"Something just ain't right about that Boy"

What's up Santa....

Well it's that time of year again, and I'm writing to tell you that I was a good boy this year.....
NO, REALLY!. I paid my taxes, gave to charity, helped a couple of friends out in a pinch and even finally learn to quit messing with the helicopter pilots while still in the air.
I quit gambling, don't smoke any more and cut way back on the drinking........well kinda........Ok, two out of three ain't bad.

I even did a few good deeds this year..... I took in a stray black kitten that was surely destined to be some alligator's lunch, and gave her a good home. And then there was that little old lady I helped cross the street one day...(The Judge dropped the assault and purse snatching charges after I explained I was just trying to get her to the other side of the street).
How the hell was I to know she was just standing there waiting for the bus?

And I did the "Green Thing" this year too. I put two solar panels on my roof to do my part so the north pole wouldn't melt because I didn't want you, Mrs. C. and all the little elves to fall into the deep, dark, cold water and die of Hypothermia.
To bad I had to cut down all the trees to get enough sun it to make them work.
I even quit dropping firecrackers off the balcony to terrorize the raccoons that like to have their little orgies on my patio at 3am on the morning.

So, as you can clearly see Santa, I have finally turned over a gigantic new leaf, so to speak.
Which brings me to the point of this letter....and don't worry....I'm not asking for that friggin pony again this year. After forty years, I GET THE MESSAGE!
But I've done ok for myself and I can buy any damn pony I want now!

So, what I would like to ask for this year is a playmate for my kitten.........a bunny.
To be specific......a Playboy Bunny.
Now, I'm not going to be picky, <Santa inserts Bunny of the month > or any month will do.
I think they're all blondes anyway.

I promise to pet her, feed her, give her a bath everyday, and keep her nice and warm at night.
I'll play with her a lot, take her for rides in the car and buy her some tight sweaters so as not to catch cold and get sick.

I know I haven't been so good at times in the past, but you owe me big time Santa for waiting all those years for that Danm Pony!

Have a Good Trip!

Your Boy,
P2


P. S.
Santa, if you decide to make a pit stop again this year when you come by P2's pad,
PLEASE FLUSH! Gees!
What's Mrs. C. feeding you up there anyway?