Embrace

"I'm sorry, but no elephants on this flight.” The young ticket attendant was not amused. Already her black, blue-highlighted and straight hair and tight-fitting blouse made her look like she was attending high school instead of coming fresh out of college.

Bruce, a slightly overweight middle-aged man who wore baggy pastel-colored sweaters and khaki pants, jutted his neck and widened his eyes. “Um...why?”

Peeved, the ticket attendant turned away from Bruce. “Security!”

As if the security guard knew what she was going to ask, he threw up his hands and grimaced. The ticket attendant turned back to Bruce. “You've got to be kidding me,” she growled.

“What? Kidding you about what?” Bruce said, petting Alfred's trunk; Alfred bobbed his head up and down affectionately.

Her voice grew high. “You can't bring that thing on the flight!” she scolded.

“Why not?”

“Well—it's—you just—can't,” she finally said.

“No room?” Bruce predicted.

“For starters.”

“What do you mean, for starters?”

“Well, first of all...he needs to be in the luggage in a pet carrier.”

Bruce leaned in and noted her name tag. “Olivia, if you can find a pet carrier large enough to fit an elephant, then please...tell me so we can be on our way.”

“You're just on the wrong flight,” she told him matter-of-factly. “Why would Comfort Airlines possibly—Oh, what am I even saying...how did you get him in here?”

Bruce thought back to the conversation with his friend, who worked in delivery and was always greedy for money. Yeah, better not tell her. “So, wait, you're telling me that you are prejudiced against elephants.”

“I'm telling you that I'm prejudiced against anything that takes up more than one seat on an airline.”

Bruce looked back to a morbidly obese man reading a magazine.

“You know what I mean,” she said. “The answer is no.”

Bruce leaned in farther. “He's a good elephant. I promise. I've trained him well. Just—just last week he helped me repair my roof.”

Olivia's mouth hung open in disbelief...disbelief at his stupidity, no doubt. “Uh-huh.”

“He's potty trained. He can hold it during the flight. Olivia, I promise, he's a good elephant.”

“Are you we done?”

“Just—call your manager. Ask him what he thinks.”

Olivia rolled her eyes. “Just take a seat.” As Bruce led Alfred to the row of seats, Olivia picked up the desk phone.

Alfred, as trained, sat on the row of seats. The seats groaned and eventually cracked, sending the passengers on the opposing end airborne. Alfred, in true elephant form, didn't even pay attention to anyone, including the crying child.

Bruce looked over at Olivia. She was swinging back and forth, holding the phone close to her shoulder. She said something into the phone that Bruce could only guess. Probably something like, “Hey, there's an idiot here who wants to bring an elephant on the plane.” After a second or two, she yanked the phone away from her ear in surprise.

Bruce rocketed to his feet. Alfred did, too, causing the seats to rock the other way. “Alfred, stay put.” Back down; passengers were airborne again. “What did he say?”

The once-perky ticket manager now looked like she just came in from the rain. “I don't know...he's just laughed so far. This might take a while. Sir, if you could just take a seat.” She impatiently pointed to the seating area again. Bruce sat back down and continued to observe the woman. She swayed some more. However, something in the commons caught her attention and her cadence slowed. She had the look that one only sees in movies: that unbelieving, white-lipped expression that a character gives when a zombie is about to attack. Her hand limped and the phone fell. “Seriously?” she whined.

Bruce looked out into the common area to see a giraffe prancing through the crowd, led by an owner he knew. “Jeremy,” Bruce growled.

“Se-cur-i-tee-ee!” Olivia groaned, pounding her foot. The security officer again showed indifference.

Jeremy held his arms open and grinned a naïve and genuinely surprised smile. The smile pronounced his double chin, which curled his five o'clock shadow inward. “Bruce, what are you doing here, man!”

Bruce jabbed his thumb in Alfred's direction and tried his best to intimate his purposeful rejection.

“Aw, looks like Nina will have a playmate,” Jeremy said. He scratched the giraffe's front left leg, grabbed a treat from his overalls to give to Nina, tipped his cowboy hat and grabbed his overall straps in a prized manor.

“Uh, yeah,” Bruce said.

“My life is going great. I work with the zoo, benefitin' humanity. What do you do? You still doing, uh...”

“The circus,” Bruce said.

“Oh. Right.” Awkward pause.

Bruce looked back at Olivia, who was in the process of denting her head with the counter and contemplating where she went wrong in her career choice by chanting, “Oh, God, why? Oh, God, why?”

“Where you heading?” Jeremy continued.

“Seattle.”

Again, genuine, naïve surprise. “Whadaya know? Me, too.”

“Would you two just shut up!” Olivia said, leaning over the counter. Her breathing was visible.

“Any answer?” Bruce asked.

“No, okay! The answer is no! What do I have to do to get you two idiots to understand that! Why do you think they can get on this flight anyway?” Her hurried interrogation turned to a soft, controlled threat. “I swear, if you don't...”

A bell sounded throughout the airport to signal the P.A. system. Jeremy whirled around every which way like the aliens had landed. Olivia collapsed on the counter again and groaned. “Attention, passengers. Schedule a flight on any Comfort Air flight today and save fifty percent on your next purchase. That's right, fifty percent. Come down to the ticket counter for details. That's Comfort Air. Our seats are so large, you could fit an elephant...or a giraffe.”

Jeremy and Bruce looked at each other like they'd won the lottery while Olivia was on the verge of a mental breakdown. “You have got to be kidding me.”

An hour later Olivia was less stressed, Jeremy and Bruce were happy, and Comfort Air became the first airline to ever seat an elephant or giraffe in passenger seating.