Moving on Out!
Friday, April 27, 2012 7:26:46 PM
I'm moving out in 5 days.
Hmm. Maybe if i type it bigger it'll sink in more.
I'm moving out in 5 days.
Nope, still no difference! It's so weird, surreal almost. It feels like... not real. Which is what surreal means but i'm emphasizing here! It feels like someone's going to call me and be like, "Oh! You thought you were moving out and escaping your crappy town and actually getting a real job?! Things like that don't happen to you! Now give all your housewarming gifts back to those good people and go cower in that dark corner." It sounds morose and pathetic, but i guess just because it's a different feeling, something that i need to get used to. By Tuesday. I mean, i'm chomping at the bit to pack my stuff and see my room all empty (like a cool American sitcom, or like when Andy from Toy Story went to college). And now it also doesn't help that my mom has been down with back problems since Tuesday.. she's got some inflamed nerve in her neck and leaking lumbers... and obviously as the daughter, i feel like it's my responsibility to look after her and see that the house is cleaned up etc as the men in my family would happily live in a radio active cesspool if it meant never having to lift a finger to clean! Then i worry when i leave who would look after her bla bla bla... But like my cousin who moved to the UK told me, moms (and parents in general) are a lot tougher than we think them to be and find ways to cope without us there. Although i can see my parents possibly starving on Fridays as i'm ALWAYS the one who has to go get the take outs. They will not MOVE no matter what!
Also, i can never move back home now. I have a fridge! A couch! A double bed that prolly wont fit in my room! So i HAVE to make this job and everything else work like nothing before. And i know i will, my character is such that if i want something bad enough, i will make it work and happen. It's just still slightly terrifying starting a new job, but everyone feels that. Unless you work for your parents, i guess. Or, unless your dad is Joseph Frtizl or something. Eeek.
But yes, i have basically everything... I just need a few things like pots, a microwave and other random kitchen things. People have been really good to me with gifts, i'm so appreciative of that. It also feels weird to have so much... stuff. It's like before hand, if a tornado wiped out my house i'd be like okay, meh, i only had the stuff in my room... but now! I have a whole flatful of stuff! But oddly enough, i dont feel attached to this stuff yet, maybe because i haven't used it yet or whatever but it's still just replaceable stuff to me. I still dont get how people get attached to material things to the point of craziness. Steal my stuff, i dont care, just leave my Mac. And my books.
I'M MOVING OUT IN 5 DAYSSSS!