Comprar bolas chinas Exploring The Myth Of Looks
Monday, April 4, 2011 12:44:35 PM
One of the biggest issues I have to deal with when it comes to my students is the idea that they are too ugly to attract women.
It's an insecurity that comes in all sorts of masks. Some examples:
Some guys think they're too old.
Some think they're too fat.
Some think they're too short.
Some think they're too ugly.
Because of this, these men feel they are helpless when it comes to getting the kind of woman they desire.
But lucky for all of us - this simply isn't the case.
I want to take a moment and dispell a few attraction myths that hold men back from achieving success in their love life.
Myth #1 - You have to be good looking to get women.
All you have to do is look around at the various types of guys in this world who are dating gorgeous women to know that this isn't the case.
Something to remember: It's not important to be good looking. It IS, however, important to look good!
The difference?
In a sense, you can't make yourself "good looking". Unless you have some contortionist abilities with your face, or gazillions to spend on plastic surgery. You can EASILY control how you present yourself though. Your clothing, grooming, hairstyle, etc. They all play a part of that.
All these appearance factors contribute to "looking good."
Even the most average looking guy can be attractive when he takes control of his appearance.
Myth #2 - Women Think Like Men Do
It's natural to assume that everyone else in the world sees things the same way you see them.
For instance - If you've ever had a pimple on your forehead that felt so big, it was like everyone could see it. But the pimple was under the skin, and in reality, no one but you could tell it was there.
To you, it was clear as day. To everyone else, it was hardly noticable.
When it comes to appraising other people, this methodology is typically applied. You judge a woman based on how she looks, right? You're able to size a woman up visually and determine whether or not you find her attractive, correct?
So naturally, you assume women are going to size you up the same exact way.
WRONG.
A woman is going to have a different set of criteria for determining what attracts them to us than we do to them. Sure, the physical plays a part of that, but it's far less important for them than it is us.
A woman bases her attraction more on how a man makes her feel, rather than how he looks. Hence, they are attracted to self confidence and high social standing. She'll love a man who makes her laugh, and appreciate a man who is good at what he does. These things are as important, or more so, than looks!
Myth #3 - Women See What Makes Us Insecure
Understand that we know ourselves better than anyone else ever will. We are able to pick out every single flaw there is about ourselves - our big ears, big nose, weak chin, receeding hairline...
No matter what it is, we see it!
And because we see it, we assume everyone else does too. But the fact is, most people aren't very observant, and unless they specifically look for something to criticize you about, they're not going to care about your insecurities, whatever they may be.
A lot of guys try and dismiss their insecurities by calling attention to it, as if to try and "diffuse" whatever it is they feel is ugly about them. But all this does is draw the woman's attention to this insecurity, and only at that point do people notice it.
And insecurity is always UNattractive.
It's important, in every situation, that you always focus on the good stuff about you, instead of your shortcomings, and have the positives outshine the negatives.
Myth #4 - Good Looking Guys Have It Easy
This is a huge, prevalent myth that most men believe. It's just assumed - if you are good looking, you'll attract good looking mates.
Good looking guys have their own struggles with women. Sure, being physically attractive helps them initially, but in the long run, they have the same issues other men have.
Attraction is tantamount to amplifying the emotion a woman feels while she's around you, and then have those same emotions become associated with you specifically, in her eyes. That way, you'll become the source of them.
If a man matches a woman's physical type, she'll gravitate to him because those features make her feel good. But if the guy is boring, or a jerk, or just not compatible, those feelings will go away.
However, if you take a guy that the woman maybe isn't initially physically attracted to, and then have him make her experience feelings of fun, excitement, and pleasure - she WILL become attracted to him eventually.
This is the fundamental concept of attraction - when you make other people feel good, they will want to be around you.
You don't have to be a good guy to make women feel good! You just need to know how to interact with them.
But the second aspect to this equation is physical attraction.
This is where, in addition to making people feel good, you also turn them on.
And this is where seduction comes in.
When you begin to lead a woman down the path of attraction, even if you don't look like Brad Pitt, she's going to begin to see you in a whole new light - despite any of the shortcomings you may think you have.
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