Suntana's Blog Trek

I can just hear my youngest sister when she reads this Post. She's gonna go, "WHAT? You did WHAT? You did not. DID you? You DID? Seriously? You're lying. You're NOT? Were you crazy? What possessed you to do that?" Now what could I have possibly done that will most assuredly have my sister saying that?

I'll mischievously let that tease y'all for now. It's funny how I even came about choosing this topic about which to write my Post. There I was today wondering what I was going to Blog about. I knew my Post would already be a tad late from the usual release time that I prefer and when my readers expect to read my Posts. What could possibly make up for the delay? I quickly went, "I know! My readers just love to read about me in embarrassing, tight situations that make me squirm or have me fuming at someone. Fine! That's what I'll give them. But, what? What story? Which incident." I was back to square one.

Enter Jimi Hendrix … 60s Guitar Wizard. My friend Peppermint aka Linda (L2D2) and I had been discussing Jimi Hendrix on Darko's (gdare) Blog. We were having this detailed, court-like discussion as to whether Jimi Hendrix actually played the guitar with the guitar strings strung upside down, in inverse order from the Norm or not since he was Left-handed. After several rounds of that, I decided to cleverly ease the topic over to Geometry, which between Darko and I, is Code for Women. Peppermint pretends to be annoyed, but is secretly amused by that Code.

So yes, there I was, tossing around the possible topics for my Blog Post. None of them were really singing to me, at least not for this particular week. I have to feel a topic for a particular week. Suddenly it dawned on me, "Heyyy! Jimi Hendrix … Left-handed … Women! Why, of course! It's been under my nose all this time. By Jove, that's it!" The way I figured, it wasn't just coincidence that I was having that Jimi Hendrix discussion on Darko's – Blues Time Post, which just happened to be subtitled – They Say It's All About a Woman. It was my cue to Blog about … Well, y'all will see. Muhahahahahah!

It's SHOWTIME!

They say it's all about a woman … familiar phrase, right? It is said that guys will do almost anything for a woman. Many times they will make fools out of themselves, all for a woman. And that's what this Blog Post is about. Yep, yours truly, Suntana committed a stupid, ridiculous, foolish, unbelievable, idiotic stunt … all to presumably impress a woman. No wait. She wasn't JUST a woman. She was as the Bee Gees used to sing - More Than a Woman ... More than a woman to me. She was a Vision of Cuteness. She was perhaps my destiny, so much so that she even happened to now live in the exact same house where I used to live before. Man! Thinking back on this, I seriously cannot believe I did this. This is so stupidly embarrassing that I almost want to back out of this. But, it's too late now.

Did I ... forget to mention that this actually took place in my 3rd Grade year in elementary school? I did? Oh, well then, this actually happened in my 3rd Grade year. That's what I meant by she was More Than a Woman. She was my 3rd Grade Crush. We had just moved from New Mexico back to the same little Texas town where we had lived before. We had only lived in New Mexico for half a year. Since it was the same elementary school I had previously attended, I of course knew pretty much everyone. Everyone that is, except for this new girl. I'll call her Sookie. As I was to find out, she happened to live in the same house my family used to live before we moved to New Mexico. Her Dad was now the Farm Mechanic at that farm where my Dad had been the Farm Mechanic.

Cutie Sookie had immediately caught my eye. I was enthralled … Okay, enthralled as much as a 3rd Grade boy can be. Right, like I said, a Crush. How enthralled was I? How much of a goner was I? How foolish would I get? What would I do to impress Cutie Sookie? Well, one day, the class somehow got on the topic of Lefthanders. The teacher then inquired, "Who all here is Left-handed?" Three hands went up: Ralph's, Jean's and … and mine. Excuse me?! Did I say MINE? MY hand went up? In response to who was Left-handed? WTF? Why was MY hand up? I'm NOT Left-handed!

:::Sigh::: Aiy Aiy Aiy Caramba! I had just done a foolish thing, hadn't I? Lying to the teacher and in front of all my classmates, I had just claimed to be Left-handed when I obviously wasn't. WHY? Why would I do such a stupid, ridiculous, foolish thing? I'm amazed that none of the students who knew me didn't go, "WHAT? Carlos, you're NOT Left-handed." But, Nope! No one seemed to recall that I was actually very much Right-handed.

Anyway, as to why I did that ill-advised stunt? No, it wasn't temporary insanity … NOT per se. When the teacher had made her inquiry, on that spur of the moment, I had decided it would be impressive to Sookie that I was Left-handed. I have no idea if it impressed her or not. But, one thing for sure, I had now gotten myself into a Texas-sized pickle of a conundrum. Just exactly how the Fugg was I now going to pull off being a Lefthander when I wasn't?

Can y'all imagine me being sent up to the FRONT of the classroom to work out a Math problem on the Chalkboard … with my Left Hand? YES, that's what I had now forced myself into having to do. It wasn't easy, but I managed writing BIG numbers on the Chalkboard with my Left Hand. Granted, they obviously had a Chicken Scratch low quality to them, but everyone seemed to buy the charade. Now, completing written work on paper was much tougher. That's right. Writing small letters and numbers with my Left Hand on paper was a lot more difficult. Whenever possible, most of the time I would hunch over my paper and sneak in writing with my Right Hand when I gathered no one was looking.

Oh what a tangled web we guys weave when we first practice to impress a Woman, a Girl, a Cutie.
Sheesh! If there was a plus side to this inane, numbskull stunt of mine, it was that I only had to go with the charade for the 2nd half of the school year since that was when we had moved there and that was when I had made the claim. The next school year, now in the 4th Grade and with a new teacher, I wasn't about to try and maintain the charade. I just basically said, "Fugg It" and resumed my Right-Handedness and no one was the wiser. No one ever went, "Heyyy! Weren't you Left-handed last year?"