Black Forest Dolphin

beeing in Florida on vacation, I found out, that literately every american is permanently using a cellphone. Back home again, I checked out my own cellphone and decided, that I need a new one. One of those super-dooper things, with colour screen, built in camera and mp3 player. Otherwise I just wanted to use it as a phone. (you type in a number and then you can talk to your friends.)
So I went out to one of those really big electronic markets and went directly into the cellphone department.
The salesperson did not look very happy, when I told him that I need a new cell phone.
salesrep: do you mean, that you already have a phonecontract?
me: yes
salesrep: ok. you may take any phone you want.
me: but I need some technical advice.
salesrep: only if you agree to a new contract. They are cheaper anyways.
me. ok then ( his countenance became a little more friendly)
salesrep: you want permanent or prepaid?
me: prepaid please
salesrep: ( his face dropped back to bored)what kind of phone
me: one of those, where you can talk to people
salesrep: (looking to the ceiling with his eyebrows up) Do you want a standard or a PDA
me: yes
salesrep: so what?
me: PDA sounds good.
salesrep: (becomming a little more friedly again) Do you need GSM standard with UMTS ?
me: I want to call my friends
salesrep: do you want to send pictures
me: can I do that?
salesrep: with UMTS you can. But you better go for UMTS with HSDPA.
me: may be I do not want to send pictures
salesrep: How do you connect to your laptop? By WLAN or by Rootkit ind the BMGS standard Connectivity?
me: which laptop?
salesrep: (to another client: I`ll be with you in a second, sir) Back to me: So you do not want to transfer data to your laptop?
me: I want to call friends.
salesrep: So you do not want a WLAN model?
me: No ???
salesrep: ok. then you should at least take a HDMI model with integrated BMGS and a fast TD-SCDMA connector.
me: what is it?

As the salesman did not talk to me any longer, I decided not to buy a new cellphone and keep using my old one for some more time. But as I was ready to spend some money, I decided to buy a new televisionset. When I entered the TV section of the shop I was welcomed by a nice salesman with a bright simle on his face.
salesrep: You need a new tv?
me: not really. My old one is working well. But i'm interested in one with the flat screen.
salesrep: that is a smart idea. what type of tv are you looking for?
me: to watch television and probably the news on a wide screen.
salesrep: do you also want to play DVDs on your new set?
me: do I have to?
salesrep: in this case you should go for a VDSL model with a tripple Play HDCP.
me: can I also watch football with that?
salesrep: then you definitely need a HDTV set.
me: do you have a brochure of it?

This was the moment, when the salesman left me alone. I waited a minute or two and then decided, that my old tv-set works quite well. But I still was in the mood to spend money. Didn't the telephone-guy ask me, if I had a laptop? What a great idea - I was on the way to the computerdepartment.

Thank God: no salesman to be seen.
They offered three reasonable priced laptops with a full description of all the features:
model #1: with LAN, WLAN, USB, TCPIP, in a Core Duo version and bluetooth
model #2: with RSSreader, PCMCI-adapter, VOIP-ready and S/P-DIF configured and bluetooth
model #3: with TOS-link, Firewire, RAY-connector, several items of model 1 and/or 2 and bluetooth.

As I wanted to stick to the colour of my teeth, I decided not to buy a laptop.
On my way home I came along an office supply shop.
Here I finally could spend some money. I bought a pencil ! but not a standard one: it is painted in a reflecting blue colour, has a hightech rubber tip, a ergonomical moulded grip and a smooth writing, long lasting, ergonomical lead.
And, believe it or not: I can talk to it, because it has a name:
it's called. "black warrior"