There's nothing sadder in this world than to awake Christmas morning and not be a child."

Oh wow...yesterday evening I started to delete people from my friend list that didn't have a user pic. (with the exception of H82typ aka Dennis, he has proven his validity and is a pretty cool guy) Deleting became addicting to me because I figured out a way to do with without leaving the edit page.

Instead of left clicking on "remove" IN EDIT PAGE I right clicked and chose 'open in background tab'. I went through each page (a total of 30 pages 39 people per page) and removed everyone that
a) I didn't know.
b) didn't comment on my page.
c) left My.Opera

I kept those that
a) I know visit but infrequently
b) visit frequently
c) are no longer active but have special meaning to me

So...after deleting those 'unfriends' I headed over to my Inbox. Oh Lord...I had messages from 2006 in there...over 5,000. Because of Opera allowing a check all feature, deleting was time consuming but worth it. I took a trip down memory lane. All those messages!! Some of you should know that yes, I still had your emails. Alllll the bad and alllllll the good. Anyway, they are all gone now. I thought I needed a fresh start...and it's sort of nice!

Now I am able to keep it up and I don't regret losing all those old letters. I am at a different place in my life now and I don't miss the old me...I've changed over the past 5 years and seeing the old me in the inbox was scary.



One last thing...if I accidentally removed you, please write me and let me know.
-Sarah aka Cupcake

Was just thinking about how exciting my life is, organizing bills, shopping for healthy meals that fill them up, crocheting random things, finding the best deals when buying things for the home, cooking, tending to the cats, playing Sorority Life and now Mafia on Facebook. Golly gee, things are so fun. I don't smoke, drink, party...and my skin thanks me for it. But what about my social life? My social life consist of friends online..and I am happy with that for the most part...except I miss one thing. My real life friends. Meh. Sometimes I long for the days that I was young and single and going out at least 3 and 4 nights a week, going to work half awake and half drunk. Mmm I miss those days.

Now...I am drowning in dept and kids and family life, trying to figure out what to do next and honestly I can't be anyone but myself to others now...I can't hide what I truly am and what I do. Walking out in pajama bottoms and T-Shirt to take kids to school is who I am. I don't dress up everyday, I don't fix my hair everyday or wear make up. I just go. Just go like a normal person, duah. No longer do I feel pressured to look a certain way. There was a time in my life where I had a ton of anxieties about my appearance, but now I am comfortable and not afraid of what others think. I sing my music loud in the mini van and if the weather is nice we will let the windows down and share the joy of the Lord with whoever is unlucky enough to pass us by in a car.

Yesterday was a wonderful ride, I took the twins to pick up my oldest daughter...KLove was on the radio and we would clap and hoot and holler saying "It's a beautiful day! Be happy!" To other cars. We sure did get some weird looks...Just not sure why. Ahh I say too bad for you if you can't have joy in your heart. Feel sorry for you. Life is too short not to have joy. Shout and smile and be heard if you want to. And you know what? I am sorry....I don't care what you think of me.


Sarah