Skip's Home Studio.

First, we survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they carried us and lived in houses made of asbestos....

They took aspirin, ate blue cheese, raw egg products, loads of bacon and processed meat, tuna from a can, and didn't get tested for diabetes or cervical cancer.

Then after that trauma, our baby cots were covered with bright coloured lead-based paints.

We had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets or shoes, not to mention, the risks we took hitchhiking.

As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags.

We drank water from the garden hose and NOT from a bottle.

Take away food was limited to fish and chips, no pizza shops, McDonalds , KFC, Subway or Nandos.

Even though all the shops closed at 6.00pm and didn't open on the weekends, somehow we didn't starve to death!

We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this.

We could collect old drink bottles and cash them in at the corner store and buy Toffees, Gobstoppers, Bubble Gum and some bangers to blow up frogs with.

We ate cupcakes, white bread and real butter and drank soft drinks with sugar in them, but we weren't overweight because......

WE WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!!

We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on.

No one was able to reach us all day. And we were O.K.

We would spend hours building our go-carts out of old prams and then ride down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes. We built tree houses and dens and played in river beds with matchbox cars.

We did not have Playstations, Nintendo Wii , X-boxes, no video games at all, no 999 channels on SKY , no video/dvd films, no mobile phones, no personal computers, no Internet or Internet chat rooms..........WE HAD FRIENDS and we went outside and found them!

We fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no
Lawsuits from these accidents.

Only girls had pierced ears!

We ate worms and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever.

You could only buy Easter Eggs and Hot Cross Buns at Easter time...

We were given air guns and catapults for our 10th birthdays,

We rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just yelled for them!

Mum didn't have to go to work to help dad make ends meet!

RUGBY and CRICKET had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!! Getting into the team was based on MERIT

Our teachers used to hit us with canes and gym shoes and bully's always ruled the playground at school.

The idea of a parent bailing us out if we broke the law was unheard of.

They actually sided with the law!

Our parents didn't invent stupid names for their kids like 'Kiora' and 'Blade' and 'Ridge' and 'Vanilla'

We had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and we learned HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL !

And YOU are one of them! CONGRATULATIONS!

It sure is windy today. I have just seen a small bird trying to fly backwards!

I am being given a portable amp so I can play my electro-acoustic badly even louder. No, it will help me to improve as it will highlight mistakes more. Plus the guitar has a graphic equaliser on it, so I can find out what it can do.

Not feeling too good today (it has been coming on this last couple of days) and so I must take things easy for a little while to stop it getting any worse again. It is a bind. But not to worry, I will be o.k.

Never forget that 'Love conquers all', for the Earth and for each other.

NINE WORDS WOMEN USE




(1)

Fine:

This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2)

Five Minutes:

If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3)

Nothing:

This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

(4)

Go Ahead:

This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

(5)

Loud Sigh:

This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men.. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6)

That's Okay:

This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7)

Thanks:

A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' . that will bring on a 'whatever').

(8)

Whatever:

Is a woman's way of saying F--- YOU!

(9)

Don't worry about it, I'll do it:

Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself.. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?'


For the woman's response refer to # 3.

It is official, the icecaps will be gone in the Summer within the next ten years. The polar bears rely on the sea ice for hunting. Well done 'world' (not). At last the scientists are waking up to actual reality and there will be no white caps on the Earth at this time, just blue. The average temperatures are rising twice as fast as anywhere else. The largest single block of ice in the Artic, the Ward Hunt Ice Shelf, had been around for the past 3,000 years before it started cracking in 2000. Within two years it had split all of the way through and is now breaking into pieces. Not only are the polar bears effected but also the other wildlife there and the Inuits who's life relies on hunting. It can not be repaired, the damage has already been done.

We got complimentary tickets (received with gratitude) to attend the last show of the season at the Hippodrome Circus, last night. It really was a wonderful show and the only animals were human. We laughed and cheered throughout, as it was the performers' skills and efforts being shown. A magician got into an 'under-sized' round basket (like snake charmers tradionally use) and his assistant ran a few swords with the blades on fire through it. The basket caught gently alight from one of the swords and the act suddenly seemed to go into overdrive. The act finished with the flaming swords being removed and the magician pop out, sharpish and blew the fame out. Anyway, it was a really enjoyable show, from the start to the end.

It has been amazing gardening this week, with load of butterflies flying around me (very romantic, eh?). Anyway with lots of loverly butterflies comes lots of hungry caterpillars. It is a good thing there are plenty of nasturtiums that they are feeding on. Then along come the birds to feed on the caterpillars = hey, it's a jungle out there.
I had to get the lawnmower out today = I am helping to shave the planet.

My doctor said he was giving me pills that I will have to take one a day for the rest of my life. What worries me is, he only gave me 6!

My friend says she has swine flu, but I think she is telling porkies

You know when you have got swine flu when you wake up with an apple in your mouth and you come out in rashers. You may also have a temperature and be bacon.

I tried ringing the NHS direct but all I got was crackling.

Treatment includes an oinkment. However all cases to date have been mild, it’s really s’nowt to worry about.

Apologies if you are getting boared by all the hype of this current snoutbreak!

None of that Sissy Crap.


Are you tired of those sissy 'friendship' poems that always sound good,

but never actually come close to reality?


Well, here is a series of promises that actually speak of true friendship.


You will see no cutesy little smiley faces on this card-

Just the stone cold truth of our great friendship.



1.

WHEN YOU ARE SAD

-- I will help you get drunk and plot revenge against the nasty git who made you sad.


2.

WHEN YOU ARE BLUE

-- I will try to dislodge whatever is choking you.


3.

WHEN YOU SMILE

-- I will know you are plotting something that I want to be involved in.


4.

WHEN YOU ARE SCARED

-- I will tease you about it every chance I get.


5.

WHEN YOU ARE WORRIED

-- I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be until you quit whining.

6.

WHEN YOU ARE CONFUSED

-- I will use little, tiny words.

7.

WHEN YOU ARE SICK

-- Keep away from me until you are well. I don't want whatever you hav

8.

WHEN YOU FALL

-- I will probably point at you and loudly laugh my head off..

9.

THIS IS MY OATH
... I pledge it to the end 'Why?' you may ask; 'because you are my friend'.



Friendship is like peeing your pants, everyone can see it, but only you can feel its true warmth.

Remember:


A friend will help you move. A really good friend will help you move a body.


Let me know if I ever need me to bring a shovel...

....And I'm feeling fine. (R.E.M.).


So the 'world', that has been spending money that is not there, is now suffering a serious recession? Well, no suprises there. I have always blamed the 'Romans' with their 'have what we have' invasions.
Give me the natural life every time.

And the Earth is going through her natural cycle of change. So peoples' time here is extremely short and what are they doing with the time? Still fighting amongst themselves, killing each other, for what? All people on this Earth has the natural right to be here to enjoy natural happiness. Passing a smile is the very best use of our natural energy.

According to records and the Mayan calendar, there is a devastating universal event that is due around the Winter Solstice in 2012.

Love and Peace to All (please pass it on).

(This was written by a black gentleman in Texas).


When I was born, I was black.

When I grew up, I was black.

When I went in the sun, I stayed black.

When I got cold, I was black.

When I was scared, I was black.

When I was sick, I was black.

And when I die, I will still be black.



NOW, you 'white' folks....

When you are born, you are pink.

When you grow up, you are white.

When you go in the sun, you get red.

When you are cold, you turn blue.

When you are scared, you are yellow.

When you get sick, you are green.

When you bruise, you turn purple.

And when you die, you look gray.


So who y'all calling COLOURED?