Posts tagged with "fatigue"
Tuesday, 1. December 2009, 13:42:26
training, life, fatigue, A
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It’s the first of December and it has finally stopped raining! Let’s hope that it stays that way. This morning the temperature was slightly below zero when I headed for work. It was cold and dark and all that, but it still felt better than a sky filled with clouds and rain, rain, rain! Instead I could see a beautiful moon. And I wasn’t half as tired as yesterday, as I had also slept rather well tonight. I really do have to do something about my bed though … and about the fact that I don’t do enough physical exercises, but spend way too much time on the couch, just cuddling with my 
sweetheart. Cuddling is very good for your soul, but I do think that most of us [need to be a bit more active than that. Last night we did not collapse on the sofa until nine, when CSI was on, as we had been doing laundry and been out hunting for a cute pink mini-pc (A. has made me really desire one of those!) and … well … I slept through most of the night, only waking slightly before the alarm went off, and my back wasn’t aching as much as it usually does …
And today the papers talk about some scientists who have concluded that exercise makes us smarter … so there is another reason for not being a couch potato! How come I still don’t feel like going to the gym? I’d much rather go home and play Super Mario Wii 
It is so much fun! I SHOULD try to go to the gym today, or at least do some training with Wii Active or something … but who knows? I am very good at not being good, after all :S But perhaps the best idea of all would be to go for a walk … as one should really enjoy the good weather while it lasts. God knows that we haven’t seen much of the sun lately!
I recently started following another blog, called “Farmorsbloggen” (≈Grandma’s blog), and apparently she posts questions twice a week … questions meant to make people contemplate their lives etc. I like the idea, even though I am not always sure that too much contemplation is good. I suppose that it depends on what kind of contemplation you get yourself into … I have a feeling that these questions are meant to induce positive thoughts, not negative ones … Anyway, the last question she posted was “What will you have achieved at this time next year?”, and she’d gotten a rather funny comment from a guy saying that he would be able to bake a certain cake without recipe 
I suppose that we all have different goals in life, huh? Personally, I suppose that I’d like to be happy. To love myself. To not think “I can’t do that” about most things. And of course I’d like to be training regularly, to be fluent in French (or at least better!), to have done some interesting travelling … And I hope that A. and I will have found some cozy place where we can live together “for real”. Not that I mind the way we live together now, but it’s less fun for him, as my apartment isn’t exactly his home. It’s kind of scary to think about moving in together, but … exciting too I don’t think it can be said enough; he makes me so happy! I suppose that there is one more thing I should try to achieve … being more tidy. I desperately wish that I could make myself put away stuff after I used it, hang clothes back into the wardrobe after I’ve worn them etc. but it seems impossible for me. Are we born with sense of order, or is it something that we acquire when we grow up, I wonder? I sometimes wonder if it isn’t controlled by some gene …a gene that I don’t have.
Thursday, 24. September 2009, 17:44:14
movies, fatigue, tv, packing
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I’m so tired! And it feels like I am coming down with a cold! That can’t be … I must find my way out of it somehow (I’ve been suggested vitamins, whiskey with honey, vodka and God knows what) ‘cause I really can’t get sick right now! And I am already so sick of the darkness that comes with this time of year … it’s pitch black when I go to work in the mornings now (I start work at 6:30 this week) and it is so depressing. Especially when it’s wet and windy like this morning. Right now I feel that all that keeps me up is the thought of vacation … Both A. and I seem to focus on that a lot right now … This morning I told him “one week from now we will wake up in Paris”, which made him smile … and he said that will be his birthday and that he wants a muffin with a candle in the morning. I wonder if I can fix that. I will do my best He did NOT want 30 candles though
This said, I asked my colleague if it would be okay for me to come in a bit later tomorrow, and she said yes. Yay! I did not feel tempted by the idea of getting up around five, then work all day and do conference stuff/party all evening. I haven’t decided yet how much time I will take off tomorrow, but my colleague said it would be okay either way. Maybe I will sleep long enough for A. to get up, so he could drive me to work? He asked me if I wanted him to do that yesterday, but did not look so tempted when I said I still meant to be at work at 7:30 … but perhaps if I go a bit later It doesn’t make that much difference at work, I think, and I really feel in need of some sleep and a good snuggle. The idea of sleeping without my sweetie for two nights now is a bit scary! Like I’ve said before – it’s uncanny how fast one can grow accustomed and addicted to something/someone.
Speaking of addictions … yesterday I watched an episode of “Buffy the vampire slayer”. I think it must have been about four months since I last watched her. I guess that addiction was just a reaction to not having any more interesting addiction (read “crush”)in my life … Can’t say I felt as into it all now, but it was still entertaining. Otherwise, yesterday was the first day of the new semester at French, and I’d say it went well … The new teacher (Martine) seems nice, the people more motivated than my last group and … I don’t think I’ll fail entirely when it comes to catching up. We were a mix of people who were new to this particular group and who’d been there for a while, so it was okay. I was not the only new one! And I like the fact that these people seemed a bit more ambitious than some of the people in my own group who after two semesters still couldn’t recall the present tense forms of être and avoir. For practice I watched a French film the other night, as I was waiting for A. to come home from his parents’ place. I wonder why all French films seem to be depressing … This was a thriller called “Le serpent” and I’d say it was rather good, but … like I said, sort of depressing. Everything just turned from bad to worse all the time. The ending did have a touch of Hollywood though. Can’t say I caught much of the spoken French though … they speak so fast and bind the words together so much that it’s almost impossible to recognize even a single word. I wonder if I will ever be able to understand spoken French *sigh*
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I've packed my bag now. At least I hope that I've packed what I need. It's so hard! And I want to bring a small bag, so it's hard to fit everything ... especially shoes. A. says he plans to travel only with cabin luggage when we go to Paris ... I don't think that I can do that. After all, one can't bring all the necessities in the make-up kit in your handbag anymore, due to the safety regulations ... I've really stressed at lot since I got home, making dinner (roast beef and a kind of potato salad - it turned out yummy!), taking a bath, trying to figure out what to pack etc. Now I just want to collapse in the sofa with my sweetheart and cuddle ... So I think that I will go for that!
Tuesday, 7. July 2009, 17:59:41
training, fatigue, A, feelings
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Life is back in its usual tracks … I am so tired I could cry. Or almost. I could have, if I had been sad. But I am not. I am actually rather happy! But I’ve slept way too little since I got back from vacation (then I, on the other hand, slept rather a lot) and it’s taking its toll on me. It’s a good thing that I only work this week and then have another week off. Perhaps then I can get a few late 
mornings Not too late, though, as that would only make me feel like I am wasting the days away. Otherwise the summer, as always, contains way too many weeks when I start working 6:30 – that IS tiring. And today I got soaked by the rain… it started with a few drops that did not seem too bad, so I only put on my rain jacket and not my rain trousers … and then the sky just opened up and drenched me, and there was no time to put more clothes on, I was already wet to the bone. But right now the weather is rather nice ... The sky is cloudy, but the sun is showing its face also.
The mess of my apartment is currently driving me nuts! It's not really worse than usual, actually even less so, but ... I still have trouble finding things that I am looking for and it is so annoying! But it's too big a project to fix it all at once, so I hope that I will be able to do it if I start little by little. I've tidied the wardrobe a bit - there is still a lot of mess, but at least one can now step halfway into it - and also the desk a little bit ... and the kitchen a bit. That is, I guess, one of my problems - I do just a little in every place, instead of doing it all the way in one place at the time. I wish I was a more neat person ... I think that would simplify life a bit. I wouldn't want to be pedantic or anything, just a little bit less messy, if you know what I mean? I wish that it did not seem impossible to me to put things back where I got them, and stuff like that.
But I am still proud of myself today. In spite of my fatigue, I did a session of training with the Wii Active when I got home, and then I made myself dinner. Definitely nothing fancy (macaroni and meatballs that certainly weren't made from scratch), but still! They say that eating is good, and I know that it is ... even though I sometimes lose my appetite, I know that I feel better if I get some food into my system ... It's hard those days when I lose appetite so completely that I can't even force down food though ... but luckily that doesn't happen too often at the moment. Anyway, I hope that I can build some kind of routine when it comes to the training, as my body definitely needs it. The last nights my back has been so stiff and sore that I've been wanting to scream whenever I shift position in bed ... that is NOT fun 
Yesterday we visited Allsång at Liseberg for the first time this summer, and it was nice. Well, the weather could have been better, but at least it did not rain all the time. And the rain did have its advantages ... like A. looking adorable when he borrowed my very pink rain jacket We - A., Sofus, JoJo, Mu and me - started out having pasta at Restaurang Söder before entering the amusement park and join the rather big bunch of people there for singing in the rain. We did feel that the whole thing had lost a bit of spirit this year, with it being broadcasted on TV and all, but it was still fun. The theme was "poodle hair and shoulder pads" and we got to sing some really nice 80's schlagers and stuff, listening to Lotta and her guests Charlotte Perelli, Sarah Dawn Finer and Agnes. And 
I was so happy to be there, with both my lovely friends and my sweetheart We walked around the park a bit before going home too ... and then it started raining heavily again as A. and I were going to his car ... and it kept raining ... but we didn't really mind that much, finally. Snuggling in a car with the rain hitting the roof is rather cosy, after all And gosh! I've said it before, and I'll say it again ... he makes me so happy that it's scary. I wish that I could put it into words. I wish that I could write him the most beautiful love poem ever ... Why, oh why, can I only write poems when I am sad? Why is it so much easier to put words to feelings of sadness, of heartache, of misery than to those of happiness, closeness and companionship? I wish I could tell him what a positive force he is in my life and just how much I adore him and how he constantly seems to put smiles on my face, even when he's not around ... Isn't that just another weird thing? How we tend to tell everyone else about how that special person makes us feel, rather than to tell him/her? It's kind of sad ... and I truly hope that I will get there, to the point where I find the courage and the words to tell him ... tell him more than the trivial things, that he's pretty and cuddly and adorable, you know?
(And I wish that I could lose those fears that still linger inside of me ... for which I also have a hard time finding words ... they are so deeply rooted somehow that they seem impossible to define *sigh*)
Monday, 25. May 2009, 20:23:32
light, fatigue, sleep, work
There are a lot of good things to be said about summertime, but I must say that the fact that it never gets dark drives me nuts! I guess that I should be glad that I don’t live further north … midnight sun would definitely drive me over the edge! It is, of course, nice that it’s not dark when I go home from work … but it’s extremely annoying that it’s still light when I should be in bed. One doesn’t get sleepy the same way as one does in wintertime … and if I am not sleepy, it doesn’t matter how tired I am, I just can’t sleep! How I envy those who can fall asleep anywhere and anytime! I have both Venetian blinds and shades in my bedroom windows, but it doesn’t help … there is still some light that finds its way in, and also, like I said, it’s hard to ever get into going to bed mood when it’s after 10pm and still rather light outside. It feels like it’s almost as light as it is during day in winter, at least if it’s not a sunny day! And even at midnight this time of year it’s not as dark as it is around 5pm in the wintertime … Isn’t that just strange? If one is free and doesn’t necessarily have to get up early next morning, sure these light evenings can be a real treat, since you can enjoy being outdoors in a different way when it’s light than when it’s all dark … but when one has to work, and has to get up around five in the morning, then it’s just murder!
I was so tired this morning that I felt sick. And then when I remembered that we were doing overtime today I almost felt like crying, ‘cause I felt so exhausted and I wanted to nourish the idea of being able to take a nap when I got home from work … Don’t ask me how I finally managed to drag myself out of bed! I’d say Ida and I spent most of the morning feeling sorry for ourselves and how tired we were! But we survived the day, and the overtime, without collapsing. I guess we still had a better start to the day than one of the drivers did … When he was going to move our company car he accidentally drove it into his own truck and pretty much broke the entire tailgate of the car! Not the best way to start a week, you’d agree!
Anyway, I really should go to bed! Perhaps if I try, I will be able to fall asleep? Perhaps there is a chance of waking up tomorrow and not feeling exhausted? But for that to work out, I think that not only does it have to become darker, but I need to shut off my brain too. It seems to have fallen into one of those periods where it just spins ‘round and ‘round, filled with way too many thoughts, worries and … yes, what, exactly? I am not sure …
Wednesday, 20. May 2009, 20:18:58
conversation, fatigue, tv, work
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Obviously I was way too effective on Monday, ‘cause after that I had not energy left. That could, of course, have been due to lack of sleep. On Monday evening I got caught in another sudoku (one really shouldn’t do them in bed!) and yesterday I started watching the BBC series “War & Peace” at nine, thinking that it would be an episode of an hour and I would be able to go to bed at a decent hour … I was wrong. The episode was nearly two hours long and I didn’t get to bed until after eleven … BAD! When the alarm goes off around five in the morning, it’s not ideal to fall asleep that late. I napped yesterday when I got home, and then that evening was a total waste … I did spend 30 minutes with the Wii fit, but that’s all … I almost fell asleep after work today too, as I relaxed a bit with a book on the couch. My eyelids kept falling down so I had to get up, as I did not have time to sleep then … but I’ve slept when I returned home later. So bad! That meant that I did not make dinner, and that will just make me more tired, right? I’ve said it before and I’ll probably say it again - I am so sick of being tired!!
In spite of it being a half day at work it went surprisingly smooth. No trouble with the printers or the computer system … actually no real trouble at all. Yay to that! It wasn’t even as busy and stressful as Monday and Tuesday, we could work at a more normal pace For a while yesterday I seriously thought that Katta was going to explode from the stress … so I suppose that it was a good thing that she had today off! The holidays really line up this time of year … one would think that they could have spread them a bit better over the year! There is still the National holiday (6th of June - which is on Saturday this year, but produces a half-day at least) and Midsummer (June 26th)… but then all we get between there and Christmas is one half-day in November.
Considering I was tired enough to fall asleep then and there, I guess that it was really lucky that I had plans to meet A. for a coffee in town, or I would have slept the whole afternoon away … We had a great deal of luck with the weather too, considering that it was raining this morning and it started raining again as we left the café (Nöller in Haga), but we were able to sit outside while drinking our coffee/tea and chatting time away We discussed all sorts of things, ranging from silly ideas for public games, to cars, to child raising and the sick ideals of our society. You know, the kind of conversation when you suddenly stop and think “how on Earth did we end up here?” In short, it was nice! Then A. went on to do something work-related (he claims he’s not a workaholic but I am not so sure about that) and I … went home and napped :S
It would probably have been a good idea for me to go to bed now, in order not to sleep all of tomorrow’s day off away … but I doubt I’d be able to fall asleep anyway … so what could I possibly do that makes sense when I am this tired?! And yeah, by the way ... if anyone wonders what I did after my nap, the answer is that I watched two episodes of "Planet Earth". I just love nature movies, especially when they're narrated by David Attenborough! And even more so when I get to see adorable polar bears and penguins! Such cool animals!
Tuesday, 28. April 2009, 17:51:15
training, fatigue, feelings, sleep
Do you use the word “hate” much? I don’t, but some people truly use it excessively, and I wonder if they realize just how strong that word really is. Yesterday, my workmates were discussing the latest episode of “Expedition Robinson” (the Swedish version of “Survivor”) and one of my colleagues was very aggressive about one of the participants, saying that she hates him. And she said it with passion too. How can you hate someone that you’ve never met? Who’ve done nothing to you, or nothing truly evil in general, but who’ve only acted in a way that you find annoying on a TV-show? I don’t get it. I mean, sure, say then “that guy gives me the creeps” or whatever … but hate? I may have used that word a time or two in my early adolescent years, when emotions tend to be too strong in many ways, but never since … and I don’t think that I’ve ever really hated anybody … As I think that I’ve stated here before, hatred is a feeling that I seem to save for myself and my worst moments of self-loathing. That is sad in itself, of course … but I can’t help but to find it depressing that people so easily throw this word around about other people. (This said, I wasn’t really surprised to hear this statement from said workmate … As things have been lately I would’ve been more surprised if she had said she liked someone or something *sigh*)
I woke up from a really depressing dream this morning, and started the day in not the best mood. Now, I don’t know what my mood is. I think that I am too tired to have one. I wish that I slept better. I think that at this point my fatigue isn’t so much due to lack of sleep (even though I could probably sleep more) but rather to the low quality of the sleep that I get. I did, however, nap on the couch when I got home from work … it felt good at the point when I just closed my eyes and slipped away … but it felt less good when I woke up. When I nap n the afternoon I just end up feeling like a zombie for the rest of the evening.
I am in a reading frenzy right now, and you’re very likely to find me with a book in my hand these days. I haven’t even spent anywhere near as much time online as I usually do! Amazing! I try to use the wii fit every day too, even though I might not always live up to that. And some days I am more motivated than others. Yesterday I did a rather hard workout, with mostly aerobic and muscle exercises, whereas today I did mostly yoga and balance. After a nap, even that is impressive I really should kick my ass and go outdoors for walks instead, though, or perhaps even try some jogging. I bought new running shoes again. It’s hard to find a pair that really feel good … I hope I got the right ones this time. But I don’t think I will get in running shape for Vårruset now, as it is next week!
Ah well, I should do the dishes before “NCIS” starts …
Monday, 30. March 2009, 18:47:23
nails, fatigue, baking, french
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I think that the Chi-san thing might have worked. It’s not like I’ve been bouncing with energy all day, but I do feel less exhausted. It might be an illusion, of course. Or something not related to my little sip of “medicine” at all … but it still feels good. I’m tired, but not as tired as I usually am. And I had the energy to actually do some stuff when I got home instead of just lying down on my sofa or my bed, as I was considering doing, as my head has been hurting all day. Then again, when one actually does something immediately upon arriving home instead of sitting or lying down for a while to rest, one usually finds more energy.
So, today I started with baking polka-chocolate muffins (which I’ve been planning on doing ever since Robin and Kribbe talked about them last week), and while I was at it I figured that it was better I made some dinner to put the oven to use when it was already warm, so while the muffins were baking I put together a pasta gratin … and while the gratin was cooking, I did the dishes. Very efficient. Then I watched an episode of “Buffy the vampire slayer” while eating. After that I haven’t been overly efficient, though. I got started studying French, but grew tired of it. The text book is boring, and the article I was reading about the killings of cops in Northern Ireland annoyed me. I don’t have that much trouble understanding the words, or even the story most of the time, but there are always some expressions that I just can’t figure out 
Expressions (and prepositions) are hard in all languages, I know … especially since they aren’t always included in dictionaries.
So now I am by the computer again … and painting my nails bright yellow The latter you can blame JoJo for. She’s the one who thought I would have use for a yellow nail polish! I wonder, however, how people manage to paint their nails so perfectly … I always mess up at least one nail. Not that I have pretty nails to begin with, I am afraid. They are very brittle, and break easily, and I have a tendency to bite them … and they are weirdly shaped *sigh* Ah well, I guess that the fact that I am writing about my nails just shows that I don’t really have much to write today …
I found it rather depressing that it was dark this morning when I biked to work. I really don’t see the point of this so called daylight saving. Biking home was no fun either, but that was due to the wind. Biking against the wind really is no fun at all. Especially when one is as unfit as I am at the moment
And it is really scary how easy it is to waste time in front of the computer …
Recipe for the polka choco muffins, if anyone is interested:
100 g butter
2 eggs
2,5 dl sugar
1,5 teaspoon "vanilla sugar" (or any kind of vanilla extract, I guess)
1 ml salt
4 tablespoons cacao powder
2 dl wheat flour
0,5 teaspoon baking powder
smashed peppermint log candies, as many as you like
*melt the butter
* mix all the ingredients
* add the smashed candy to the dough
* put into muffin molds
* bake in the middle of the oven, circa 10 minutes, 200 degrees Celsius
Sunday, 29. March 2009, 19:19:07
letters, fatigue, time, french
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It seems like I am behind with everything at the moment. I’m definitely behind with my book-blog, and most certainly behind with my cleaning --- I’m behind with my dream-blog too. No one would notice that, though, as it’s a personal thing that I decided I’d try to keep a few months back (the first dream I wrote down in it was about I., if I remember correctly). I have some dreams scribbled down on a note pad beside my bed - it’s not like I remember a dream every night - but so far that’s as far as they got. I definitely intend to do a whole lot more than I actually do, eh? I am, however, proud to announce that I am no longer behind with my letters! I wrote to Renate on Friday and now I am all out of mail to reply. Let’s not mention the fact that both Mély’s and Renie´s letters would have been better off being replied in January or so. I don’t know why I struggle so much to do even the stuff that I like doing - like writing letters, cross-stitching etc. - and not only to do the boring chores, which is more natural. There really doesn’t seem to be any energy within me for anything …
I bought something at the pharmacy yesterday that is supposed to help against fatigue. I can’t say that I truly believe that it will, but I feel like I’ve reached the point where I must catch at a straw, 'cause I just can’t stand being tired all the time. I haven’t tried it yet, though. I believe I might be a bit afraid to try, as I don’t want to find out that it doesn’t work. I suppose that it will be a good day to try tomorrow though, as it’s the first morning of the DST that I have to get up early. This morning Sofus and I got out of bed when we woke up from it being light outside and even though that meant nine o’clock by the new time, it was still not exceptionally early by winter time either … When my alarm goes off at five tomorrow, I am sure that I will feel the difference more. Which reminds me that I’d better change the time on my alarm clock right away, so that I don’t forget …
I got some paint today and have now tried to enamel my chest of drawers … I’ve just put one layer of paint onto it so far, and it’s supposed to require three, and I sincerely hope that it will look better once I’m done. As it is now, it’s way too visible where I’ve crossed strokes, or put too much paint, or whatever. I am definitely not a pro when it comes to these things … And it always takes much longer than one imagines. I actually have just painted the body of it and not the actual drawers, but that’ll have to wait until tomorrow. Or perhaps I will wait and see what the result will be and hope that I find some great strategy to make it look perfect. I should also book an appointment with the laundry room for this week, as that is long overdue. Would be great if I finished sorting out the clean clothes from last month’s laundry session too :S Yes, I definitely DO suck at household chores!
Hihi, I bought a really cool book at Bokia yesterday. A visual French dictionary! It has pictures of different things with the words for it written in French and with a Swedish/Danish/Norwegian translation. I think it’s really beautiful! And I believe that such a book can be really helpful when trying to learn new glossaries. Visual help is never wrong. I do believe that I saw an even cooler (and more expensive) version of this sort of dictionary in another bookstore a while back, but this one will do for now I also ordered some books from Adlibris the other day, including the next French course book (including the answer book, but don’t tell that to David!) and a random novel in French. If I keep up with my own intentions, I should be able to learn a great deal of French, no? It’s just too bad that we’re not moving much forward in class *sigh* The lessons are a lot of fun, but that’s mainly because the people there are cool … but we don’t get anywhere. I am sure we learn a little every time, but the pace is so slow that it’s agonizing. I am sure that even those who have a bit of a problem catching everything must suffer from this. Sometimes it’s better to just move on to something else, and the things that made no sense before can suddenly make sense because you learn something else. Know what I mean? I think we’ve done two or three chapters so far this semester, last semester we did one chapter a week, and no one was complaining about that … I know for a fact that the other girl left from my old class also thinks that this is ridiculous. Every week we hope that we’ll get the next text as homework, but no … This time he asked us to re-read the last three chapters *frustrated* But since pronunciation is the thing that I have most trouble with, and for which I need a teacher the most, I guess that it still gives me something, and I’ll just try to study other things on my own. I do read articles from the French news sites every now and then. After all I am rather used to reading stuff with the help of my dictionary, after the endless hours I spent doing just that back in Italian class at university …
[picture from Globeförlaget]
Wednesday, 25. February 2009, 18:53:43
boys, fatigue, feelings, computers
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So, the major news around here now seem to be that princess Victoria and her Daniel are now engaged and will get married next summer. I don’t know, it doesn’t feel that huge ]
to me. It’s not like it’s unexpected, they’ve been a couple since forever, it seems, and I guess that “it’s about time”, considering how things are supposed to be in the royal circles. I imagine that it would be totally inappropriate for them to have kids without being married, or something like that. I guess that this whole business means that there will be endless discussions in the media between royalists and people who want to abolish the royal family. I must admit to not having any real opinion on the matter … I guess that in time the king will disappear. Whether or not it will happen in my lifetime, that’s another matter. I’d wager it probably depends on the kings and queens to follow. If a really bad one comes along, I’d guess that we’d abolish them, but as long as they are pretty and sociable and being a good public face for Sweden, they’ll remain. Anyway, I suppose that there will be a lot of fuss about this wedding, even though experts claim it won’t be as big an event as it would’ve been in Victoria was actually the queen already, and not just the crown princess. Personally I am just glad that my life is not in the media spotlight the way hers has always been, and most likely will always be …
I’ve been awfully tired and sleepy all day. I hardly got out of bed at all this morning, and it’s been bad ever since. I mean, I am complaining about being tired most days, but some are still worse than others, and this day is among the worst I’ve had in a long time. It was so bad that I even had coffee after breakfast. That made me all speeded for maybe half an hour, and then I felt just as drained again. I think that I might have caught another cold, and that it’s somehow the main reason for my fatigue, but I don’t know. I don’t want to have another cold! I am so sick of that! I don’t think that I dare go training today, but that decision makes me feel lazy. Like I am avoiding training, even though I need it. I don’t know. The truth is that I really just feel like going home to sleep, or perhaps to watch Buffy all night I guess that I should try to eat something proper for dinner as well, but I have no idea what that should be, frankly. I don’t feel like cooking …
And I am again stuck with the image of Mr. Quiet in my head. It’s so much healthier for me not to see him. It’s weird just how much he affects me when I do. And he even said “hello” to me yesterday (Yeah, I know, it’s pathetic that I find that interesting enough to put it into writing; one could really think I was thirteen or something …) Whenever I let my thoughts wander I seem to end up fantasizing about having his strong arms around me. That is not good, of course! But then again, when are feelings ever logical? G told me that it was obvious what I was thinking about; “something with no hair and a big baby face”. Hm. Someone clearly doesn’t have an eye for beauty
***
To prove just how tired I was today, I fell asleep while watching ”Buffy”. That’s a first. I’m usually rather caught up in what’s going on in the show, but today I just dozed off while Giles and Buffy’s mom, and even principle Snyder were acting all weird due to some chocolate bars. I really think that I should call it a night early tonight and try to actually fall asleep at a decent hour. No more TV. I got to bed way too late yesterday due to watching ”Navy CIS” and ”The mentalist”. The latter is supposed to be very praised, but so far (there’s been two episodes on Swedish TV so far) it doesn’t really impress me much. It is very nice to see new episodes of ”NCIS” again though
I am currently at odds with my computer, as I wanted it to play the mp3-book that I bought with Aftonbladet this weekend, and it refused. It acted like it was about to play it, but yet it did not. I sent a file to my computer wizard Gav and it worked for him, so it doesn’t seem to be the files themselves, but something in the connection between them and my computer *sigh* I have no patience for such problems … when things that are supposed to work just don’t. The book was the over-famous (at least here) ”Män som hatar kvinnor” (The girl with the dragon tattoo) by Stieg Larsson. Everyone seem to have read his books, so up until now I’ve been avoiding it … but it’s hard not to be curious, of course.
Speaking of being at odds, I read something rather stupid in the paper yesterday. Apparently Starbucks is suing a little café in Göteborg, because they think that their name (Starcups) and logo are too similar to their own. The café has gotten their name cleared by Swedish authorities, but if I understood it correctly that doesn’t necessarily help. I seriously doubt that the people going to this café do so because they think they have anything to do with Starbucks (they don’t even have any coffee shops in Sweden!). I can’t help but to think that it seems a bit petty of Starbucks to sue a small café in little Sweden, but that’s just me. If anything, I bet this whole thing gives a lot of free advertising for a small Swedish café that would otherwise be rather unknown. Personally, I prefer a small, common café to one belonging to a big chain of things anyway. (The Local has a small article about it in English, if anyone is interested.)
Now, if you excuse me, I think I’ll actually try to drag myself to bed, cuddle up and daydream a bit about Mr. Quiet. It might not be a wise thing to do (the daydreaming part), but it’s what I feel like for now … please let me indulge in madness, just for a while
[the picture is googled]
WIDGETIZE