if one day this page is empty for a long time, I just wanted to say "keep yourselves well"

Ehm...okay what i will write here?
..(searching idea)
(ready)
Okay, i found now, something that i will drop here is the new page in my life...i am grow old so i am grow up 2

it's sound like me for time pass, i am the weird girl coz i am very rare to smile with another person.
in years pass almost half of my life, i was spent with pain ******** and thinning of the stomach wall
, i am going with the damn medicine everyday , it's hard to pass and you know
how sad when i know that almost have no hope of well .

but, did you hear i said almost so is there any hope for me even it's a little hope
then I gave it all to God and I believe that I will recover

I do not want to sit still to wait and weep for all,I believe God will give the best for me. I am not regret, if I must die then let that be the will of God in my life.

Time passes...
(it's picture of me when I go through it all)

so many thing that was happening in my life and i was ending this with smile LOL
in the end of 2009 and in my 23 years old i had the great thing and it's make joy...
i am on recovery processing now and i didn't feel pain in my body again hehehehehe
it's miracle of God...

and i am so thank full for my family (mam, dad, & my brother) and my friend's support here...
Domo Arigatou Gozaimasu Oniisan to Imoutochan desu
and thank's for being my family

new page in my life is starting now
so have a few of plan right now

Faith, hope, and love are essentials of the Christian experience. While we will never experience the "loss" that the disciples felt after Jesus died, there are times in our lives when faith and hope become weak, even though we say that we love the Lord. "And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love" (1 Cor. 13:13).

As we observe the time that Christ was in the tomb following the crucifixion, we see these three essentials weakened in the lives of those who followed Jesus. Their faith and hope were badly shaken, but we could not say that they ceased to love their Lord. It is the resurrection of Jesus Christ that cements all these three together.

An example of the weakness of faith is seen in Thomas who doubted (Jn. 20:24-29) until he could see and touch Jesus. His was a faith that demanded physical evidence. Unless he saw that evidence, he said, "I will not believe" (v. 25). Later Jesus chided him, "Be not unbelieving, but believing" (v. 27). Thomas's definition of faith and hope was here lacking the Hebrews 11 definition, "Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." He did not believe the Word proclaimed about Christ's resurrection. The other disciples also displayed this same weakness of faith (see Jn. 20:19; Lk. 24:25, 40-41).

The crucifixion also shattered the hope that the disciples had. "But we were hoping that it was He who was going to redeem Israel. Indeed, besides all this, today is the third day since these things happened" (Lk. 24:21). They used the word "redeemed," which is exactly what Jesus did on the cross, but they saw it only in a temporal sense. "If in this life only we have hope in Christ, we are of all men the most pitiable. But now Christ is risen from the dead, and has become the firstfruits of those who have fallen asleep" (1 Cor. 15:19). Any time our hope is only in the here and now, it is defective (cf. Heb. 6:18-20).

We can say that Mary Magdalene and the disciples did love the Lord. Mary was present at the trial, the crucifixion, and the resurrection of Christ. She was set free from seven demons (Lk. 8:2) and came weeping to the tomb of Jesus out of a great love for Him (Jn. 20:13). Being forgiven of much, she loved much (Lk. 7:47). She did not have the faith and hope of the resurrection (Jn. 20:15), but she still loved her Lord. But without the resurrection, even her love was incomplete. Her love would be in the past tense-she "loved" him. Her understanding of Jesus' love was also in the past tense for a time. For her, how could a dead Jesus still love her? Once she heard her Lord's voice calling her, and recognized it, she clung to Him with an intense love.

Without the resurrection of Jesus, faith, hope, and love are all in vain. Life is vain. The three days of Christ's entombment were dark and depressing for the disciples. Maybe we too go through events in our lives that lead to darkness and depression. The weakness of the flesh causes us to look on the temporal things instead of the eternal and to live by sight instead of by faith. Where do we go for light and life? It must be outside of ourselves and in the only One who has been tempted, suffered, died, and risen that we may come to the throne of grace to obtain mercy and find grace. Go to the Victor!

It is the victorious, risen Jesus which gives substance and evidence to faith, hope, and love. These must exist together in us and together with Christ. In our weaker times, remember what Jesus said, "Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed" (Jn. 20:29). These things were written down for us in the Scriptures, "that you may believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God, and that believing you may have life in His name" (Jn. 20:31). It is His Holy Spirit who was sent to guide and comfort us and assure us of His never-ending presence.

It is faith, hope, and love in the risen Christ that lifts us up to live a resurrected, thankful, and meaningful life. Nothing else can or will do this. "If then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are above, where Christ is, sitting at the right hand of God. Set your mind on things above, not on things on the earth. For you died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God" (Col. 3:1-3). Life without an ever-present eye on the risen and reigning Christ is in vain. Life without a Savior is death.

Fear not! He is risen from the dead, reigning on high, and returning for us.

Written by Paul H. Treick
http://reformedherald.org/

Life is almost never escape from the problem, that’s right! The life exam is always there, in our life. This will not give us “A” or “B” value. This is not ordinary kind of exam, but the exam for strengthen our faith with God.
Don’t be worry because anything that happening in your life had the way out. There’s always a way in God.
Past, when I was in collage, about 4 years ago, i said to my self that “I want to get work in television companies”. It’s really big dream. You know friends, all fame television companies was in capital city and could you imagine it was being hard to me because I was live in a small hometown -Malang, the flower’s city- far from capital. I tried to be a good student, tried to achieved best value.
When I was graduated, I got my first job in education newspaper as journalist, I didn’t work in television yet, it was going for 3 years. Perhaps this work is not same with my dream but I never stop to hope and believe that one day God gave me it.
I tried to learn many things -patience-. I had to wait and surrender to God. Even in the process it was going hard and i had to spent long time but finally I am in my aim now (it’s still going about 5 month) .
The point is “NEVER GIVE UP”, I didn’t give up to get job in television company (art is my way) and I got it, I never give up to be a fame novelist and I never give to more of my dream, so you are?
Never stop when “the exam” come to your life. God will not stay on His seat, HE surely help us with HIS way. That un-thought by us. With HIS glorious way HE will bring us to the Joy.


“And He said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my strength is made perfect in weakness.” 2 corinthians 12 : 9a.

someone asked me some question about boyfriend (wow it's sound like not weeddy to talking about Boyfriend ;P)

past,when i cooked(i always hungry on midnight, it's weird but i can't stop this)

ok let back to the story....
my friend and me had the "weird-secret-talking" at midnight in the kitchen and what about it? it's all about "what are you thinking about your ex. boyfriends, girl?"
me for a minutes, can't say a word..."well..." i tried to answer *take a deep-breath-sigh*
"he is good boy, handsome (definetly yes), cool, a best drummer i ever seen before, a good son coz he never forget to go to church every sunday,..." I took a deep breath and looked at my friend...
"just it that i can remember about him" i said. then, my friend looked at me with a serious eyes and she just said "ohhh...".
"you still love him?" asked her then made me shocked "ehm..what i have to say?, i never felt the same feeling since our broke" i said with the innocent face
"in past, you loved him much...i knew coz you told me it a thousand time" said my friend unbelievable
"Ok, but it's gone. i loved him in past as my boyfriend but now i love him as my friend" i tried to explain the truth.
"accepted, but how about your memories? what should you do if someday -accidentally- you meet him,
don't you feel awkward and weird? especially if you've kissed?" told her
"Wait"
"We never kiss, as long as, not yet" said me
then, my friend looked at me "Never?"
"Yes, never"
-----End----

.

I APPEAL to you therefore, brethren, and beg of you in view of [all] the mercies of God, to make a decisive dedication of your bodies [presenting all your members and faculties] as a living sacrifice, holy (devoted, consecrated) and well pleasing to God, which is your reasonable (rational, intelligent) service and spiritual worship.. Do not be conformed to this world (this age), [fashioned after and adapted to its external, superficial customs], but be transformed (changed) by the [entire] renewal of your mind [by its new ideals and its new attitude], so that you may prove [for yourselves] what is the good and acceptable and perfect will of God, even the thing which is good and acceptable and perfect [in His sight for you]..

Romans 12 :1-2.

last night, when i was checking my novel about 01.00 am. i opened a website, here is the address http://www.maqdalene.net/, there is the great Words of God made me o surprise. why i choose this page ? "The Acceptable Sacrifice" or "Persembahan yang berkenan" or "受け入れを生け贄に捧げる -- maybe is the translate in Nihongo, please correct if here is any fault with the Kanji or Nihongo...i ask my Onisan, Kyosuke to correct this hehehehehe...

"what the real mean of Acceptable Sacrifice?"

God said on bible that "where is your wealth there is your hearth".
let see the story on Mark 2: 41-44...
(41) And He sat down opposite the treasury and saw how the crowd was casting money into the treasury. Many rich [people] were throwing in large sums.
(42) And a widow who was poverty-stricken came and put in two copper mites [the smallest of coins], which together make half of a cent.
(43) And He called His disciples [to Him] and said to them, Truly and surely I tell you, this widow, [she who is] poverty-stricken, has put in more than all those contributing to the treasury.
(44) For they all threw in out of their abundance; but she, out of her deep poverty, has put in everything that she had--[even] all she had on which to live.

so, guys...what you thinking now?