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The Rock ... It's Cold!

Tuesday, 27. October 2009, 07:16:23

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Oh, my fucking God! That's right, folks! The ultimate in sub-zero dining exists ... in your lifetime! Enjoy the feeling of your genitals shrivelling in anticipation as you enter ... Cold Rock Ice Creamery!



Jeepers!

Cold Rock Ice Creamery! Where master creamers take one flavour of ice cream ... then (presumably taking their very lives in their chilled, bony hands) take another flavour of ice cream ...

... and smush the two of them together on a fucking cold rock!

Jesus Christ, I have to sit down! The sheer fucking excitement of it all!



Yowza!

Paint scrapers in hand, these gimmick-free, frozen cone, cocks-of-the-walk actually smush ice cream together! Right! The fuck! In front of you!



Fuck me sideways!

Surely people must spontaneously add their own cream just because of how fucking exciting this idea is! And surely such an incredible business concept could only have come from the fevered mind of someone with a fucking ice cream headache!

Cold Rock Ice Creamery! Where the gimmick is the selling point!



Warning: Sitting on an ice cream cone may cause unexpected outcomes.



Seriously, it's an ice cream place. I'm sure they have nice flavours of ice cream, which is all that really matters. But the selling point seems to be only that they smush the ice cream together. That's it. Not, "Hey, we've got all these awesome flavours". Just, "Quick, mix banana, chocolate and sarsaparilla!".

Weird ...

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Comments

theoddbod 27. October 2009, 07:53

Maybe the selling point is appealing to people's hidden sadism as they watch a poor defenceless rock abused to make their ice cream treat awww:left:

Kimmie 27. October 2009, 08:01

:insane: I take it their moronic sales pitch bugs you a little? p:

r♡se 27. October 2009, 08:47

I want ice cream! awww

David Scott Aubrey 27. October 2009, 09:22

My cold, cold rage about this gimmick has been building for years ('cause, y'know ... the business has been around for years). I finally snapped when I walked past a Cold Rock Ice Creamery at Riverlink the other week. Oh, the rage ... :lol:

Santa Furie 27. October 2009, 10:38

Actually that's a really good idea and a unique selling point too. :eyes:.
*imagines the possibilities*
It's beautiful! :yes:

Darko 27. October 2009, 11:56

I don't like ice cream THAT much :left:

Angeliki 27. October 2009, 12:08

I will have one of each! :lol:

David Scott Aubrey 27. October 2009, 12:46

One Apricot Seed, Licorice Flower and Bacon Rind Ice Cream, coming right up!

(They call that one The Furie Special). :wink:

Santa Furie 27. October 2009, 12:53

You forgot my flake. :mad:

Karen 27. October 2009, 14:45

We have Cold Stone Creamery here...not only do they do tricks with the ice cream on a slab o' rock, but they are also forced to sing while they do it! :lol:

David Scott Aubrey 27. October 2009, 19:44

Mik,

You are a flake ... :whistle: :wink:



Karen,

As if they weren't degraded enough ... :lol:

Kitty 28. October 2009, 06:15

What a weird concept. :left:

But having had a look on their list of flavours, I must admit there was a couple of pretty deliciously sounding ones!

*Imagines Caramel Mudcake, White Cookies & Cream and English Toffee* :yum: :drools:

What I don't want to imagine is what a Sticky Date might be... :left:

David Scott Aubrey 28. October 2009, 08:06

:lol:

Think along the lines of this.

Diabolical 28. October 2009, 12:06

I'm so glad I avoid ice-cream where possible :insane:

Kitty 28. October 2009, 15:18

So, there's something edible called dates - but what is it? I tried to Google it, and this is what came up: :insane:

Santa Furie 28. October 2009, 21:10

Dates are kind of like figs. I'll see if I can find an image.

Santa Furie 28. October 2009, 21:13

Darko 28. October 2009, 21:19

These are dried ones. Once, I have tasted them filled and covered with chocolate, they were magnificent :chef:

David Scott Aubrey 28. October 2009, 22:15

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Phoenix_dactylifera

Had some friends who had a date palm out the front of their house. The dates would fall off ... and ferment. They had a dog who liked eating them (who is probably currently in rehab ... :whistle: )

Santa Furie 28. October 2009, 23:31

We have them in syrup here. Could only find a picture of dried ones or the trees though. I really fancy some now.

Santa Furie 28. October 2009, 23:32

Hey David, you're a couple of visits short of taking over the community blog. Get posting that man. :up:

David Scott Aubrey 29. October 2009, 00:13

I am? Do you mean the most read blog lists? Last time I checked I was 87th ( *ahem* most popular blog on Opera).

Kitty 29. October 2009, 10:22

Those dates don't look like something I'd eat without someone recommending them. :left:

My blog will never be that popular. awww

David Scott Aubrey 29. October 2009, 10:36

It's popular amongst your readers, the people who count! :smile:

Kitty 29. October 2009, 10:39

Ain't that the truth! :happy:

Santa Furie 29. October 2009, 11:24

*chin scratch*
You're more wide-ranged popular than me kitten. I have a fanatic reader that visits me every day just to see you. :up:

Kitty 29. October 2009, 21:00

That'll be Kimmie, right? :wink:

Miss Kimbers 1. November 2009, 09:49

I've never eaten icecream there, but I've had a fruit juice thing made from smashed up fruit in a blender. I can make the same thing at home for a lot cheaper. The icecreams are so expensive, as are most icecream shops here in Aus.

As for the mixing idea, I did that when I was 5! Vanilla icecream + milo + cornflakes/ricebubbles :smile:

David Scott Aubrey 1. November 2009, 12:24

:lol:

Typically when I have ice cream, if it's vanilla, it's got to have Milo over it. I never thought outside the box to include cereal, though! :chef:

Santa Furie 1. November 2009, 17:00

I've been playing too many games...

David Scott Aubrey 1. November 2009, 20:19

:lol: And as soon as the game is 100% complete, Mik is going to grind it up and put it on his ice cream. :wink:

Santa Furie 2. November 2009, 10:24

Nah, wont be buying that. A virtual little boy to play with is way too creepy for my liking. :insane:

David Scott Aubrey 2. November 2009, 13:22

Hmm ... you might enjoy this article ... :devil:

Santa Furie 2. November 2009, 14:54

Can't see it. :frown:

Kitty 2. November 2009, 15:03

The article contains this picture:
You sure you still want to read? :D

Santa Furie 2. November 2009, 15:39

Can't see that either. :eyes: I'm going blind! :cry:

Kitty 2. November 2009, 16:47

It's time to take over Furtopia! :devil:

Santa Furie 2. November 2009, 18:52

This is because your plant friend got infected with that zombie virus we were disposing of, isn't it. awww

r♡se 2. November 2009, 19:05

Yeah... Next time think safety first, will ya? :irked:

David Scott Aubrey 3. November 2009, 01:22

http://www.cracked.com/blog/exploring-the-mysteries-of-the-mind-with-the-sims-3/

Can you not see the link I embedded in the word 'this?' Cois said something similar not so long back. Just asking so I can make my page more mobile-friendly. :smile:

Santa Furie 3. November 2009, 10:50

No, the link is fine. It's wher it links to that causes the problem. Cracked detects mobile browsers and automatically (and very rudely) redirects to it's very badly designed mobile site frontpage, negating any links. To make things worse, they cherry pick which stories are available on the mobile site so the search doesn't really help either. :bomb: I've sent them a rather filthy e-mail about it once a month for the past year.

David Scott Aubrey 3. November 2009, 20:31

I had no idea. Fuckers. What rot!

(Increase frequency of emails to one per week). :wink:

Brad Mengel 6. November 2009, 08:13

Dude, you have so gotta have what I call "The Serial Vigilante Special"
(sadly they don't have frozen blueberry yoghurt to make this perfect)
Your choice of ice-cream flavour mixed with
Snickers and M&Ms.

A special Serial Vigilante Noprize if you figure the serial viglante origins of Blueberry yoghurt, Snickers and M&Ms.

Brad

David Scott Aubrey 8. November 2009, 08:15

If it involves frozen yoghurt, I'm not sure I wanna know ... p: :wink:

Brad Mengel 9. November 2009, 01:50

Well since you ask Michael Weston of Burn Notice eats Blueberry Yoghurt, the Barracan one Mr T eats Snickers "Get some nuts", Tia Carrerra (potential A Team member and Relic Hunter) promoted M&Ms. So Burn Notice, A-Team and Relic Hunter make the Serial Vigilante Special.

David Scott Aubrey 9. November 2009, 02:25

Do you ask for it by name? :wink:

Brad Mengel 9. November 2009, 02:44

No Just pick an ice cream flavor and get snickers and M&Ms

David Scott Aubrey 9. November 2009, 07:44

Will they smush it together on a cold rock for me? I mean, do I have to brace myself for the excitement? :wink:

Brad Mengel 9. November 2009, 11:51

aye

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