On Being a Gentleman
Thursday, 21. February 2008, 04:05:49
Given that the only 'court' we are likely to see is traffic court, I agree with the fundamental idea that I should be a gentleman. "I disagree with this idea: A gentleman deems every other better than himself." In this day and age, the spectrum of society is far different than that of the 1800's or earlier. I think a gentleman recognizes that many people in society can not relate to the idea of courtesy, honor, or even respect and that it is not reasonable for him to condone their behavior nor their values. He certainly does not see them as being above himself. This does not mean that he treats them with disrespect. Only that he understands that they will not treat him with respect, no matter what he does.
In another regard, a gentleman is often regarded as the ideal Christian, "turning the other cheek" as it were. This brings to mind two rules of life: The golden and silver rules, which are often at odds with each other: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you, and Do unto others as they would have you do unto them. The second is mirrored by the 'when in Rome, do as the Romans do' advice. A gentleman can can do both.
When with people of the same culture, he treats people as he himself would prefer. When in another culture, he acts - as much as fits his own ideals - as that other culture expects. When you act as you expect in another culture you find that they don't like your behavior, and label you with such as 'the ugly American.'
A gentleman is never arrogant.
This post started with wickedlizard at On Being a Gentleman.
In another regard, a gentleman is often regarded as the ideal Christian, "turning the other cheek" as it were. This brings to mind two rules of life: The golden and silver rules, which are often at odds with each other: Do unto others as you would have them do unto you, and Do unto others as they would have you do unto them. The second is mirrored by the 'when in Rome, do as the Romans do' advice. A gentleman can can do both.
When with people of the same culture, he treats people as he himself would prefer. When in another culture, he acts - as much as fits his own ideals - as that other culture expects. When you act as you expect in another culture you find that they don't like your behavior, and label you with such as 'the ugly American.'
A gentleman is never arrogant.
This post started with wickedlizard at On Being a Gentleman.
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Let me set that aside (by which I do not mean let me forget or deny the absolute fact, in that context). In the sense that I mean, when I suggest 'A gentleman is one who accepts the simplified proposition that "we are united through our evolution, our origin".' a gentleman is one who believes we are all related to each other in a common cause, that of survival and an aspiration to obtain at the very least a basic and decent standard of living and at the very most to improve our situation as best we can for as long as possible without deliberately harming or exploiting our fellow human beings or our natural enviornment in the process. Such are the traps of words, of semantics, that one is obliged to make clear that the word "exploiting" has both positive and negative connotation, viz,
make full use of and derive benefit from (a resource)
• use (a situation or person) in an unfair or selfish way
• benefit unfairly from the work of (someone)
A gentleman behaves in a courteous manner and is sincere in his attitude.
A gentleman is kind and is generous to those who merit generosity.
In summary: A gentleman attempts to live by a code of behaviour that enriches the lives of those whom he comes into contact with.
Sincerely,
lokutus
By lokutus_prime, # 23. February 2008, 16:51:36
Thanks for stopping by. Thanks for the comment.
By chinajon, # 24. February 2008, 15:36:26
By lokutus_prime, # 24. February 2008, 16:48:47
By wickedlizard, # 8. March 2008, 12:05:26
By NARUTO9TF, # 21. March 2008, 15:47:45
I think you are joking. A gentleman shows respect to other men and expects it in return. Do you not do this? Of course a man acts in appropriate ways depending on the circumstances and company.
If you know how to behave around the ladies, it is probable that you also know how to behave around men.
By chinajon, # 21. March 2008, 15:56:38
By NARUTO9TF, # 21. March 2008, 16:07:56