Saturday, 2. February 2008, 12:17:09
nightmare, horror, emotion
I still hear you, even when you don't talk to me.
I hear, your silent screams at night, alone in the dark. The cries of pain, that your eyes don't dare show.
Worry, anguish, fear - I hear you, I can hear them all. I can hear your heart beating. I can hear your heart stopping and skipping.
I hear the darkness, creeping around the corner, slowly approaching you. It has nothing to hurry for. I can hear you, waiting patiently for it. Your trembles in the dark, underneath the covers of the bed, I can hear them, I can hear your anticipation. You're waiting, you are ready.
I hear the air as you fall down into the pits, into the dark void, spread behind you. I hear no screams, no cries of pain. I can't feel, I cannot hear myself, it's all empty.
I hear you still... But I see myself.
Thursday, 1. November 2007, 23:44:01
digital, horror, story
( Zee work is in progress - Zee rambles collection, zee practicularly stupid ones. )
This will probably not going to come out the way I wanted it to. Then again, why would it matter what my intention is - the feeling and the result are all that matters. They say that the way to somethingy is paved with good intentions. I can only assume that the somethingy is not exactly positive.
I have no good intentions. My intentions are cruel, seething with fury, hate, fear, depression. It's what could happen to people faced with something they wouldn't know how to deal with, or so I think. And it is because I, like you all, am a victim of the digital age.
Faceless, clueless, ignorant, exiting and enticing. Illusions are the first weapon. Illusions that substitute your reality and entice you into ways unfit, but undiscovered. An addict - that's what I am, clearly - by doing this post I just proved I am lost to the temptation. Because - midnight confessions - they never heal the soul. What you believe - is fantasy.
Fantastical creations of the human genius, the symbols of intellectual superiority, progress, civilisation. The symbols of soullessness, ignorance, degradation and humiliation. The ultimate creations - destroyers of mankind.
Take a look at the toys around you - right before your eyes - the toys are real.
Faceless, soulless communication, virtualized into a bitstream - a substitute for a normal human contact. The one that hides your limits and fears away from you. The one that makes you all truly equal - a falsified, faceless imitation of a human being. A human being lost and most of all - alone. Alone in his mind, even if not physically. A spiteful picture, an illusion, a grotesque of its own potential. A lie.
It's a horror. The fear taking in all of us, that we might not be fit for even this petty existence, that we might be outcasts in a non-existing world. Slaves of the electric potential difference, of formulas and dedicated minds. Whipped down by our fears and incompetences, by the illusions of our ancestors, by the lack of dreams that show desire. By lack of passion, thought, or desire to be a being you yourself created. Fear that shakes you to your core, makes a freezing wave crawl up all your nerves, raising goosebumps on your skin, panicking you, cold sweat slowly crawling down your neck. It's a nightmare, but your eyes are open, there's no escape in waking up. There's no escape outside of the virtual machine of human destruction. Deliver us to evil - deny us of our faith.
The world that offers you the illusion that nothing is as bad as you thought, as you were taught, as you were forced to believe. An illusion that talking with someone through an essentially crippled series of bits would give you the experience of spending 5 minutes with them. The illusion that typing will match the touch of your fingers. The illusion that distances don't matter, that everything could be the way it always used to. That what you do doesn't matter. Trickery.
Our past is our future - left behind, lost in time. Will we surrender? Abandon this - don't be a victim of the digital age. I don't want to live virtualized all the time, to find false substitutes to talking with people. Having a meal, having a drink, a chat, a brawl. Go o u t s i d e.
