Software Development

Correcting The Future

If Programming Languages Were Famous Movie Killers

Different languages, different famous killers.

COBOL


Jason Voorhees (Friday the 13th)

He just refuses to die. People watched you die and never helped. Still, you keep coming back. Although at one time you may have talked a lot, you never speak anymore. Yet your actions are still as methodical and predictable as ever. One by one, you record revenge on those that did you wrong. No one is quite the same after having met you.

C


Hannibal Lecter

He is very particular about how he goes about his business. Every detail must be carefully taken into account. Sometimes, he takes on a different face, but that's only to cover up what's truly going on behind the scenes. He'll try to explain things, but no one wants to listen to him.

C++


Nurse Annie Wilkes (Misery)

Her patients are the object of her affection, but this turns to obsessiveness. She prevents her locals from leaving or contacting the rest of the world, encapsulating them in a world of despair. She even destroys children. Eventually, the whole thing ends up self-destructing and only the lucky survive.

Assembly


Michael Myers

He can wear many different masks, but it's not like you can't recognise him. No one knows why he does the things he does. He just does. He's extremely quick. He could be in another city and when you turn around, he's in front of you. He doesn't run, he executes. Also, he only recognises his own family though that's not always a good thing. Most people just stay clear.

Java


Chucky

He is just a toy that tries to act real. He's tried to change forms many times and is still doing so. Randomness is key to understanding Chucky. Most of the time, he's just a sad case but ends up hurting a lot of people that thought they were safe. He's simply a work in progress always being patched back together. Oh, and he's damn annoying.

Lisp


Freddy Krueger

Although world famous and beloved, he is quite simply a nightmare. Most people that have come into contact with him are still in dream land. None of the things they believe in are true. Those that escaped did so at great personal cost. It's still a wonder how people can find such an ugly repulsive person attractive.

Perl


Predator

He's an alien from another world and likes to use all sorts of gadgets and snort off-world drugs. He is sure to play mind games and only the clever survives. Unfortunately, the longer you play the game, the more likely you are that you won't come out alive. And even if you live, you'll wonder what it was all for.

PHP


Xenomorph (Alien series)

He can control a great many species on several different worlds and environments. Unfortunately, he'll turn you inside out. You'll end up doing things you never thought possible but for all the wrong reasons. He looks dumb (and evil), but is insidiously calculating. If you don't watch what you're doing, you'll find yourself being used without your knowledge. Corporate greed will make sure that this beast never dies.

Project V RedefinedWhere Do I Put This?

Comments

Vorlath Sunday, April 6, 2008 3:22:07 PM

I don't know enough for C# or a few of the other more popular languages. If people want to make suggestions as well, feel free and give your take on those suggestions so that I can add them in.

Anonymous Sunday, April 6, 2008 6:43:02 PM

Anonymous writes: Ada Big Brother of 1984 Not a real person, but lives within all his followers. If you forget he's watching, its already too late. He demands absolute obedience, and will lovingly correct those who err innocently. If he deems you worthy of death, he will first cleanse your mind of your sins, and then lay you to rest. Perhaps a more fitting character would be the Jigsaw Killer from Saw (since I believe there are no 1984 movies)? I dunno, just experimenting with that one.

Vorlath Sunday, April 6, 2008 7:46:40 PM

I'm gonna try to add Modula II and Basic. Can't believe I forgot basic. FORTRAN and APL too.

Vladasvladas Thursday, April 10, 2008 10:30:06 PM

Trying to imagine JavaScript monster...

Perhaps this monster is your self. It converts you in a self-monster who think he is capable to do everything. Unfortunately, everything has its limits and finally you hit up to the wall of browser.

Robert Hurleyrfhurley Wednesday, May 7, 2008 1:11:59 AM

C# is Wiley Cayote

Anonymous Wednesday, June 17, 2009 3:08:25 PM

Anonymous writes: wen i was 3 years old my sis and my bro wer watchin tv and i snook into the sitinroom and they wer watchin CHUKY wen i wnt to bed tat night i tore my chuky poster from rugrats now im over it now and wen i watch it now i laugh lol

Anonymous Friday, January 1, 2010 5:26:23 AM

Анонімний writes: Thank you, it's very astonishing description about this post it might be very obliging for students. Recently i needed professional resume service . To my admirable surprise, resume was estimable the price I paid for it.

How to use Quote function:

  1. Select some text
  2. Click on the Quote link

Write a comment

Comment
(BBcode and HTML is turned off for anonymous user comments.)

If you can't read the words, press the small reload icon.


Smilies

February 2012
S M T W T F S
January 2012March 2012
1 2 3 4
5 6 7 8 9 10 11
12 13 14 15 16 17 18
19 20 21 22 23 24 25
26 27 28 29