News of the Bizarre

News of the Bizarre

Find the most bizarre / funny news to post. with personal comment.

SYDNEY, Australia (AP) - Sturdier toilets may be on their way in Australia to cope with the country's increasingly obese population.

Standards Australia, a nongovernment group that establishes safety and design standards, is considering recommending strengthening loos for larger users, a spokeswoman said Tuesday.

Obesity levels have been rising for years in Australia.

Standards Australia spokeswoman Kate Evans said the current industry standard for toilet seats is just 100 pounds and that the group is looking to increase it to 330 pounds.

Experts will examine the seats "from the perspective that people are getting bigger," Evans said.

Steve Cummings, a committee member for Standards Australia and head of research and development at toilet maker Caroma Dorf, told Sydney tabloid The Daily Telegraph that toilet seats need to be strengthened for larger Australians.

"If you are going to sit on it, you want it to hold you," he said.

First it was "Bong hits for Jesus" in Oregon, now it's "Pole Dancing for Jesus" in Texas.

From here:

FORT MILL, S.C. -- Motorists on a road near the South Carolina-North Carolina state line have been warned to watch for zombies, hunters and tanks.
The electronic signs on state Highway 160 near Fort Mill that usually warn of traffic construction or wrecks had a very different message Sunday.
One sign read "Zombies Ahead" and then flashed "Watch for Hunters."
On the other side of the road, a sign warned motorists to "Be alert for Tanks."
Highway Patrol Lance Cpl. Billy Elder said someone apparently tampered with the signs sometime before 4 a.m. Sunday.
Elder said investigators don't know if the signs were hacked remotely or at the scene.

There have been no reports of zombies or tanks.

That's what THEY want us to believe

Originally posted by Macallan:

From here:

FORT MILL, S.C. -- Motorists on a road near the South Carolina-North Carolina state line have been warned to watch for zombies, hunters and tanks.........

There have been no reports of zombies or tanks.

That's what THEY want us to believe

Have you seen the sign for 'Jesus walking on water'?

Originally posted by thedawgfan:

First it was "Bong hits for Jesus" in Oregon, now it's "Pole Dancing for Jesus" in Texas.

Hallelujah!

You are breathing in molecules from the last breath of a famous person.

Learn.

Louis Theroux: Westboro Baptist Church revisited

Originally posted by Belfrager:

You are breathing in molecules from the last breath of a famous person.

Learn.

Jack the Ripper?

Naked Man Attacks SWAT Team Robot


http://abcnews.go.com/US/video/naked-man-attacks-swat-team-robot-13321176


I'm afraid to look at it.

A serious proposal from a Cannibal.

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/3574322/Come-die-with-me.html

The would-be cannibal might be a tad short of a full bag of marbles, but he did post that he wanted somebody who planned to commit suicide, so one might say that he's more humane than at first blush. He should simply have taken communion...Body of Christ and all that.

I only report'em...don't make them up.

Debate On Uganda Anti-Gay Bill Delayed

by The Associated Press
May 11, 2011

Uganda's parliament on Wednesday was forced to drop plans to debate a controversial bill that once proposed the death penalty for some gays and lesbians, but officials indicated lawmakers would debate it on Friday.

.........................

And if that one bothers you, try this one.

Originally posted by jbrothernew37:

I only report'em...don't make them up.

Vatican Issues Guidance For Sex Abuse Cases:

by NPR Staff and Wires
May 16, 2011

The Vatican sent a letter to bishops around the world Monday offering guidance on dealing with reports of clerical sexual abuse.

Just in case they couldn't figure it out by themselves. Oy!

I'm Jesus, Riverland man says

Originally posted by www.adelaidenow.com.au:

A COUPLE who say they are Jesus Christ and Mary Magdalene have set up base in Queensland's Bible Belt.

The pair, real names Alan John Miller, who once lived in Loxton in South Australia's Riverland, and Mary Suzanne Luck, operate from rural Wilkesdale near Kingaroy, where they have been joined by an increasing band of followers.

"My name is Jesus, and I'm serious," Miller said in a video recording from one workshop.
...
In one recording he said: "There's probably a million people who say they're Jesus and most of them are in asylums. But one of us has to be. How do I know I am? Because I remember everything about my life."

Originally posted by Macallan:

I'm Jesus, Riverland man says

Originally posted by www.adelaidenow.com.au:

A COUPLE who say they are Jesus Christ and Mary Magdalene have set up base in Queensland's Bible Belt.

The pair, real names Alan John Miller, who once lived in Loxton in South Australia's Riverland, and Mary Suzanne Luck, operate from rural Wilkesdale near Kingaroy, where they have been joined by an increasing band of followers.

"My name is Jesus, and I'm serious," Miller said in a video recording from one workshop.
...
In one recording he said: "There's probably a million people who say they're Jesus and most of them are in asylums. But one of us has to be. How do I know I am? Because I remember everything about my life."

In case you are wondering how that nutter came up with 21 May as the date, refer to this:

They're all frauds and charlatans! Jaybro knows, and you know, too.

Shock after Dutch priest endorses pedophilia AMSTERDAM – The Dutch Catholic Church and the Salesian order are investigating revelations that a Salesian priest served on the board of a group that promotes pedophilia with the full knowledge of his boss. The order's top official in the Netherlands, Delegate Herman Spronck, confirmed in a statement that the priest — identified by RTL Nieuws as 73-year-old "Father Van B." — served on the board of "Martijn," a group that campaigns to end the Dutch ban on adult-child sex.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20110521/ap_on_re_eu/eu_netherlands_pedophile_priest;_ylt=AmBJQiuQ3xk4P2pYF98Kpfhn.3QA;_ylu=X3oDMTNnbnNkOWloBGFzc2V0A2FwLzIwMTEwNTIxL2V1X25ldGhlcmxhbmRzX3BlZG9waGlsZV9wcmllc3QEY2NvZGUDdG9wZ21wZQRjcG9zAzEEcG9zAzEEc2VjA3luX3RvcF9zdG9yaWVzBHNsawNzaG9ja2FmdGVyZHU-

I'd like to think that somebody is jacking us around, but......

This is my greatest WTF moment in years.

Elma, Wash., dairy princess is lactose intolerant
She has to have worked on a dairy farm or shown dairy cows for FFA or 4-H. She must be single.
She must be a legal resident of Washington. She must have a neat, professional appearance without any tattoos or piercings.
These are all the requirements of being a Washington State Dairy Ambassador. As strict as some of these requirements are,
one requirement that might seem logical is missing - namely, that she be able to consume dairy products
About two years ago, Gordon developed lactose intolerance, meaning her body is unable to digest milk and milk products.
When a lactose-intolerant person drinks milk or eats ice cream, it's not pretty. They can experience abdominal pain, diarrhea,
flatulence, bloating, nausea and abdominal distention.


http://seattletimes.nwsource.com/html/localnews/2015143331_apwalactoseintolerantdairyprincess1stldwritethru.html

Jeez that would be a sight to forget..

Drunk Swedish elk found in apple tree near Gothenburg

FRANCIS COLLINS

Director, National Human Genome Research Institute

I see no conflict in what the Bible tells me about God and what science tells me about nature. Like St. Augustine in A.D. 400, I do not find the wording of Genesis 1 and 2 to suggest a scientific textbook but a powerful and poetic description of God's intentions in creating the universe. The mechanism of creation is left unspecified. If God, who is all powerful and who is not limited by space and time, chose to use the mechanism of evolution to create you and me, who are we to say that wasn't an absolutely elegant plan? And if God has now given us the intelligence and the opportunity to discover his methods, that is something to celebrate.

Takes all kinds, eh?

Well that crazy man in Aussie takes the heat off the US for having more nut jobs per head than much of the rest of the world!

http://www.stripes.com/news/pacific/australian-airman-injured-in-july-portable-toilet-explosion-dies-
SASEBO NAVAL BASE, Japan — An Australian airman, injured in a portable-toilet explosion in July, has died. Sgt. Michael “Mick” Dunn was participating in a joint exercise with the U.S. military.

Where was Zeus when this happened?

Judging by the oft liberal use of his name he is never around when needed?

if you are worried about how to use a toilet, see here:

Swansea University puts up toilet instruction posters

I thought "bizarre" indeed but then remembered the toilets that they had in the Russian Space Agency's (RKA) Mission Control Centre. There the instructions were slightly different.

If you look at the small diagram on the right where it shows an "X"s against the gentleman squatting on top of the toilet, well that is exactly how one was meant to use the Russian toilets. They were the same height as what most of us would consider a normal toilet but at the level where the seat should be they had foot rests. When I first visited these luxurious facilities I had some sort of ambition of attending to business, but decided to, er, hold my breath. To get on those things you had no choice, it seemed, than to clamber up, at which stage your head would be well above the cubical walls and; you can imagine the rest.

Or probably the best thing is not to imagine it and move on, if you'll pardon the pun.

I don't know whether those toilets are still there, but I like to think so.

Originally posted by string:

at which stage your head would be well above the cubical walls and; you can imagine the rest

"…oh, hi! So, you're not really paying attention to my foot-tapping?"

From here:

Originally posted by Ed Brayton:

Grand Rapids Invaded by Godwin’s Law
May 6, 2012 at 8:53 am Ed Brayton

Grand Rapids, Michigan is a great town. I live 40 minutes from it and go there all the time. But it’s also a conservative stronghold and home to the evil Amway corporation. And apparently also to crazy people who think Obama is the second coming of Adolf Hitler.

A flyer recently placed on parking meters in downtown Grand Rapids pictures President Barack Obama next to a Nazi swastika, threatening that a “Holocaust is coming.”

“Obama is a puppet,” reads the handout that decries the Affordable Care and the National Defense Authorization acts. “Hitler’s Nazi Germany has been revived in the U.S. and the target is Americans.” …

“Obama’s health care bill is not a health care bill, instead it’s a total government takeover of every area of life (read the fine print) like gun confiscation, euthanasia and so on (euthanizing the poor, the elderly, the ill, those who’ve maxed out their health insurance and so on) there are no jobs and everyone will eventually be poor,” the card states.

There’s nothing on the card to indicate who printed it, but there is a link to a website that urges people to vote for Ron Paul. I’m not shocked by any of this, unfortunately.

Jaybro?

Some of the tv adverts that are allowed are kind of shocking and very improper.