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Posts tagged with "humor"

Zagg invisibleSHIELD Review

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Zagg invisibleSHIELD Might be the hottest new product for the gadget generation.
My son came in with this body shield on his G1 phone and attacked it with a key. Not a mar one.
I, of course, had to have one of my own and purchased a full body kit for Lenora's myTouch phone.

I am a cell phone holster junkie. Hard cases, leather cases, clips, and ropes. I have tried them all and this may turn out to be the answer to many gadget user's prayers.

I found it fairly easy to install and the feel is fantastic. One of the things I liked about the myTouch was the looks of the shiny case but it this also made it a disaster to hang on to. It didn't take much to make it go shooting right out of your hand. Zagg fixed that. The shine is still there but the phone now has a tacky feel. Much more secure.
It was made up of many small pieces but if you keep your fingers and the phone moist, intermediate skills can apply the whole thing in about thirty minutes.

The shield comes with a lifetime warranty and they seem eager to ship you a new one should something happen to your old one. Just make sure you keep your receipt. (more on that to come)
Although I was happy to pay almost $30 for mine at Best Buy, I found you can get them on eBay or straight from the company site for around $25.

Now for the bad.
The plastic shield comes stuck to a piece of slick coated paper. I am sure anyone who has ever applied a sticker knows what I mean. The kit that I used had an issue with the backing wanting to separate. The slick side of the backing tore off along with the shield. Not a big thing and I over came this once I knew about the issue but one piece was rendered useless because of a wrinkle caused by this.
It was the screen protector part.
The email support I received got to be hilarious. I even pasted it into this blog so all could enjoy but it turned out to be just too long so I had to take it out.
They would have been glad to send me another whole kit but they needed an itemized receipt and even advised I could get a duplicate receipt at Best Buy. (seventy-five miles away)
Not even a copy of the credit transaction and a picture of the defective product was good enough. To get my screen protector, I had to go get the copy, strip the shield off my phone, order a new shield kit on my credit card, and when I return the complete old shield, they credit my account.
Since I didn't want to strip my phone I kept asking if I could just buy a new screen protector. These pleas were just ignored. I did give up and went to their site to find they do sell them separate and they are many times cheaper on eBay.
In an effort to provide such a great warranty and confidence in their product they have completely destroyed confidence in their customer support. I will pick up a copy of my receipt though, next time I am through that town because I am hearing these things start giving problems after about a year.

I think I will try a different brand next time on my G1. GadgetShieldz sells one for about $8. I might send them an email just to see what support is like.

UPDATE: In yet another email from Zagg, it is explained that the way the warranty works is:
You have a hold put on your card for 25 days. They send you a brand new complete kit. You only strip off the bad piece from your phone and replace it from the kit. You then send the kit back, with the bad piece, and the hold is released. This works. They just failed to realize that I didn't care.

Bandera County Jailer Shot

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No. Not in a felonious escape attempt but as the result of a misplaced game of hide-and-seek.
Thinking he was going to pull a prank on two dispatchers on duty by hiding in a dark room at the Jail & Justice Center and scaring them, Daniel Spengler instead startled Sheriff's Deputy A.J. Griffin, and ended up shot.

The dispatchers, all female, had been hearing strange noises outside and in the administrative area of the building. When a dispatcher heard rattling noises outside of her door, she looked into the corridor and saw nothing. When she heard the rattling noises again, she asked Griffin to investigate.

The first room he inspected was empty; the second appeared to be empty, but it was dark and difficult to see. Spengler was hiding behind something, then jumped out making a growling noise. Startled, Griffin jumped back and discharged his firearm, shooting the jailer in the right leg.

Spengler will likely have to have more surgery, however his injury is not life threatening. Both men are on paid administrative leave.

It is not know whether Spengler, a certified jailer who has been with the SO for one-and-a-half years, would be entitled to coverage from Worker's Compensation because playing a prank "is not part of his job description."

UPDATE:
I just found this.

Palin vs Letterman

Former veep candidate Palin and her family were the focus of Letterman's "Top Ten" list broadcast Tuesday night. But it was a line in his monologue about Palin's visit to Yankee Stadium with her 14-year-old daughter, Willow, that set off waves of criticism.

One awkward moment for Sarah Palin at the Yankee game, during the seventh inning, her daughter was knocked up by Alex Rodriguez


Letterman tried to calm the storm by saying he was making the crack about 18-year-old single mom Bristol Palin - not Willow
Letterman has been getting a lot of millage from the Palins ever since he took on the the Republicans and, to all outward appearances, made it his personal quest to get Obama elected. Of course it is his job to poke fun at anything and everything but it seems he has rode the Palin pony into the ground. Now others are beginning to think twice about his rhetoric.

I told a bad joke. I told a joke that was beyond flawed, and my intent is completely meaningless compared to the perception. And since it was a joke I told, I feel that I need to do the right thing here and apologize for having told that joke. It's not your fault that it was misunderstood, it's my fault that it was misunderstood. So I would like to apologize, especially to the two daughters involved, Bristol and Willow, and also to the governor and her family and everybody else who was outraged by the joke. I'm sorry about it and I'll try to do better in the future.


A Web site called FireDavidLetterman.com is organizing a rally outside Letterman's show.
Polls do show that a lot of people are upset about this but I don't think it will ever go as far as firing him. I do think his reputation has finally been scared by taking things a little too far. He has contended that Palin is fair game for his repeated shots because she let her daughter get pregnant. Yeah, dumb analogy but he is a comedian not politician.
Now he has committed as big a sin as she. All the excuses in the world won't change that he screwed up his facts. He is responsible for advocating child abuse just as much as Palin is responsible for her 17 year old getting tossed but the hockey star. I'm sure Letterman didn't write the joke, I'm sure Palin didn't watch the kid diddle her daughter.
Maybe we can watch Late Night again now without having to endure the Letterman politics. Who does he think he is anyway... Oprah?


Perez Hilton is Heterophobic!

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Perez Hilton, aka Mario Armando Lavandeira, Jr., some how got invited to judge the MISS USA Pageant. Can you imagine this guy judging anyone?
Perez, famous for being on the internet, makes his living by blogging about gay celebrities, real and imagined.
Seems he is obsessed with the idea that everyone is a closet homo and should declare it openly to the world. He just won't except the fact that there are varying degrees of sexuality between Chuck Norris and him. So I was a little shocked to see him judging a woman's beauty pageant anyway.

Now enter Miss California. Her state has just voted to not allow gay marriage. What better than to represent the will of the constabulary. Noooooo! Mister "you-gotta-be-gay" has to make that an issue. "What do you think of Gay Marriage?" Now she is faced with a dilemma. From this very second, Hilton has changed the outcome from a candidate winning the pageant to a "Miss California Loses the Pageant". Does anyone remember who won? I just keep seeing the image of Hilton saying he just wanted to get up on stage and scratch her eyes out. Truth is, he just wants to get on stage to do anything.

Point is, he made the whole thing his private statement about homosexuality. Yes, I know this is 2009 and I do believe in gay marriage but for this attention whore to ruin the most sexist show on TV for his own publicity is a little over the top even for him.

Perez! Sometimes you just have to admit, not everyone wants to be gay.

ATM Maddness

I was sitting at the drive through ATM the other day, trying to see the screen through the sun glare, when I noticed that the keys all have Braille markings on them.
My mind wanders to the sight of a blind person pulling up and having to feel for the correct numbers. It wanders again as I question what they push for "English".
It is about that time the car behind me honks so I know I have taken too much time to to buy my $20 bill for $22.50 and start to pull off.
Was that guy shaking a white cane at me?

Where Did I Park my Car?

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I have known people that have, after a big night on the town, forgotten where they parked their car. Actually I have known people that didn't even know they had a car. I have even... er, known people that have even woken in the front seat not knowing where they were.

Of course this was back before DWI was a bad thing. Every country community had it's village idiot that we all knew would have his pick up in a ditch someplace on Sunday morning. His kin would go out with the tractor to find him after church. Mean while he was left there to sober up where he would be safe and off the road. If you ran across them on Saturday night, stuck in the ditch, you just left them there, unless there was a cow under the truck or something.

So it goes, through out time and society, we have had a beloved town drunk. And this town drunk and his antics have been a timeless source of amusement.

The problem is that with all the competition, it is harder and harder to hang on to the title of "Town Drunk".
Here is a man in Germany who has set the bar!

Imagine if you will... he wakes up in church. His family meets him there. The Lord has called him home.

Seems he missed a turn and was launched thirty feet into the air and across the street after hitting a dirt bank.

Tongues will be wagging about this for a long, long time.

50's Anyone?

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If you are old enough to remember this picture, click on it.
You will enjoy where it takes you.
If you don't recognize the picture, click on it anyway and listen to some good music.


Life Support

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I told Lenora, "Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state dependent on some machine. If that ever happens, just pull the plug."

Lenora said,"OK," and she got up and unplugged my laptop.

Today is her birthday. She is 39 again.

Happy Birthday, Baby.
I love you.

Misconception - 72 Black Eyed Virgins

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Muslim martyrs will not go to heaven and marry 72 black eyed virgins. This idea stems from a mistranslation: the Quran says martyrs going to heaven will get “hur,” and the word was taken by early commentators to mean “virgins.” But in Aramaic, hur meant “white” and was commonly used to mean “white grapes,” which the Quran compares to crystal and pearls, and contemporary accounts have paradise abounding with fruit, especially white grapes.

Boy, there is going to be quite a few disgruntled terrorist in heaven with a jet engine stuck up there backside, wondering where their virgins are and what the heck is with all this fruit.

Where’s the blue suitcase with explosives inside?

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Somewhere in the world, there’s a navy blue suitcase with a small pack of explosives tucked in its side pocket.

Four days after police at Charles de Gaulle Airport slipped some plastic explosives into a random passenger’s bag as part of an exercise for sniffer dogs, it is still missing — and authorities are stumped and embarrassed.

Police have sought to minimize public concern by insisting there’s nothing to worry about: The explosives had no detonator and are unlikely to pose a danger.

Authorities believe the suitcase left Paris between 5 p.m. and 7 p.m. on Friday and could have wound up on any of about 100 flights.

Two police officers involved in the exercise stashed a cell-phone sized pack of plastic explosives into the side pocket of the navy blue suitcase as it rolled along a conveyor belt.
One dog successfully identified the bag, but police then lost track of it when they went to fetch a second dog for the exercise.

“That’s how the explosives disappeared,” said Bouquin, noting that police have not lost hope of retrieving the explosives — someday.