like something was still missing, that just quitting the smoking pot wasn't enough. I had no idea what it was! Then one day while in the shower,
I tried to sing a song of praise to the Lord, and it was VERY hard, and I just started crying and I said "Lord, I want to come back to you, but I just can't get there from here, PLEASE HELP ME!" WooHoo!!! He DID! Praise God! I can't really explain what was missing, other than, probably I just wasn't in His Good Graces and that satan was making claim on me. When I cried out to the Lord and admitted I couldn't do it on my own, that I NEEDED HIM! That is when everything started turning around! I'm reading my bible daily, going to church, praying and talking to God, singing songs of praise, worshipping Him and fellowshipping with other Christians again, and most importantly, Am back in God's good grace and loving embrace!
So, that is where I've been.
Now, let me share with you the vision and the calling that God has given me! He has called me to go on the road in a travel trailer, to minister to those that are lost, to be a beacon that guides His lost children out of darkness. It is slow in going, especially getting financing on the travel trailor, since I am on disability and recieve very little money on that. But I know this is His will and that He will make it happen. Yesterday I met with the elders of my church, and they prayed for me and this mission. It is a 12 yr commission. It was my hope that they would be my "sending out church". But it seems that they are not as confident that the Lord has called me to do this as I am! LOL So, now I am still waiting on God to show me what to do next.
I am selling everything I have, except the few things that I will keep with me on the road. My Church has agreed to let me have the sale there, and a few of my sisters in Christ are going to help me get it together and help during the sale. I'm giving up my house, it is a rental, I'm giving up having stability to do this, and I am excited and anxious about it.
I really can't think of any other way I would want to spend the rest of my life than serving the Lord.
Thinking back, I can not imagine how I ever gave up being in His presence for pot! I am not in His constant presence, as I was before, be He has assured me that I will be again soon. I Assure you that this time, I will not give it up for nothing! What I have learned and am learning thru this experience is, how to recognize temptation and satan, and exercising my power and authority over him, as given to me by Jesus Christ.
Which I understand now that I will need in order to help those that are in his grip.
Your prayers for this ministry and for the trailor (the one I want, and I believe that God led me to is the Zoom 718QB) to come through and be blessed as well as being a blessing.
Some say that God doesn't sign checks, but I know He does, just sometimes he uses different names to sign them!
Well, that's my update and confession! Remember we are never so far gone that we are out of God's reach! He has mightly long arms! And He Does Allow U Turn's!
May God Touch And Bless All That Read This, In the name of Jesus, amen
MzDaMzEL
