WiiU So Serious?
By AntonCaptainSeagull. Friday, April 6, 2012 1:55:40 AM
First off, reports are flying left and right and back and forth about the available RAM and core-chip processors and what kind of salsa Wii U has running any number of shaders, bumpers, and flickers. Some sources are flipping out about how it's friggin twice as powerful, while others are all “psh it's not even half the juice bruh”, all the while all the “Graphic Whores” or self-proclaimed “Hardcore Gamers” in Facebook, Twitter, trolling in forums, or loitering in Gamestops are asking if it runs “a million80p or amillionandone80p? Because my Alienjuarez PC that I transmogulated runs amillionandtwo80p on my Mozart LSD-screen, so whatever, I'll leave the WiiU to the kids based of the facts (see: rumors), while I seclude myself in my captains chair with a 24 pack of Mt.Dew and 19cats to waste all these other CoD19 players” - Dang it! Real good games don't need this junk! Freshified gaming experiences are being thrown out the window because spec wise... RUMORS are saying that it MIGHT be a little less or even on par with current beautiful looking games. Did the Wii destroy everything else? Yes, yes it did. It destroyed everything else. The graph here by vg charts updates itself and shows the total sales since launch of the current gen systems. If all you number-munchers want is numbers, and the biggest numbers win, tell me who won. I can tell you right now, that without looking at the numbers Wii won. So just go back to calling each other duty heads over your headsets, and let video game fans enjoy good games.
Ugh, because the term “hardcore gaming” has pretty much socially evolved into meaning “Guns, Boobs, Cursing, Headset, and Dude-Bro at the same time” I hate that I have skills in serious, intensely difficult games. On the other side of the coin “Casual Gamer” socially evolved into meaning “Imagine Babyz, easy-mode, hello kitty girls at the same time” I hate that I enjoy relaxing, non-adrenaline inducing games like Animal Crossing! Ask any guy named nathan and they'll tell you my town is “The sickest town ever” - sick meaning effing sweet. You don't get the sickest town by eating jelly beans and doing nothing, you play the hell out of the game like a CHAMP, without hacking I might add. Where the heck do I fit in in these terms? Well, since no one has coined the term yet, I call myself a “True Gamer”, I have a gameboy pocket in my everyday backpack with Pokemon Blue because it's FUN, not because I look stylish with a retro video game thingy. I play video games because I like video games! I don't play video games because everyone else is playing that same exact video game, just to fit-in socially because I feel if I don't I'm unpopular are that's like totally not acceptable, now excuse me while I totally like binge drink myself to like acoma at this totally like killur frat party – psyeuh! … which brings me to my next topic...
I call it iGaming. It's all those $1 dollar games that took one guy to make with $5 and sold it a BILLION friggin times because everyone ever has an iPhone, and everyone ever is connected to everyone else and they need to play some game about angry pigeons otherwise they'll be out of the loop, and why not? I mean it only costs a buck right? At one samackeroo it's a good investment I can't argue that... but the dark side is that all of a sudden were back to the idea that all that matters are numbers. Pissed Avians sold jillions of copies, maybe 2 jillians, and if other developers can see the money that... it pains me to call it this... game raked in, especially through merchandising to eight year olds, why not make your own cash-cow shovel-ware title!? And NOW it looks like the only thing people care about in gaming is cheap-no-talent-hearltess iPhone games because jillions (or two) people can't be wrong! But they are. Big Money doesn't see it this way, but they are wrong. iGaming shouldn't even be compared to REAL gaming – ever. It's like comparing the amount of views a youtube video has to the number of views a theatrical movie has. You had to pay to see top quality stuff in the theater, you didn't even have to fart to see the you-tube video, it's not the same thing!
It's crazy to see people calling off the WiiU already based off of some cloudy rumors and un-sourced reports that even if they were true don't mean a thing until the GAMES are played... you know, the reason why the machines exist in the first place, games, most of you tech-crunching-graphic-whores forgot about that part. Get real people, games are boiled down to a simple concept... fun. Vita is much more powerful than 3DS, but Vita is crap, and your precious numbers are telling you this. PSP is technically way better than DS, but the DS murdered the PSP, not to mention how the PSP would have tanked hard if it wasn't for Monster Hunter (a GAME). PS3 and 360 are beasts compared to the tech-specs of Wii, and the Wii owns everything that ever came out (except maybe the graphically less powerful DS).
When the WiiU drops, set your tricorders to “chill-the-eff-out” and just use your natural abilities to gauge how entertaining the machine can be. Even if the machine is 99 times more powerful than the Xbox1080, it shouldn't matter, it should all come down to fun friggin games. That's my plea to give it a chance. If all I wanted to do was give you proof that the console will sell well-enough I got one word for you: