Thursday, September 22, 2011 6:34:38 AM
When I sleep I dream of things that haunt me from my past,
So my past never lets my resting last,
I try to think of the things that wont scare me or make me sad,
I’d hope they would make me glad,
Instead they made me think of my abusive dad,
These dreams I would rather not keep,
For once I would like to get a good night’s sleep,
I had bought a dream catcher the other day,
The Indians said that it would chase the dreams away,
I just wish I could sleep till the next day,
As I fall asleep I think of the peace I seek,
When I get to sleep what do I see a tribe of Indians staring back at me,
These are the great protectors of my dreams that the dream catchers gave to me,
They are supposed to get rid of my bad dreams,
With their tomahawks at there side,
It’s like having my own teem of hatchet men all the time to protect me when I sleep,
Now I find I can sleep just fine with peaceful dreams that sooth me,
Now that my dreams have quit giving me feelings of fear and sadness,
I have the will to succeed,
It’s like the dream catcher brought the hatchet man out of me.
Thursday, September 22, 2011 6:33:34 AM
My soul is in pain, people torment others and what do they gain?
The tormented soul gains only in humane intentions,
These people that created the pain apparently don't understand what they do to this man, they just place the blame as if it wasn't them as if they don't see the pain in the eyes of the soul they slay every day,
I'm going insane to the point of wanting to put a bullet in their brain,
But it wont help any thing just imprison me again, damn I'm confused,
I don't know what to do,
I can’t go after whose to blame,
And I can’t stand and endure the attacks that happen over and over again,
It feels like I'm being called out as a man I can’t stand it,
And my soul demands that I do something about it,
Between the feelings in me and the people that attack me again and again they are driving me insane!!!!
Thursday, September 22, 2011 6:32:23 AM
You are the image of an enemy,
You make me went to commit murder literally,
With every word you speak to me you cause only pain,
With every word you speak I want to give you the action you seek,
Every time you see me you are mean to me,
And I just want to I just want drown you in the deepest part of the sea,
Every time you’re around all you do is tear me down,
And I want to knock you around,
Every time you see my face you think of what you can do to me today,
And every time I see yours I want to slam it in a door,
These feelings come so easy,
Because of how mean you are to me,
I’m not really mean but the way you treat me makes me want to see you bleed,
I know you can’t always be as cruel as you seem,
Why wont you let me be,
Because you’re going to make me hurt you and I mean it,
Cant you see your getting me real fucking heated.
Thursday, September 22, 2011 6:30:56 AM
The soul is a coven that is sacred and that dwells on the thoughts of your world,
And is tormented by the scars of your past and future I am a withered soul doomed to my own regrets, at times my regrets makes my soul feel as if its being stabbed to death with no remorse,
no way to break free and no hope for me, this world can be evil due to the people who live in it , showing you the ass end of everything you do, they are not knowing that your soul consumes this treachery feeling the pain and sorrow of everything they do,
And to who takes the blame except thyself, because if you didn't open your soul to the world it wouldn't know the pain you put it through,
Yet if you shield your soul from the world you may never find someone to help heal the scars of time, when you bare your soul to to another you are hoping to find the love you yearn for,
You may find a pain that can haunt your soul for eternity the pain is real even though no physical scars show through,
They are like stains on the sheets of your past,
Why can’t you just wash them away?
It is because of the lessons that make you you play the game,
It is love you search for and without the pains you may never learn how gain the love you yearn for through the pain.
Thursday, September 22, 2011 6:29:14 AM
The feeling is mutual I hate him and he hates me,
The bastard wants to see me bleeding;
He grabs me up every time he sees me,
He wont let me be; what is the reason for this I need to know before I leave,
He was considered to be my father now he hates me,
I’m not his and by this he means to see me bleed,
Will I be here in the morning; I wonder wile I try to sleep,
The morning comes and whom do I see? Just him standing over me with a pillow,
Owe shit I cant breath; I kick and scream he wont let me be,
I turn my head to catch a breath hoping I don’t suffocate to death,
He was a role model now he’s just someone I want to hit with a beer bottle,
Man what did I do to him why does he try to kill me while I sleep?
The world is all cold and I’m all alone waiting for this man to leave us alone,
He tries to kill me he beats on my mom,
The abuse is all well known he won’t stop till he’s dead, so I tried to take a bat to his head;
He threw me across the room into the TV god I am doomed he stomped me and hit me in the head ,
I kept thinking owe shit I’m dead, the next morning I wake up with a shot gun in my face ;owe god my brains are going to be splattered all over the place,
Well here it goes the reprocutions from the night before my clothes are still torn and blood is all over the floor,
Now there’s more don’t he think that was enough no he comes back for more,
I run for the door as he splinters the door I jump through the whole already made,
Man I got to say that was awfully close to my head;
I ran down the stair’s to my mom who pushed me away ,
I thought to myself what the hell am I supposed to do,
Here he comes for round two fuck that instead I flew to the door not knowing what to do,
To the streets I go to start a new I would be there in the morning cause man I can move.
Thursday, September 22, 2011 6:27:42 AM
The world is hectic and throws us around like a whirlwind not knowing where your going only knowing where you been trying to latch onto something strong enough to last hoping that you may have found something at last, not knowing what’s in-store just knowing that its yours if only for a moment before your life begins whirl and throws you to a different course only for that moment is your life norm, the world begins to whirl you loose your footing the ground you start to worry about as you start to dart across life’s path looking for a new start living life as it comes to you feeling an empty whole in your heart, try to stay calm and know where it ends there is a new start, life is like a whirlwind when it comes to your heart the cycle will end when you began to realize you are the thing that keeps you a ground and there is no whirlwind when you hold your heart deer and then they will come and throw you around again only if you let them in.
You are in control of this whirlwind when you hold your heart in your own hands life is just a search for what you want and the only thing you need is yourself that is a hard lesson indeed.
Thursday, September 22, 2011 6:25:57 AM
When you realize the world denies and despises you ‘
When you realize that the ties you have sewn between your friends and these girls with double D’s seize to exist then you get pissed.
I go through the list and wish to see just one being with the best interest for me in mind’ when I see one time the eyes with me in mind, I will know in time I will be fine,
Until then I would be lying if I said I know one fine soul that would support someone other than there own,
I feel so alone and I don’t know what I’ve done wrong,
All I want to do is to see at least one person who said they would be there actually be there,
When I think of it I’m glad I can’t shed a tear, so I can look strong instead of scared.
A strong man is feared and a scared man is weird especially when they fear the feelings instead of physical things,
It’s like a test of the world to throw a man to the wolves and leave him alone to feel so disowned and in this world that is so cold,
The test lets me know that I am alone and the world is really that cold,
I won’t fold or let being alone make me feel cold and froze.
I can still throw bow’s and roll through my life like a self made man with a heart just as cold.