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The Dentist Wore Gloves
A collaborative novel from The D&D contributors.Post at your peril!
Not against religion, just run amok religionists
I crept cautiously down the dimly lit hallway toward the sickly beam of light that struggled through the slightly opened door. When I reached the doorway, I peered inside, and a yellow slash of wilted light fell across my chest.
My worst fear bore the wilted fruit that I had anticipated.
The dentist wore latex gloves.
....................................
My worst fear bore the wilted fruit that I had anticipated.
The dentist wore latex gloves.
....................................
Not against religion, just run amok religionists
Suddenly it was clear... The path of escape was lay before me and if I played my cards right that wouldn't be all. I moved towards the back exit hoping not to draw attention from the gloved man awaiting my impending torture. All other concerns seemed to fall away as the fantasy of me and the nurse galloping off grew more prominent in my mind. Her long blonde hair dancing in the wind as she held me tight, the warmth of her body against mine, and the sound of hooves marking our escape. It was all so vivid, reality was pushed aside. Neatly folded and put away like an out of season sweater. Forgotten, irrelevant, I was lost. Lost between worlds of extremes.
That's when it happened...
That's when it happened...
20. July 2012, 06:36:42 (edited)
Darting into an adjoining passageway, I discovered that I'd been transported to China! The door slammed shut behind me.
In perfect Mandarin, I asked a passing cyclist if he knew where the nearest Mc漢字 s' restaurant was located. He smiled an evil Chinese smile.
In perfect Mandarin, I asked a passing cyclist if he knew where the nearest Mc漢字 s' restaurant was located. He smiled an evil Chinese smile.
Not against religion, just run amok religionists
Then he fell off his bike because he was not looking where he was going.
Noticing a restaurant nearby, called 挑剔的食客高兴的狗食, I went in and sat down and was given a bowl of water and a biscuit. The waiter game over with the menu and recommended ....
Noticing a restaurant nearby, called 挑剔的食客高兴的狗食, I went in and sat down and was given a bowl of water and a biscuit. The waiter game over with the menu and recommended ....
He who calls a man a fool defines himself
...which were fashioned from the finest leopard skin latex. Clearly, the man was wealthy. Still, one glance at his long...
Not against religion, just run amok religionists
...a bowl of crisps, the London Times, and a partridge in a pear tree.
Once those requirements were satisfied, I decided that a survey of the ladies of the burgh was required. Hence, I donned my gay apparel and set about to ...
Once those requirements were satisfied, I decided that a survey of the ladies of the burgh was required. Hence, I donned my gay apparel and set about to ...
Not against religion, just run amok religionists
... persuade the nice young officer that undressing in public was perfectly innocent.
Later, when I had finished with the form-filling at the cop shop, I resumed my quest for an evening's entertainment and decided to go to a circus. I like circuses, particularly the bareback riding which reminds me of ....
Later, when I had finished with the form-filling at the cop shop, I resumed my quest for an evening's entertainment and decided to go to a circus. I like circuses, particularly the bareback riding which reminds me of ....
He who calls a man a fool defines himself
My last sexual encounter with a rather strapping bloke in the showers of the local jail, Which was quite an experience, Especially when i accidentally (wink) dropped the soap, And was greeted by a prod from his rather large....
Opera 12.14 - 1738 (Portable 32bit) on Win8 Pro, Or portable versions of Linux Mint 14 or Puppy Linux Upup Precise - 3.8.3.1
...cattle prod!
Imagine my surprise as I rocketed across the stall and into the tiled wall!
Gathering my wits, I called my lawyer, a friend of my ex-wife's third cousin's barber, and asked him to pick up some parsley for a salad that I was planning for a soiree late that evening. Sadly, he told me that....
Imagine my surprise as I rocketed across the stall and into the tiled wall!
Gathering my wits, I called my lawyer, a friend of my ex-wife's third cousin's barber, and asked him to pick up some parsley for a salad that I was planning for a soiree late that evening. Sadly, he told me that....
Not against religion, just run amok religionists
21. July 2012, 14:42:22 (edited)
the local grocer had completely ran out of all herbs, Including parsley, And that he had a rather unkempt and overgrown garden, And would gladly bring some weeds from there instead. While not a great substitute for parsley, It could be rolled for smoking and serve as a little something special for the evening, Unless....
Opera 12.14 - 1738 (Portable 32bit) on Win8 Pro, Or portable versions of Linux Mint 14 or Puppy Linux Upup Precise - 3.8.3.1
...rat droppings, As they are a good source of fibre, And can be a great alternative to peppercorns. But if you are a vegetarian, I can heartily recommend....
Opera 12.14 - 1738 (Portable 32bit) on Win8 Pro, Or portable versions of Linux Mint 14 or Puppy Linux Upup Precise - 3.8.3.1
...that you get a real life and a two inch thick t-bone steak.
Exasperated, I decided to forget the lawyer for the time and visit my cousin in Afghanistan, a stern Salafist with a tendency to prevaricate and an addiction to marketplace bombings. In his softer moments he treated children quite well and women with only enough violence to keep them in line.
He eats pork.
I boarded a train in London which had a direct connect with Kabul.
I was seated next to a sultry Arabic woman who wore ....
Exasperated, I decided to forget the lawyer for the time and visit my cousin in Afghanistan, a stern Salafist with a tendency to prevaricate and an addiction to marketplace bombings. In his softer moments he treated children quite well and women with only enough violence to keep them in line.
He eats pork.
I boarded a train in London which had a direct connect with Kabul.
I was seated next to a sultry Arabic woman who wore ....
Not against religion, just run amok religionists
....Not much really, Save for the very tight top revealing quite a lot of cleavage, Her nipple piercings, And the mini skirt that failed quite miserably at hiding much thigh. Except there was one thing that was slightly peculiar about her, Which was....
Opera 12.14 - 1738 (Portable 32bit) on Win8 Pro, Or portable versions of Linux Mint 14 or Puppy Linux Upup Precise - 3.8.3.1
21. July 2012, 19:44:38 (edited)
«...usine de rechange énergie nucléaire?" I admit to being somewhat aroused, and the thought of the latex gloves flitted through my mind.
"Êtes-vous une culotte, madoiselle?"
"Êtes-vous une culotte, madoiselle?"
Not against religion, just run amok religionists
I guess she needed the nuclear power plant to power her rather power hungry vibrator, Especially when cranked up to speed number 10. I swiftly responded by adding that i do indeed have a well exercised right arm that could do much the same job with fist clenched, While wearing the pair of leopard skin print latex gloves i happened to have about my person.
And as for the panties, I could place them over my head whilst doing her the much needed favour.
Well, That was until....
And as for the panties, I could place them over my head whilst doing her the much needed favour.
Well, That was until....
Opera 12.14 - 1738 (Portable 32bit) on Win8 Pro, Or portable versions of Linux Mint 14 or Puppy Linux Upup Precise - 3.8.3.1
borrowed Debbie does Dallas, Which i actually returned 3 days early, Partly because it was a little too soft for my liking. Plus it had also jammed in the video recorder and failed to play on a few occasions, Which was possibly due to the sticky, Milky residue that was coating the outside of the video case, Hmmmmmmmm!!!. I guess i won't be borrowing adult movies from that library any more, Too unreliable. I guess i'll....
Opera 12.14 - 1738 (Portable 32bit) on Win8 Pro, Or portable versions of Linux Mint 14 or Puppy Linux Upup Precise - 3.8.3.1
... go back to my cell.
In the meantime my Grandmother, who is the Sheriff, in this town had heard of the squirrel smuggling that is going on down by the canoe docking area. She has anounced an investigation to be carried out by. ....
In the meantime my Grandmother, who is the Sheriff, in this town had heard of the squirrel smuggling that is going on down by the canoe docking area. She has anounced an investigation to be carried out by. ....
He who calls a man a fool defines himself
...Steven Hawking into the matter as soon as he has fully dealt with the question as to what God did before he made the universe. While he has yet to finalize his study, Hawking's preliminary findings suggest that He was in dalliance with Roman, Greek, Southern Baptist and Polynesian deities.
More on Grandma later. I might add that she, too, wore latex gloves.
Nanna, you old baggage!
On the squirrel matter, it's worthy of mention that.....
More on Grandma later. I might add that she, too, wore latex gloves.
Nanna, you old baggage!
On the squirrel matter, it's worthy of mention that.....
Not against religion, just run amok religionists
they like playing with their nuts, Have large bushy tails like foxes, And scamper through the trees looking for food.
On a slightly more serious note, Steven Hawking's has expressed an interest in purchasing a few pairs of genuine
squirrel slippers, But has stressed that he requires larger sizes, As he has much bigger feet than most squirrels do,
And could be quite a struggle getting a pair on.
Grandma already has a pair of squirrel slippers that happen to match her squirrel fur-lined latex gloves.
So looks as though corruption is writhe, And we may have to get another party of investigators in to....
On a slightly more serious note, Steven Hawking's has expressed an interest in purchasing a few pairs of genuine
squirrel slippers, But has stressed that he requires larger sizes, As he has much bigger feet than most squirrels do,
And could be quite a struggle getting a pair on.
Grandma already has a pair of squirrel slippers that happen to match her squirrel fur-lined latex gloves.
So looks as though corruption is writhe, And we may have to get another party of investigators in to....
Opera 12.14 - 1738 (Portable 32bit) on Win8 Pro, Or portable versions of Linux Mint 14 or Puppy Linux Upup Precise - 3.8.3.1
...look into the shenanigans in some sectors of D&D.
It might be of interest to some of our members that, having not a tooth in my head, I could care less if the dentist wears latex gloves, jodhpurs, or a bra.
More to the point, though, ignoring that last comma (a typo), is the fact that some members here are....
It might be of interest to some of our members that, having not a tooth in my head, I could care less if the dentist wears latex gloves, jodhpurs, or a bra.
More to the point, though, ignoring that last comma (a typo), is the fact that some members here are....
Not against religion, just run amok religionists
... unless a=0 in which case it does not apply, unless you think C is important in which case Grandma has a place for you.
Speaking of Grandma, she is on a secret mission to Afbolivistan, a state on the verge of properity after the discovery of a huge source of Guano in the interior of the country.
Grandma's mission is to ......
Speaking of Grandma, she is on a secret mission to Afbolivistan, a state on the verge of properity after the discovery of a huge source of Guano in the interior of the country.
Grandma's mission is to ......
He who calls a man a fool defines himself
23. July 2012, 07:54:37 (edited)
.... undermine Afbolivistan's economy, stage a coup, and walk off with the loot...
...........
PS a=0 applies universally. If you don't believe me, give a gander at....
...........
PS a=0 applies universally. If you don't believe me, give a gander at....
Not against religion, just run amok religionists
23. July 2012, 08:13:05 (edited)
Grand Rapids and Wessex.
Moving on....Anxiously await my next post.
Moving on....Anxiously await my next post.
Not against religion, just run amok religionists
...the sound of one hand clapping...
At that point the dentist entered the room and siezed grandma by the ankles...to his amazement they....
At that point the dentist entered the room and siezed grandma by the ankles...to his amazement they....
English is accessible to more people than is Mandarin Dutch.
Realised that aunty actually had the clap, And swiftly let go of her ankles. She fell to the floor with an almighty *THUD* and broke...
Opera 12.14 - 1738 (Portable 32bit) on Win8 Pro, Or portable versions of Linux Mint 14 or Puppy Linux Upup Precise - 3.8.3.1
"Oranges...oranges...oranges...get your fresh oranges!"
But that's not what caught her attention. Instead, a shriek and whistle from inside the cupboard and a dull rumble from the anteroom cut short her scramble for the 3 gold crowns.
"Lord love a duck!", she murmured. I forgot my appointment with.....
But that's not what caught her attention. Instead, a shriek and whistle from inside the cupboard and a dull rumble from the anteroom cut short her scramble for the 3 gold crowns.
"Lord love a duck!", she murmured. I forgot my appointment with.....
English is accessible to more people than is Mandarin Dutch.
The STD clinic, "I really need to have my clap problem seen to, As it can be heard at the most inopportune moments, And can be quite embarrassing when it does" Aunty exclaimed. With that she....
Opera 12.14 - 1738 (Portable 32bit) on Win8 Pro, Or portable versions of Linux Mint 14 or Puppy Linux Upup Precise - 3.8.3.1
dance wildly. Suddenly two gun man broke into the surgery and fired couple of sounds into the air. In response, ...
"Character is a journey, not a destination" -- Bill Clinton
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... the attendant rounded on him and pointed out that silence was the rule in the surgery so that the dentist could hear the patient screaming and adjust the size of the drill he was using.
The attendant strapped the two-gun-man firmly to the dentist's chair and, goring his pleas, began to
The attendant strapped the two-gun-man firmly to the dentist's chair and, goring his pleas, began to
He who calls a man a fool defines himself
A ukulele and a pair of knee cymbals, Whilst head-butting a drum that happened to be nailed to the wall, And drinking a glass of water. In amazement, Everyone else turned and....
Opera 12.14 - 1738 (Portable 32bit) on Win8 Pro, Or portable versions of Linux Mint 14 or Puppy Linux Upup Precise - 3.8.3.1
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