Edward Piercy

Crazy Stripper Names

Monday, 14. July 2008, 21:53:42

There is a good amount of research that goes into a story or novel. Some
of that is fairly serious stuff. But not all of it is. On my first novel, Dusk
Until Dawn, I had some fun researching antique mantle clocks, which had
always interested me for some reason. And even in the fairly serious
Darkness Around Me Like a Cloak there is a section where Pat Maginess
buys an engagement ring, so I spent the better part of a day researching
gemstones, which I knew practically nothing about. All those bright and
shiny and colorful stones! It was quite mesmerizing -- especially after
about two cups of coffee.

I'm now in the process of "making notes" (as I term it) for the new
novel, Years and Shadows. Making notes for me is primarily a mental
thing. I do write some things down on 4x6 index cards, which I use
extensively side by side with my computer and text editor. For this
book, though, the list of characters, which I normally would have put
down on index cards, is so large, and the interrelationships between
them is so complex, that instead of using my normal note cards I used
a big artist's sketch book and did a kind of flow-chart between them.

Which might be interesting, I don't know, but it is really off-topic.
What I really wanted to talk about is that in this new book Pat Maginess
is searching for a missing woman named Ann O'Gallagher. As Maginess
investigates he is drawn back through time, back through the years,
finding more information about the missing woman.

One of the things he discovers along the way is that for a brief period
many years before, Ann O'Gallagher worked as a stripper.

Now I don't know how many of you out there are familiar with strippers
and strip joints -- I would assume (ahem) that none of you are. So let
me say just in case you don't know (and once again I'm sure you don't)
that strippers rarely use their own name at the clubs they work at.
Instead, they make up a name. I guess you could call it a stage name.
But I'll just call it a stripper name. Porn stars (which I am sure you
know nothing about at all) also use fake names.

Now, there's sort of a tradition with stripper and porn star names.
Namely, that they should sound sleazy as hell. That's part of "joining
the club" in those occupations, and most strippers and porn stars are
proud of their names. And, at least in the case of strippers, adopting
a fake name has a secondary purpose -- it can better help protect you
from being stalked by some nut-job if they don't know your real name.

Even though my novel is set in 1953, this tradition of stripper names
goes back a ways and it is likely that Ann O'Gallagher would not have
used her real name in that occupation. They didn't exactly call them
"strippers" back then, of course. They were generally known as burlesque
dancers or simply as "show girls" -- not only did they put on a show,
but they tended to show off a lot more skin than your average woman
would in public.

So what I needed to come up with was a stripper name for Ann
O'Gallagher.

But before I get to the list of names I have come up with, let's
digress a bit. Last night I decided to see what was out there on the
internet that might be of help. So I googled the string "stipper
names." And I got quite a good number of sites. Most of them weren't
too helpful really, at least not in terms of what I am trying to come
up with.

I did find one interesting site that let's you put your name (or
someone else's, like Ann O'Gallagher) in and it will automatically
generate a stripper name. For Ann, it came up with the stripper name
Satinne Jagger. I really don't like that one. And it doesn't really
seem to fit a flame redhead like Ann.

Just out of curiosity, I decided to try my own name. You know, just in
case I should ever want to become a porn star. My name generated the
stripper name Hunter Sizemore. But I think I would jazz that one up a
bit and make it Hunter S. Sizemore.

I guess I'm just an old-fashioned guy when it comes to stripper names.
(And I can't believe I just wrote that sentence.) To me, a stripper
name should consists of two parts -- a first name and a last name. It
should be sleazy or suggestive sounding, or (in the way things work
sometimes in that industry) have this aura of romance. It should also
sound fake, definitely one that you wouldn't run into normally, but
nevertheless one that would sound kinda-sorta okay printed on a
driver's license.

So, here's the list I've got so far for Ann O'Gallagher:

Tawny Mellons

Tawny Apples

Busty Rogers

Fanny Lamb

Bunny Hopkins

Sandy Lake

Candy Kane

Ginger Bush

Cherry Poker

Mona Lotts

Tawny Mellons and Tawny Apples are very common stripper names. Neither
sounds like it would fit the redheaded Ann.

Busty, Fanny, and Bunny I haven't made up my mind on. I do sort of
like Fanny Lamb, though.

Sandy Lake is a very traditional stripper name. But that one sounds
like it would fit more with an ash blonde with a tan body who actually
spends a lot of time on the beach. And if you've ever dated a redhead,
you will know that they tend not to spend too much time out in the sun
on the beach or by the pool. It's like dating a damn vampire.

Now Candy Kane and Ginger Bush both would fit a redhead perfectly, of
course. The trouble with Candy Kane is that is has been used so often.
Ginger Bush is fairly rare, but it doesn't quite have the "pop" to it
that Candy Kane does.

As for Cherry Poker, that one might be a little too outrageous even for
me to use.

Right now I'm leaning heavily towards Mona Lotts. It doesn't suggest
a redhead, but it does have a nice memorable ring to it and, most
importantly, it makes me laugh.

So, care to throw any suggestions into the pool? You should know,
however, that if I like the stripper name you come up with, and if I
decide to use it, you will get no reimbursement whatsoever.

You will get my heartfelt thanks, though -- or my name isn't Hunter S.
Sizemore.

Photos Revisited #5Angeliki: Aufwiedersehn

Comments

1 2 Next »

Stardancer # 14. July 2008, 22:52

Mine came up as "Shauntee Sizemore"! Now, I know we don't have the same real last name, unless your real last name is not Piercy!

That is just too cool!

Stardancer # 14. July 2008, 22:54

Putting "Stardancer" in there resulted in the name, "Shantelle Constance". That's just downright boring.

edwardpiercy # 14. July 2008, 22:58

God, that's just hilarious, Star. It's like a husband and wife (or sister and brother -- no, let's not go there) porn star pair.

Oil Field Sluts 2...starring...Shauntee Sizemore...and Hunter S. Sizemore...

edwardpiercy # 14. July 2008, 22:59

And BTW, my last name is really Piercy. No shit.

Shantelle Constance sounds like some R&B singer name. Yeah, pretty boring.

Stardancer # 14. July 2008, 23:02

Yeah, let's not do the "brother/sister" thang. I just live in Arkansas. Wasn't born here.

edwardpiercy # 14. July 2008, 23:14

Kissin Cousins, well...

You know maybe it's just me, but I think that Taylor Swift sounds very much like a sleazy stripper name.

Oil Field Sluts 3...starring Shauntee Sizemore...Taylor Swift...Hunter S. Sizemore...Fanny Lamb...and Dick Chainy.

ellinidata # 14. July 2008, 23:47

"Most of them weren't
too helpful really, at least not in terms of what I am trying to come
up with."

but of course !!!!

"honey drop" says "hello !"

and the funny thing it is I like it !!!

since my phone/provider has a friends last name
my marital name it is Cypriot
and my maiden name is Greek the combination was so confusing "honey drop" was not bad after all!

edwardpiercy # 14. July 2008, 23:54

Is that what you really got? That's actually cool.

But I already had you all lined up in the program as Angel Cumellons.

Well, Honey Drop, glad you could join in!

ellinidata # 15. July 2008, 00:02

I answer to all names !

edwardpiercy # 15. July 2008, 00:13

Blogger Babes Mad Ball XXX...starring Shauntee Sizemore...Honey Drop...Anton Longwood...Mona Lotts...Dick Cannon...Fanny Lamb...Hunter S. Sizemore...Mark Darko...Taylor Swift...Harry Balzac...with a special appearance by iJustine.

ellinidata # 15. July 2008, 00:16

now we are talking !

Stardancer # 15. July 2008, 00:25

Wow. I take a short break to put a couple of chocolate cheesecakes in the oven and come back to find the cast list bloomin' like an Australian onion!

edwardpiercy # 15. July 2008, 00:35

OH DON'T MENTION AUSTRALIA!

Ah, too late...

...Australian onions.

Chocolate Cheesecake, huh.

Stardancer # 15. July 2008, 00:37

Crap.

(Yeah, chocolate cheesecake. It's the only pie I know how to bake from scratch, and it's just scrumptious. And no, I was NOT suggesting that as a stripper name.

)

edwardpiercy # 15. July 2008, 00:51

I was thinking about it!

Angeliki is serving up these things called Flirtinis.

Bunny Flirtini?

ellinidata # 15. July 2008, 00:55

sounds good to me!
and I took a small brake to put in my oven carrot cake and brownies! (from a box) no credit to the cook...it has been a hell of a day again !

so,
bunny flirtini,
Carrot delight,
chocolate shine,
brownie crumbs!

hahahha what about Julia Child ???

edwardpiercy # 15. July 2008, 00:58

Peachy Fine?

Cherry Pisano?

Stardancer # 15. July 2008, 01:00

Ya'll crack me up!

ellinidata # 15. July 2008, 01:03

liquid muse
negroni smooth

ellinidata # 15. July 2008, 01:04

Star,
I will miss you all for 6 weeks!

I m going to have a limoncello

edwardpiercy # 15. July 2008, 01:15

Busty Cello?

Heady Cummins?

Angeliki, what will be your last blogging day?

ellinidata # 15. July 2008, 01:20

a little Asian flavor please

Tokyo Dreams:
Tokyo Dreams (Martini Glass)

1 chopped lychee
1/4 ounce lime juice
1/2 teaspoon freshly grated ginger
1 1/2 ounces mandarin orange juice
3 ounces Fre Alcohol-Removed Premium White
Garnish: 1 tablespoon powdered sugar, 1 whole lychee on a cocktail skewer

Rim a martini glass with powdered sugar. Muddle lychee, lime juice, sugar and ginger in the bottom of a mixing glass or cocktail shaker. Fill with ice, add wine. Shake vigorously and strain into a chilled martini glass. Place the cocktail skewer across the rim of the glass.

ellinidata # 15. July 2008, 01:23

wrong post!

I thought we were at mine "You can not touch this! "

edwardpiercy # 15. July 2008, 01:32

The studly Hunter S. Sizemore was too busy eating his celery soup to notice...

ellinidata # 15. July 2008, 01:42

Sahara cream for you then!!!

PainterWoman # 15. July 2008, 01:55

How about:

Flame Redlands
Red Finnese
Monica Fire
Blaze Touche'
Desire' Desire
Doris Delight
Penelope Plum or Plume

edwardpiercy # 15. July 2008, 02:03

Hey, wow. That's a good list!

I really like Monica Fire. Or maybe Monica Flame.

If you tire of art, Pam, maybe you could manage a strip club.

(just joking, of course

)

Stardancer # 15. July 2008, 02:05

Angeliki, where are you going?

And have a great time!

PainterWoman # 15. July 2008, 02:13

My real name got me: Donatella Sizemore

Another relative?

Then Painter Woman: Shantelle Constance....the same that Stardancer got! Weird!

Stardancer # 15. July 2008, 02:24

I'm starting to think the owner of that website is from Arkinsaw!

edwardpiercy # 15. July 2008, 02:24

I'm beginning to think that the programmer who wrote that Stripper Name Converter has some sort of obsession with someone named "Sizemore."

Incidentally, I've been thinking about Monica Flame, and that one is going on to the short list.

(This was at least PARTIALLY about work!

)

Stardancer # 15. July 2008, 02:25

Uh huh.

edwardpiercy # 15. July 2008, 02:31

Dick Sizemore will never know what his rejection of poor nerdy Beth has spawned!!

ellinidata # 15. July 2008, 02:57

I love P.W's list!!!
great stuff!

ellinidata # 15. July 2008, 02:58

thank you Star!

see for a msg in my last post tomorrow night,
every body gets a different one

PainterWoman # 15. July 2008, 03:43

"Pam, maybe you could manage a strip club":

A strip club....hmmmmm. Actually that wouldn't be a bad place to do some gesture drawings in.

Now if I owned the strip club, I'll have to change my name to Pamelita Sizemore because my last name is Italian and there are far too many of my ex's relatives in Chicago who would want a pissa my pie. I'm not kidding...and I better shut up.

"I love P.W's list!!!
great stuff!":

Thanks Angeliki.

I used to make up names all the time as a kid and then, of course, I make up names for all my paintings and the people or creatures in them.

edwardpiercy # 15. July 2008, 03:55

I always give people different names. Whether they like it or not. I'm serious, kind of a bad habit of mine...renaming things.

A pissa your pie, huh. Well, you're better off with the Mormons in Mesa, then. They generally don't wanta pissa your pie, just a few minuta of your time.

ellinidata # 15. July 2008, 03:58

practice makes perfect!!!
great list!

I confused the name creator and I got out of 2 Greek names One Cypriot and one Italian (yes I use all) , the name "honey drop"

it's like the automated phone system you don't press a number,
you get the operator!