AN INTRODUCTION
Tuesday, September 30, 2008 11:47:15 PM
I always thought it would take several books before this one. I gave them a way etherically as I found myself too stretched by events that were occurring on the planet. It was all I could do, so they were never lost. I gave away a lot when I found I couldn’t hold it all. After all I was a human, in a body, and incarnation. You’d be surprised what we actually do although it stretches you on every level of your being.
I was trained for the work I did my whole life, everything in it was training for our work. We succeeded and we are still here which is a miracle in itself. Much more, much more was achieved through activation, initiations and the bringing together of forces within.
The Rainbow Diaries are currently being expanded into a book or PDF document that will be available to everyone. Included in the book will be a series of meditations to assist you to align with your own energies and begin your path home.
The Rainbow Diaries are a part of a broader story which you may of already heard or a story you are yet to hear. We do hope you enjoy the story........don't forget to go back to the beginning
much love
Rainbow
The author can contacted on amcreative2@hotmail.com
Please put 'RAINBOW' in the title of the email...thanks
One learns to expect wonder,
magic, surprise, Adventure,
miracles, and abundance
by setting your intent
with awareness and the
whole of your Being.[B][/B][/ALIGN]
INTRODUCTION [/SIZE]
This was written at the beginning of the journey, however, it is apparent to me the things stated are only true now. I still had a ways to go to reach that point of coming from my true centre. Maybe I was forseeing what was to come rather than where I was then.
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I don’t know what to door what to say except thank you. Thank you to the man who abused me yesterday whilst I was doing my job. You helped me to find my voice. I am not quite sure how or why and yet there it is. I felt as if I were both flying and falling/failing. Another week where both my adult self and - my child were trying to get along in the world. This man pushed all my buttons and pushed me over the edge. I was pushed back into my vulnerability.
There is nothing wrong with that I hear you say. It’s true as I hover between feeling like Icarus with wings singed and oh so tender, sweet. How to explain that vulnerability. Take a string and pluck it till it’s taut and screeching, can be plucked, no more. Not quite, it’s almost painful, joyous almost tender to the touch…too hard to explain unless you have done the rounds yourself. A phoenix rising from the ashes and I have been told that this experience has been the easiest yet?? Oh how bitter could those others seemed.
I’ve given it a name, this experience, created a name for a syndrome of my very own although I ma sure many have experienced it too. I call it the ‘’Falling From Grace” syndrome. Those who are bi-polar may have some inkling although this is more of a vertical expression of Spirit… …... bi-polar is a horizontal dance upon the cross between fear and love. One you can feel it at the base of your skull.
I feel like I’ve only just completed my dance and I am still weary. This journey into consciousness sometimes awake and sometimes asleep has not been easy on this body as a whole, neglected by adult supervision to care for its prolonging. Although I feel fit and healthy who is to know the true consequences of its lack of a steering committee.
This week I have begun a new job and did not know how to introduce myself. Like Alice in Wonderland there have been some unusual places I have been although literally it appears I have not moved from this spot. I thought I had released the journey and its experiences returning to another place in my conscious self. It seemed as if I didn’t recognize myself beyond a stranger in a forgotten land.
I had spent many years traversing the areas of landscape within and without my physical boundaries of Self and it seemed a deep and meaningful land of shades. It appeared I was fully drenched in light and yet it seemed shallow in its recompense. I give no disrespect yet it seemed as if all the tones, the shades, hues had disappeared into a depth before my face.
It felt as if I imagined a connection to the expression of my life before I saw a map before my eyes and an arrow pointing to a spot on it. You are here now, was all I heard and everything ‘’I am’’ was referenced to all that came before.
Here I am in this moment now and none of it made any sense without the story of how I got there. This was new to me. The one who left everything, everywhere, every one in that previous experience of my existence now it appeared that I made no sense without feeling myself in that space, time. As a reaction to everything that surrounded me, my, outer space.
New, I need the inner space as nothing around me defines who I am. I am even confusing myself in my expression of it. I do not experience myself as reacting to outside forces anymore. For that is a false reality. Sometimes I have to remind myself that what I am feeling in the other person’s thoughts feelings reactions not my own to look within to feel the truth, the peace of my being. I am simply acknowledging completion of a task to ground my being within physicality.
It does not mean I do not react to an event, I can do so quite spectacularly. I also see where my thoughts, beliefs and experiences have drawn that situation toward me. To feel the vulnerability to the experience that I do is an act of Divine Surrender to the truth of that reflection no matter how painful, exquisite, beautiful it maybe.
Where to start, to explain the journey, the syndrome, my experience, my Being. Why bother at all. It has taken me a long time to find my voice as I have resisted my expression.. I even got bored with the sameness of it, the knowledge, the facts, of teaching, sharing. I have been feeling physically tired from the journeying and feel like Snow White needing to sleep for a thousand years. It seems as it will not quit now and an arrow points. “You are here now”.
Let’s call the title of my journey “Falling from Grace” or falling out of alignment out of truth. I have heard this phrase many times I realized it described my experience in this lifetime. If we are to talk in terms of polarities then its opposite would be in the image of the “Phoenix Arising from the Ashes”” which was an image given to me by an astrologer at age 23/24. This was my journey for the next twenty or twenty five years. These two symbols represent my journey through the experience of exploring my consciousness. Please remember this is my journey and it is unique as the choices that I made from love or from fear or from my connection to experiences of the whole.
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A Beginning
Both the female and male ancestors came to me this morning. Just now thinking or need I say feeling “Beau” they came in loud and clear to let me know that they are there. They felt close too, closer than normal. The crows were further back or farther away than usual. Maybe because of the male energies with me, feel foreign to them.
What a trip these past two, three days. I am going to use it as an opportunity to clear past patterns for myself and the planet as I am want to do. I was thinking about the images that have come to me although they don’t feel like many.
What a snake, so huge, opaque white, no not quite…more crystalline opalescent feels closer to truth. I decide to use the image in a painting that is in progress that document earth healing I had been involved with the local indigenous energies near here the past few years. The ancestors have been working through me to reactivate the rainbow bridge from 7 chakras to its original twelve. When I lay outside to receive healing from the Earth’s energies I can feel his presence, his space, like mine, a sacred space.
Birds, lots of birds attuning me, skinks surround me. I see an image of the cups, living water, separate cups…two…..three ……..we two are cups being filled by cups above/as below. An image of the Earth arises as a cup with two people standing within it, with light swirling round, to reach the stars-love a bond of love, too much to expect?
I also saw the galactic circle with the remaining pillars and next to me a dark energy at each spot. Have we created karma together, does it matter? Will we always have a connection as a consequence? Have we had a connection previously? Did that happen when we were connected?
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When Beau shows next we are in an area surrounded by tall trees. For a while I feel as if I am on my own. I hear a voice, I apologise for not knowing the name of the one speaking to me. It is Diganda, Queen Diganda of the nature angels. She was one of our guides for our grid group.
I had had a lot of pain in my back tooth, the energetic lines were tugging. I remember that earlier that day I had spoken my truth, at the time having the feeling that I would die when I did.. I seemed off and disconnected somehow and yet new as Beau sat with me I could feel he was trying to get me to recognize something. I had fishing lines tangled round my neck and going into the back of my throat.
Beau disappeared again going off to prepare and then I was alone in the field. All of a sudden it seemed as if hundreds of voices surrounded me and a long line making its way towards me. I felt like Gulliver in the land of the Lilliputians. I was being dressed and prepared and yet, for what. My hair was woven, braided. I asked for my nails to be painted. A dress was being sown onto my body all white, silver, and gold.
Food was laid out, drinks prepared, a net thrown over the area prepared for privacy. When Beau returned and held me I felt my energy shifting and changing as we embraced. I had an image of us being in different dimensions locking and unlocking gates and doors. This process has been so much about divine surrender to our greater wills, the pair of us, not just me.
I felt a glimmer of fear that change would mean loss. It always seemed that way although usually it was for something that was more whole, more complete. I saw my galactic self within a white/gold/silver sacred circle. I was opened up somehow on both the inner and outer planes to allow another galactic being within the creation circle.
It felt as if parts of my energy were releasing to make room. When I asked why Beau would point to my throat. I felt as if he sat within my second chakra and within the 5th chakra energy within my physical vehicle.
As we lay together I could feel pain arise from Beau and as I tuned into his energy something seemed amiss. The right side the physical seemed tight as if I were holding him bound. I could feel a rigidness in his lungs, cords into his back, the will centre and the heart. His eyes were full of pain. I decided to lie down with him putting rose oil on my hands and placed them on his eyes.
Trying to tune into what was happening and the guides working with us I could feel my 5th dimensional self moving energies. I asked the Creator to work with us and I could feel the lungs, to the back, the back of the heart, liver were the different things that I had picked up in our previous days together. I felt that is where the pain surfaced for him.
I could feel the shells of the energy bodies open and it was like surgery was being performed on Beau as the guides began to pull things our of the inner planes. I was holding the energy whilst they worked. I could feel Beau had been injured as a warrior and they were pulling spears out of his body. Wooden spears out. He had bled to death internally. It dawned on me that I was also feeling this in my lungs which felt hard, my throat, a lot of grief.
Thoughts of my son in this lifetime came to me as a young fatherless renegade warrior in another time and place. He had lost his father, only having me who became dedicated to work as a healer, disconnected through grief from family and tribe. I saw myself go to my husband’s body in spirit which was broken, dead before I could reach him. I could not fix, nor mend it or change the outcome so then spent my time tending to everyone else’s wounds that I could not heal as they were my own.
My partner had passed and I missed his strength, his companionship. I realize it is a different relationship to the one forming now, a different culture, a different feel. It seemed, as if it were a deep, abiding love not spoken of in the same way as today. I had cut myself off from experiencing love like that again. Grief within love has been an ongoing theme in many relationships for me. My son couldn’t bear to think of me as a healer in this lifetime rejecting it from fear of disconnection yet again.
Later Queen Diganda spoke to me and asked that I once again be a voice for her kingdom. She said that ’all are connected and as you have surmised it is the breaking down of culture and connection to culture that is the cause of most of these problems.
Beau and I were asked to balance the masculine and feminine energies between each other. I wondered if pushing all this energy to the surface was going to release it or increase it. “Diganda answered by saying “you need to honour the thoughts, feelings that come to you within the act of balancing these energies between you. Yes, the boundaries, feelings about your bodies, minds it will help to heal the disrespect within the energy itself. It is sacred work that you do, it means being totally honest and at one with each other which maybe confronting to you both. You need to do this together as a healing task, learning to honour the one, and the other. Move past the physical expression and into the quiet contemplation of each other it will be intense work and will take many years if you are committed to it.
It is the work of nature, there are many parts that makes up nature and humanity is an important part. Many realms choose to take part. It will be a journey of hope, love and self discovery. It is about the energy of giving and receiving of the divine masculine and feminine coming to know each other through their respective mirrors. You will have many helpers in your self discovery. The story is about my realms and creation. Do not expect it to be a straight love story. Go within and discuss your needs what is it you choose to discover about yourselves?
Here is what we came up with: Be guided by love, be love, through love, back to love.




