Wakas Thoughts on Life and Love and All Things in Between

So the day has arrived.

Mrs Jawaka and WJ have set sail and will arrive on English shores tomorrow AM. A wonderfull time will be had by them both Im sure.

For my self?......Work is done for the week, the dogs are fed watered and walked, so I dont have to leave the house till tomorrow!!........Fantastic!!........unless of course I see any daylight in the beer section of the fridge that I mentioned earlier.

After much consideration I have decided to start my 'bachelors' weekend slowly.

Tomorrow will be the big blow out day, so turning up for the occassion as 'match fit' as possible is the sensible way to go I think

Its a huge sporting occassion + massive bender day at the local bar tomorrow!!

The sporting occasion is the RUGBY UNION SIX NATIONS CHAMPIONSHIP. To cut a long story short Scotland (my home country) started as a team who were in it to make up the numbers, and tomorrow play a game that could take them a whisker from being CHAMPIONS!!

I still cant beleive it!!..............If u are of a sporting nature here is a link that will clue you up a little on the SIX NATIONS............http://news.bbc.co.uk/sport1/hi/rugby_union/international/default.stm

So my bags are packed for my trip to my local and I am good to go!!
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All the same, I have whipped out the 'to do list' and started at the top.


Order the pizza with my favourite topping (Tuna and Pineapple) ??...........CHECK!

Honour the great Freddy Heineken by getting myself on the outside of more than my fair share of his beers??.........CHECK!

Take my time to write a little blog without WJ tugging on my sleeve?...........CHECK!

Indulge in some quiet 'after pizza' herbal refreshment?? (which of course is perfectly legal here)...........CHECK!!


But start slowly it is for me. A lovely friday night at home.

Since I started to write this blog 15 mins ago the Pizza has arrived, and let me tell you it looks and smells fantastic!!


IM THINKING MY DAY IS GONNA GO SOMETHING LIKE THIS:

After a quality sleep tonight leap out of bed at the crack of 11:30am.

Take my sleepy self a good half hour to wake up, a nice change from the 1 minute 54 seconds that I usually enjoy.
After waking up I'll take the dogs for a very long walk (it may be some time before they see me again) followed by breakfast, a long shower and a quick 20 mins of 'domesticated entertainment'.

With the house spotless and a spot of lunch it will be time to head off to the bar, getting there 2 hours before kick off of course.

You need time and a few beers to mentally prepare for these big games!!!

It would be foolish of me to even try and predict what is going to happen after 4:30pm (my time) when the referee blows his whistle to start the BIG GAME..........So I wont!!

As soon as I have recovered you will be the first to hear all about it


Take care all & remember the story about the Tortoise and the Hare.


Wakajawaka

In 2 days time, my lovely partner Mrs Jawaka and our beautifull daughter Junior Waka, hop onto a large boat, hoist the main sail, and set off towards Englands shores for a 6 day trip to visit Mrs J's folks.

Ahh bliss!! I hear you cry!!.........No crazy 3 yr old to chase after, and a house full of all round peace and quiet.

In the past when they have gone on similar trips, leaving muggins here to go to work and take care of the crazy dogs, the announcement of their impending departure has left me feeling that despite the work and the dog care, I am in some small way ON VACATION!!

Within minutes I get busy planning. I'm like General Stormin fuckin Norman on speed!

I whip out the calendar and check off dates for all the uninterupted sports coverage I can enjoy.

I dream of which topping Im gonna have on my pizza ever fucking night of the week for the duration of their trip.

I look forward to my stroll down the road to rent a movie WITHOUT having to discuss with Mrs J which one we are gonna watch.

My bags are already packed, ready for my trip to my local bar knowing it doesnt matter in the slightest what time I crawl home.

And then of course my favourite part............SLEEPING LATE ON SATURDAY MORNIING!

This does indeed all sound very Eutopic to a guy like me!

The way it doesnt add up though is like this.........There trip lasts for 6 days and all of the shit I have listed above, I will cram into the first 24 hours!.


Once I have watched the movie & the sport, gorged on the pizza, drank a bath full of beer and woken up whenever the fuck I feel like it???.............I JUST WANT THEM HOME AGAIN!!


My family means EVERYTHING to me. Among the many other great points, they keep me very very grounded and well focused.

Without them I shudder to think what my life would be like sometimes.

During the day I would be dragging my unmotivated ass into work (if I could be bothered getting out of bed) , and in my free time I would be like the pages of that best selling 'good living' manual........'The Keith Richards Guide To A Healthy Lifestyle' (available at all good book stores).

Oh yes!!.......Make no mistake.......It would be the healthy life for me and no messing around!!


It would be 3 square meals a fortnight and brushing my teeth with Heineken before (maybe) heading off to work.
My crusty jocks would be getting turned inside out, buying me 24 more hours before having to approach the fucking washing machine.

Exercise would consist of a reluctant slouch down to the corner store everytime I could see daylight in the beer section of the fridge.
What am I talking about???.......The beer section of the fridge would simply become known as...... THE FRIDGE!

Only thing keeping the beer company in there would be a single tomatoe that had been there so long that it had fucking reproduced, and was now standing there arguing with itself about hygiene in the kitchen!!


Like every single time before..........I cant wait to have the house to myself.......for a minute!!


The live sport will be a great game! The pizza, the best! The movie, one Ive wanted to see for a long time! The bath full of beer down my local bar?, as I said, my bags are already packed! And the huge amount of hours of quality 'shut eye' to top it off!!

But after that???..........................


'Quality time' to yourself really only is quality time if it comes in small and somehow well earned doses.


When it DOES come along we should grab it, and munch on it, and drink too much of it, and sleep too long on it, and enjoy it in any other way you can think of!!


Im sure going to enjoy mine


Having the house to myself will be wonderful................for a minute!



Take care all & always remember to tip the Pizza man


Wakajawaka

For the second time in my life, I am very proud and excited to be living with the realisation that in a few short months, Im going be a parent.
If you have children then I need not bang on about what an incredible feeling that is. If you have no children, then take my word for it, it is a feeling like no other.

I am once again walking around with my head in the clouds feeling like I am the only guy in the world who this has ever happened to.

Physically though........I of course, feel exactly the same as I did on New Years day. The day I was told the wonderfull news.

While I stand on the porch smoking a cigarrette, drinking a cold beer and contemplating what an excellent father I am going to be, my beautifull partner struggles with fatigue and an almost constant sore back, while at the same time wondering where she can buy a bra large enough and strong enough to cope with her ever growing breasts, which before long will be the size of watermelons.


Lets face it guys! Regardless of how sympathetic to her cause we are, during the nine month term, we are fucking spectators.

We try and say the right things and do the right things at the right time.

Every once in a while though, for the sake of world peace, if we are smart, we will figure its time to give her some time to herself.

In my experience, at this point the sensible option is to take yourself down to your local bar for the next few hours to contemplate the joys of impending fatherhood over a couple of cold ones.

While my beautifull partner questions my commitment to the cause, just because my back is just fine and my man boobs are under control, she fails to realise the mental preperation taking place behind the scenes.

She KNOWS Im totally commited, but part of the deal does seem to be a little moan here and there because there wont be any stretch marks on my boobs at the end of the day.

I doubt that that is the reason of course. But there IS a reason.

If I look at the big picture then the most wonderful part of the whole 'parenthood' experience for me is that you have given life to a complete individual.

Children only become mini versions of there parents because they are encouraged to be.

THAT IS MY WORST NIGHTMARE!

'Tennis mothers' are the kind of people I have in mind here.


To live your life through your child just because you didnt quite make it in the tennis world or on the beauty circuit?
That kind of behaviour should be a criminal offence.

What could be worse than a mini version of yourself running around when you could have a complete and unique individual?

If you have children, or are planning to do so...........PLEASE encourage them to be THEMSELVES........Before we question there abilities we should take a look at the fucked up world that our children will inherit from us.


SNEEZING: Sneezing is something I do EVERY day.......... EVERY SINGLE DAY!

This suits me very well as I do happen to LOVE sneezing. Apart from an orgasm, it is the most wonderfull 'natural' rush in the body that I have experienced.

Think about that wonderfull feeling you get about ONE SECOND after you sneeze. A huge amount of endorphines are released giving way to a wonderfull 'rush' lasting about 3 seconds.

If you have never experienced this before then take a look out for it the next time you sneeze. I guarantee you will never look back.

My record is nine big sneezes in a row and at the moment im in training to go for the 10.

I will keep you posted on my progress


Take care folks and always respect the kids.


Wakajawaka