So, this happened today...

On my way back, I had to share the lift with one of the big bosses.

I always tend to ignore them but since it was just the two of us in the lift, I think it is kinda rude to stare intently on my phone, trying to update how happy I was leaving work today on the blog.

So I said, 'Oh hi, how are you today?'

What followed was an awkward conversation of that I am leaving office at 2.50pm, due to the fact that I actually finishes at 2pm because I start at 5am.

Mechanical conversation. I regret that I even tried.

I completed two projects today.


Reversible hat for my colleague's kid and my cowl/pidge scarf.


I want to write something more substantial but I really should be sleeping now...

I still miss Ben. I hate that. I must not miss him because he'd been a douche. But I kept thinking how we spent our time talking, lonely souls that we were. Well, I still am.

I hate the fact that he chose her over me, when I am his best friend. Really shows what my real worth to him. And he insisted on leaving when I begged him to stay. Wow, how my dignity flew out of the window because I've missed him so much.

It is just sad thinking how I intensely miss him and he just comes by when he feels like it. Like yeah, thank you a-shole. You sure make me feel special. *sigh*

I still wonder if he misses me. I wonder if he thinks of me sometimes. Not as much as I miss him, not as much as how I think of him, but passingly, would he still feel anything about me now that we are not talking anymore.

I do want to talk to him again, but I don't trust myself and I don't think he wants to talk to me anymore. Sad fact.

Meh. Goodnight.