There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child."

Ok friends,

This morning my husband had his first day back to work after being laid off basically for the past 4 months. (off and on, but mostly off) So I got all the girls off to school as normal whilst sucking coffee down as fast as I could. (I have to make 3 separate trips while doing this.) Then the last trip was for my husband because I have pick up kids in the afternoon. Anyway....I dropped him off a little early and as he was heading off into the big a$$ company in his spiffy clothes I got a little sad. He looked like a kid on the first day of school...timid and not wanting to walk in alone. He noticed another guy who looked a lot like himself, nicely dressed and carrying a notebook. Slowly he gravitated over to the other fellow and they walked in together.

I drove around the parking lot onto the main street and headed towards the loop that would take me to the highway. Some weird feeling overcame me and I started to shed a few tears.

I AM ALONE. I am actually ALONE! Holy crapola I don't know whether I should be jumping for joy or going back to bed in a fit of depression. Feeling neither elated or overly sad, I just kept driving through the blur of tears against my gas permeable contact lens.

No one to eat lunch with.
No one to talk with.
No one to gossip with.
I wouldn't hear him snoring during the day.

It just felt so empty for a while and still the emptiness follows me now. It's 1:17 and I am listening to the laundry and looking around the house...like now what? Eh..I'll get used to it...

I'm craving a veggie soy like burger...wonder if I can find a recipe?

Talk soon!