La Galaxia de Estrellas

A red-faced village cricket team have blamed a "dodgy wicket" after 10 of their batsmen were out for a duck and the last man was left stranded on nought. Goldsborough 2nds went into bat against table-topping Dishforth in North Yorkshire's Nidderdale Amateur League knowing they would be in for a tough game. But they expected at least one of their batsmen to trouble the scorers. Goldsborough did escape the ignominy of finishing their innings on zero, thanks to five extras from the generous Dishforth bowlers, who removed their opponents inside 12 overs. They were also spared the title of English cricket's worst-ever side, thanks to Midlands team Shepstone, who were all out for four extras in 1931. Goldsborough chairman Henry Webster did his best to defend his players, saying:

It was a very, very dodgy wicket. When Dishforth came in to bat, they only needed six but they were 0 for two at one point - and we dropped two catches as well. It could have been nought for four.

What he failed to mention was that Dishforth put their worst batsmen in first to try to give their beleaguered rivals a sporting chance - taking seven balls to wrap up an eight-wicket win.
Goldsborough captain Peter Horseman was a little more realistic, admitting:

It was surreal and embarrassing. We almost got a run but the batsman turned it down because he'd just been hit on the foot the ball before.

Horseman's opposite number, Steve Wilson said:

If I hadn't seen it I wouldn't have thought it was possible.

Gavin Hardisty was the pick of the Dishforth bowlers, finishing with figures of 7-0, while Gary Lawson was the game's top scorer with five. Chairman Webster refused to be disheartened by the performance, adding:

This team were 210-2 a few weeks ago. They can bat. One of the players hit 109 not out. They really are not that bad. It's not something we're proud of but we have to look on the funny side of it.

And England thought they had problems.