Sunday, January 20, 2013 7:59:09 AM
All I wanted was for him to own it, I needed him to own it, not to everyone else just to me. I never thought he would but he did, it's time to let it go. That's the only way I'll be able to heal. The only thing I wanted was that.
Thursday, January 17, 2013 8:01:31 AM
"I wasn't trying to forget it. I just didn't acknowledge it. It was in a box, on a shelf, in a closet that I never went into."
Friday, November 23, 2012 5:55:56 AM
It feels just like someone ripped my insides out......
Wednesday, October 31, 2012 3:30:44 PM
as long as bieber is ok i dont care.....screw the rest of u
Saturday, October 6, 2012 8:27:34 PM
I just have to trust him even if he decides that it ends today. But the thought of it is causing a pain i didnt i expect. now Im just scared.
Friday, September 7, 2012 3:03:30 AM
Bla Bla Bla Nothing I see has any relevance to my life now. The way I see it we've finally found a middle ground. Now there's only the peace of knowing I wouldn't change a thing. Now leave it.
Tuesday, August 28, 2012 4:35:15 AM
It was then the realization finally sunk in, August 27, 2012. Sitting in my room at 10:30 at night it had never been so clear. For the first time in my life the confusion was gone. How could I have wasted so many years searching for the truth and it was right in front of me the whole time? I've heard people say that everyone sometime in their life will experience a "moment of clarity". I never truly understood what they were talking about till that moment. This was my "moment of clarity"! After all those painful years I spent questioning who was real and who was not. Which one should I let go of and who was worth fighting for? The answer was so simple, I needed to let every single one of these men go. What I was convinced I also in each of them was only a delusion. Somehow I had made up my own reality only choosing to see what I wanted to believe, refusing to see them for what they truly were. You all have to get out of my life. I will be just fine without each and every one of you. The overwhelming fear I had of losing them was suddenly gone and it was time to clean house. The only choice for me was a new beginning that I could never have as long as I kept clinging to my past. It was time to just let them all go and I was okay with that. The overwhelming feeling of pain was suddenly gone and I felt a great sense of relief. For the first time in my life I only felt peace.
Thursday, July 26, 2012 4:51:34 AM
Hate that it's come to this. Never in my life have I competed on any level for the person I was with. Things were bad but I never had someone make me worry someone else might take my place. I could love someone more than life itself but I will never compete for a place in someone's heart. Seems she is willingly to do that when it comes to you, maybe you see that as dedication, to me it's very sad. No one can tell me they know you better than I do, no one. I loved you anyways, and maybe she will too. The only thing that I know with 100% certainty is that she is not me, I'm not that easy to get over and someday you will see this. I suspect it will be too late when it finally happens but I'm not going to hate you for it. When I love people I love them for life no matter how hard you make it. I would've backed you till the ends of the Earth just like I do for the people I love. But this is different. I guess I really do have limits after all. For the first time in years it seems I feel at peace with my decision.
Thursday, July 19, 2012 9:48:42 PM
Awwwwwwwwwwwwww, crap!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Friday, July 13, 2012 10:27:31 PM
It seems as I look back over the last 18 years of my life the majority of it has been pain and heartache. I've almost spent a lifetime believing that there was good in everyone if you just looked deep enough. I believed that in the end love was all you needed to make it through. My imperfections were never a secret but I always liked who I was. I always said I'd never take back any of my decisions because those struggles made me who I was today. I never regretted loving anyone in my past because each of them taught me just as much as they eventually took away. No matter what life through at me back then it never took my spirit away. But as I sit here now I just want to escape and never look back. I feel like this world is sucking all the life out of me. I don't see any good in the people around me anymore and in God I've lost my faith. The only thing I expect from the people around me is that eventually they will leave too one day. The only thing life has taught me is eventually everyone leaves. People always say it will get better but that's not true. The only way it could ever get better is for me to escape this living hell that I live every single day. I think about heaven a lot lately and the people waiting for me there. I'm not making a difference in the people's lives around me. There's no one that couldn't live without me here. No matter how much I love each one of them the outcome is always the same. What do you do when all you want is to run away but there is no where to run to?
Sunday, July 8, 2012 9:22:58 PM
All I know is very little,
All I know changes every day.
All I know will never be proven,
All I know I just simply know,
All I know is to trust my gut,
All I know is to trust my heart,
All I know I cannot reason,
All I know is my intuition,
It was right all along.
All I know is that you hurt me,
All I know is that you leave me.
All I know is I’m never enough,
All I know is you’re never wrong.
All I know is your control,
All I know is such disrespect.
All I know is the secrets you hide,
All I know is the lies that don’t stop.
All I know is the unforgiveness,
All I know is your anger,
All I know is you never made me happy,
All I know is the fear you caused.
All I know is it was never about me,
All I know is it was really about you.
All I know is deep down you hate yourself,
All I know is by tearing me apart,
Somehow it makes you fell better.
All I know is it was only misery and pain,
All I know is that‘s not how to love.
Sunday, July 8, 2012 2:09:26 PM
Actually it looks like Bieber won the game again.....
Tuesday, June 12, 2012 2:50:27 AM
i'm discouraged.......but not ready to give up on love
Sunday, April 22, 2012 4:28:13 PM
Say what you wish, I don't feel regret, I feel like I finally have the last piece to the puzzle. Take happiness in other's pain and disappointment if it helps you somehow. But in the end it won't give you peace, I promise you. I didn't survive this long to not see it through.
Sunday, April 22, 2012 12:03:42 PM
There's about to be a shift in power fellas......
Sunday, April 15, 2012 7:48:18 AM
GAME OVER, IM OUT! NO LONGER WANT IN THE SPOTLIGHT, NEVER DID! DONT NEED ANOTHER BOYFRIEND SO GUYS PLEASE JUST GO AWAY! :-)
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